Words

One Word for 2022

/ edebock / 1 Comment

For the past few years I’ve chosen one word to inspire or guide me in the new year as well as a scripture verse to go along with it. There’s actually a whole #OneWord365 movement on the internet urging members to choose a word to focus on every day, all year long; a word that sums up who they want to be or how they want to live.

Much has been said over the past 22 months about how the Covid-19 crisis has robbed us of our freedom. Thinking about that led me to my word for 2022.

Freedom

Interestingly, of the 165 people worldwide who have registered their One Word for 2022 online so far, I’m the only one who chose freedom! I’m a tribe of one!

The Bible verse that I chose to go with this year’s word is a good transition from last year when my word was TRUTH.

“You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

So what is freedom? Oxford Languages defines it this way:

  1. the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint
  2. absence of subjection to foreign domination or despotic government
  3. the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved

There are really two kinds of freedom, freedom to and freedom from. There is no doubt that the Covid-19 pandemic has, at least temporarily, curtailed our freedom to travel, to gather in large groups, to celebrate special moments with those we love, to enjoy many of the activities that we once took for granted, and so on. Though it’s difficult to be optimistic with the Omicron variant running rampant, I do hold out hope that some of these freedoms might be returned to us before this new year comes to an end.

As I settled on freedom as my One Word for this year, however, it was actually freedom from that was at the forefront of my mind. While I’m enormously thankful that we, in the western world, are for the most part free from the kinds of oppression that are common elsewhere, I was thinking on a more personal level. For many years, I suffered from what has been identified as betrayal trauma. As a result, I clung to a root of bitterness that gave me a sense of stability. I was afraid that if I let go and let myself trust again, I would be completely blown away and destroyed. Several months ago, as God began to gently loosen my grip on that root of bitterness, I pictured it this way…

IMG_3461

For some of us, art can be a creative and healthy way to deal with trauma. My daughter, whose own journey toward freedom included an art therapy course, illustrated the words of American author and activist, Glennon Doyle, in this beautiful expression.

Melaina's art journaling - freedom 2

Regardless of how confined we are by the present health restrictions or those yet to come, I want to live 2022 in the fullness of the freedom from that I have finally found! I would be remiss, however, if I didn’t also point out that true freedom is found by surrendering our lives to the almighty Creator of the universe. Galatians 5:1 tells us, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” and 2 Corinthians 3:17 says, “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”

Have you ever chosen a word to inspire or guide you in a new year? What would your one word for 2022 be?

What are your style adjectives?

/ edebock / 7 Comments

LogoWords are powerful. Words can build us up or knock us down. Words can also help us build a wardrobe and create outfits that say what we want to say about ourselves.

Several years ago, I chose three adjectives to describe my style… classy, confident, and comfortable. I’ve since added two more… casual and creative. The fact that they all start with the letter C makes them easy to remember, but that was simply a coincidence. Every time I get dressed, even if I’m not going anywhere that day, I stand in front of the mirror and run through those five adjectives in my mind. I’m happiest with my outfit if it ticks all five boxes. I’ve also used these words to help me weed garments out of my closet that probably didn’t belong there in the first place and to help me make wiser purchases.

Once in awhile, there are, of course, dressier events (or at least there were before Covid) when casual doesn’t work to describe the look I’m going for, but even on those occasions I use the other four adjectives to guide my outfit choices.

One of my fashion goals in the past couple of years has been to add more colour to my wardrobe, but since I still gravitate toward neutrals I’m not ready to make colourful one of my adjectives. Besides, you don’t want too many style adjectives. I would suggest three to five.

So, here’s an exercise for you. Below is a list of 48 adjectives. Look them over and choose three to five that describe what you would like your wardrobe to say about you. Then, share them in the comment section below. If the words you want aren’t on the list, feel free to choose different ones, but the English teacher in me says please don’t use boring words like nice or pretty. For this to be effective, you want your words to be more specific than those.

minimalistic             sophisticated            fun                      eclectic

bold                        sporty                   elegant                  edgy

trendy                   sexy                     classic                   tailored   

whimsical                glamorous                chic                     feminine 

artistic                 polished                 coordinated              cute

funky                    stylish                 dressy                   outdoorsy

relaxed                  graceful                 unique                   quirky

confident                preppy                   bohemian                 classy

colourful                approachable             lively                   creative

strong                  fierce                   youthful                 vibrant

casual                    current                  responsible              authentic   

cool                     happy                    modest                   soft     

Screen Shot 2021-05-19 at 8.46.05 PMEvery one of us is unique and I can’t wait to hear which adjectives you choose!

Languishing

/ edebock / 5 Comments

Last September, six months into the current pandemic, I wrote about hitting the Covid-19 wall. I got over that wall, as I knew I probably would, but every once in awhile the feeling returns. Today I learned a new word for what I, and probably many of you, have been experiencing. Apparently, we’re languishing. 

The dictionary describes languishing as losing or lacking vitality, growing weak or feeble, or suffering from being forced to remain in an unpleasant place or situation. Sound familiar? I thought so!

A recent article in The New York Times calls this “the neglected middle child of mental health”. We’re not depressed, but neither are we flourishing. “Languishing is a sense of stagnation and emptiness. It feels as if you’re muddling through your days, looking at your life through a foggy windshield. And it might be the dominant emotion of 2021.”

Screen Shot 2021-04-24 at 12.56.25 PM

As a lover of words, I’m glad to have found one that accurately describes how I’ve been feeling. I’m an introvert. I don’t mind solitude, but sometimes too much of a good thing is just too much. There are days when I get up in the morning and the hours seem to stretch out endlessly in front of me; days when I wonder how I’m going to fill those hours. My life hasn’t ground to a complete standstill, of course, but like everyone else’s, it looks a lot different than it did at the beginning of 2020. I’m missing many of the things that once filled my calendar. 

According to the New York Times article, “Part of the danger is that when you’re languishing, you might not notice the dulling of delight or the dwindling of drive. You don’t catch yourself slipping slowly into solitude; you’re indifferent to your indifference.” Perhaps identifying the feeling and giving it a name is an important step toward doing something about it. 

Back in January, when my online friend, Sue Burpee, who writes the blog High Heels in the Wilderness, was languishing (I don’t know if she knew that that was what she was doing) she wrote a post entitled Just One Thing… Every Day. In it, she wrote about asking herself, “What productive thing should I achieve today?” One thing a day became her plan; one that I’ve tried to adopt.

I already had a daily routine and I knew that I was accomplishing something useful every day even if it was just making sure that there were meals on the table, but I felt like I was in a rut with no end in sight. I was definitely languishing! Trying to add one different thing to my usual routine every day has helped. Yesterday it was baking four dozen muffins, today it’s writing this unplanned blog post. Thirteen months into the pandemic, it’s easy to focus on all the things we’re missing. Trying to do something outside my usual routine, especially something that feels productive, is at least a partial antidote. 

Still, if you happen to see me and ask how I’m doing, instead of saying “Great” or “Fine”, I might just say “I’m languishing!”

More about flats

/ edebock / Leave a comment

Screen Shot 2021-03-17 at 10.15.26 AM

What a strange language English is! Take the word flat, for example. In Britain, a flat is what we in North America would call an apartment. Flat can mean smooth and even, without bumps and indentations. It can be a musical note or a piece of stage scenery. We can be flat broke, lie flat on our backs, or turn someone down flat. Today is Fashion Friday, however, so once again we’re talking about shoes, ballet flats in particular. 

LogoThe ballet flat, a timeless, polished, and quietly chic style of footwear, was inspired by the dance slippers worn by ballerinas in France in the mid-18th century. It was French film actress, Brigitte Bardot, who would ultimately transform the ballet slipper into it’s present day form. Once trained as a ballet dancer, Bardot asked French footwear designer, Rose Repetto, to design a pair of flats for her that were as flexible as ballet slippers, but softer and more comfortable. Bardot wore the now-iconic style in her 1956 film, And God Created Woman. 

Fashion trends come and go, but the ballet flat has remained a wardrobe staple for women for nearly 70 years. Other famous fans of the tried-and-true style have included Audrey Hepburn, Rita Hayworth, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, Princess Diana, Michelle Obama, and Meghan Markle. 

As I mentioned in last week’s post, with spring comes lighter footwear including the ubiquitous ballet flat. Though these lightweight, flexible, and comfortable shoes are traditionally rounded at the toe, square-toed and pointy pairs can also be found. Apart from highly formal, black tie events, ballet flats are suited to almost any occasion from the office to a party. They are, of course, perfect as part of an everyday casual outfit. I would not, however, suggest wearing them when you plan to do a lot of walking as they don’t provide adequate support for that.

And now for a few styling tips: 

  • Avoid tights and socks. Ballet flats look best over bare feet. 
  • Show some skin. Ballet flats look most flattering when your ankles or lower legs are showing. They look great with dresses, skirts (especially loose, flowy styles), and cropped pants. 
  • Simple ballet flats also look great with skinny jeans or leggings. 
  • If you want to create the illusion of longer legs, choose a simple nude pair. 

IMG_2237

Wearing my blue suede shoes!

What is a shacket?

/ edebock / 5 Comments

Logo

I’m a self-professed word nerd. I love words and I’m always delighted when I learn a new one. My latest new word is shacket. 

Shirt + Jacket = Shacket

Maybe I’m the last one to the party because now that I’m looking, I’m seeing the word all over the place in advertising. In simple terms, a shacket is a cross between a shirt and a jacket. Usually slightly oversized, it’s heavier than a regular shirt, but lighter than a winter coat. Some retailers refer to them as shirt-jackets or overshirts. Whatever we choose to call it, a shacket is a perfect layering piece for fall, winter, spring or even a cool summer evening. It can also be worn under an overcoat in winter. 

While the word is new enough that it doesn’t appear in most dictionaries, the garment is not. In fact, the one I’m wearing here is more than 40 years old!

IMG_2060

Shackets are worn by both men and women and this one originally belonged to my Grandpa who passed away early in 1980. It was handed down to my older brother and ended up hanging in the cabin that my parents built overlooking a little lake northeast of Yellowknife. My brother may have worn it some, but whenever I visited the cabin it was I who wore it. When my parents left the north, my mother, knowing how much I loved wearing Grandpa’s old shirt-jacket, brought it to me and it’s been my campfire jacket ever since. It usually stays in the trailer year round. With a hole in one elbow and a slightly tattered cuff, it’s a little worse for wear, but I still love it. 

IMG_2066

In keeping with our pandemic desire for casual comfortable clothing, shackets have been very popular this fall and winter and they’re a trend that isn’t likely to disappear anytime soon. Though my shacket is 100% wool, most of the ones sold today are made of a cozy wool blend. Since I only wear Grandpa’s for camping, I may just have to add another one to my wardrobe! I especially like the colour and length of this BB Dakota Eldridge version. It also has side pockets.

9021

A quick online search will result in many others like these two. 

 

Digging deeper!

/ edebock / 2 Comments

LogoNow that winter has arrived, challenging myself to wear skirts and dresses to church every Sunday has resulted in me digging much deeper into my closet. Last Sunday morning, the temperature was -10ºC (14F), a strong wind was blowing, and it was snowing. Clearly, dressing warm was a priority. 

IMG_1855

I started with a camel coloured pencil skirt that I bought in early 2013, just before we left for a teaching term in China. Named for it’s long, slim shape, a pencil skirt is a timeless garment that never goes out of fashion. It’s a basic wardrobe piece that many different outfits can be built around. In addition to this one, I have navy and grey pencil skirts that both date back to my teaching days. 

I wore the same tall brown boots and patterned top that were part of last week’s outfit. Though only barely visible in the photo, I wore a pair of dark brown leggings under the skirt, partly for warmth, but also because the skirt wasn’t quite long enough to cover the top of my boots and I didn’t want a sliver of bare skin breaking up the look. Next, I added my cozy Checkmate Jacket from cabi’s Fall 2019 collection which you’ve seen on the blog a couple of times before. 

IMG_1858

Costume jewelry can be a fun and inexpensive way to finish off an outfit. The name dates back to the early 20th century and simply reflects the use of the word “costume” to refer to what we now call an “outfit”. To complete Sunday’s “costume”, I chose a pair of dangly earrings and a simple bead necklace. The beads are made from coconut shell. We spent the summer of 2011 as short term missionaries on the Pacific island of Saipan and it was there that I purchased the necklace from a Chamorro woman who made them to sell to tourists. The Chamorro are the indigenous people of the Northern Mariana Islands. 

Now that winter has arrived, I’m not sure that I’ll continue wearing skirts and dresses to church every week, but it’s been fun digging deeper into my closet and coming up with new ways to style some of my older pieces. 

 

Chinos

/ edebock / 8 Comments

LogoI finally went clothes shopping this week! To be more truthful, we were in the city for an appointment and I went into one clothing store. Just one!

After weeding several things out of my closet that should never have made the cut when I did my seasonal closet switch last fall, I identified a couple of significant holes in my summer wardrobe. As I mentioned two Friday’s ago, I have lots to wear when the weather is hot, but where we live I need things that are suitable for cooler summer days like the ones we’ve been having recently. One thing that I clearly needed was a couple of pairs of pants that would be warmer than my shorts and capris, but cooler than jeans.

Though I don’t shop for clothes online, the internet is a great place to do some scouting, especially during these days of Covid-19 when I don’t want to spend a lot of time browsing. I’d much prefer to go into a store, buy what I want, and leave again without lingering. When I knew that we’d be going to the city, I checked out the Mark’s website in advance and decided that their chinos might be just what I was looking for. Chinos are a nice middle ground between dress pants and jeans for both men and women.

The first thing I did when I entered the store was check to see if the fitting rooms were open. If I couldn’t try the pants on, there’d be no point in me even looking at them. Thankfully, a limited number of them were in use and there weren’t a lot of customers in the store so I didn’t even have to wait in line.

IMG_1063

Finding pants that fit well is often a struggle for me, but Mark’s slim-fitting, tapered leg chinos were perfect for my boyish figure. The toughest decision was which of the several colours to choose! I settled on two pairs; one in a light tan called Stone and the other in a dark Olive. Both will be very versatile. I’m showing you the light pair today, but I’m sure that the others will show up on the blog sometime soon. The bottom hem is meant to be rolled to ankle length, but they can also be worn down.

IMG_1054

I didn’t realize until after we’d finished taking the pictures that I’d forgotten to put on any lipstick, so this is my au naturel, at home look! Actually, I’d just got back from having several vials of blood taken at the local hospital, so perhaps I was even a bit paler than usual!

Being a word nerd, I couldn’t help doing a bit of research to find out how chinos got their name and what it actually meant. Apparently, the word was first used to describe khaki coloured military trousers that were worn during the Spanish American war of 1898. They were made from a cotton twill fabric that was sourced from China, so the name came from the fact that Chino is the Spanish word for Chinese. Thankfully, my new pants, which are made of a stretch cotton blend, were not made in China as one of my fashion goals for this year is to avoid buying Chinese products as much as possible. Of course, I have no idea where the fabric came from. As I’ve mentioned before, being a truly ethical shopper is very difficult, but I try.

The power of the written word

/ edebock / 8 Comments

The Bible has a lot to say about how we ought to use our words. The book of Proverbs is full of wise sayings about the power of the tongue.

The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.  Proverbs 17:27-28
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.  Proverbs 12:18

feather-pen-vector-546939It was English novelist and playwright Edward Bulwer-Lytton who, in 1839, wrote “The pen is mightier than the sword.”

Today, when most of us are holed up at home waiting out the Covid-19 pandemic, the written word is being used more than ever. We FaceTime and we Zoom, but we also use written platforms like Facebook and Twitter to connect with one another.

For some of us, writing is our preferred method of communication. We find it easy, but others may struggle to express themselves clearly. Without the visual and auditory clues that go along with face-to-face communication, misunderstandings can happen very easily. We definitely need to cut one another a bit of slack.

For example, a friend recently responded to something that I said on Facebook with a comment that could easily have been taken in two completely different ways. I had no way of knowing whether it was written in jest or meant to be extremely hurtful. If we had been talking face-to-face, I would have been able to tell based on her body language, facial expression, volume, and/or tone of voice. To tell you the truth, I still don’t know what her actual intent was, but because I know her and I don’t think of her as a mean person, I gave her the benefit of the doubt and assumed that, even if it fell a bit flat, her response was meant to be funny. Had I concluded that she was being nasty and responded in kind, I could have easily destroyed a relationship!

I love a good online conversation where people can express their views, have them heard, and willingly listen to the views of others. Unfortunately, however, what could have been a meaningful dialogue often becomes nothing more than a battle of words. Why is that? What can we do to prevent hurt feelings and misunderstandings? I have a few suggestions. If you have others, please add them to the comment section below.

  1. If you disagree with something that someone else has written, don’t react immediately. Take time to think about it first. Is there any truth in what they’ve written? Did they actually mean what you thought they meant? If you’re not sure, ask for clarification instead of immediately going on the defensive.
  2. Avoid getting sucked into arguments. Sadly, some people are willing to go toe-to-toe online in ways they’d never dream of doing face-to-face.
  3. Understand that your sense of humour isn’t universal and that, without cues like facial expressions and tone of voice, what is intended to be funny might not come across that way.
  4. Don’t comment on someone’s spelling or grammar. Sometimes the English teacher in me wants to take a red pen to the screen, but this is just plain rude! It’s also a tactic that’s often used by commenters who simply want to belittle someone they disagree with.
  5. Edit your responses before you post them. (There’s that English teacher again!) Read over what you’ve written. Does it actually say what you want it to say? Is it clear or could it be open to more than one interpretation?
  6. Distinguish between fact and opinion. Just as we should all know the difference between a news article and an editorial, we need to be clear when we’re the writer. If you’re declaring something to be a fact, be prepared to back it up. If it’s opinion, say so and remember that everyone is entitled to have one even if it’s different from yours. What a boring world it would be if we all agreed on everything!
  7. Remember, posting online is the same as speaking in public. If you don’t want something to come back and bite you, don’t say it online!
  8. Don’t be that person who always has to have the last word.
  9. Don’t drink and tweet! If you’re impaired in any way, whether it be from lack of sleep, a fight with your partner, or one too many drinks, you run the risk of saying something that you’ll regret. Resist the urge and wait until you’re in a better frame of mind.

Ansanm… together

/ edebock / Leave a comment

Tim DeTellis is President at New Missions, a ministry started by his parents in 1983 when they set up five tents on the Leogane plain in Haiti and started holding church services. Tim was 11 years old at the time. From that humble beginning, New Missions has grown to include 35 churches and schools as well as medical clinics in both Haiti and the Dominican Republic. In addition, a Bible school and a professional trade school prepare graduates of the New Missions schools to support their families and become leaders in their communities. As a lover of words, I was touched by something that Tim recently posted on Facebook.

“Ansanm means together in Haitian Creole. Togetherness makes life better because you have community to share life with. When I lived in Haiti I saw the strength of togetherness as villagers would gather at the shoreline to help pull in the fishing nets. It took many hands and the strength of togetherness to survive.” 

84136281_1519572048193605_2583547266631467008_o

photo: Tim DeTellis

We’re not meant to live life alone. Married or single, we were made for community. We’re meant to do life together… ansanm.

The Bible says, “How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!” Psalm 133:1 and “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor.” Ecclesiastes 4:9

While there are times that togetherness can try our patience, maybe even drive us a little bit crazy, there are definite advantages to being part of a group whether it be immediate family, physical neighbourhood, church, workplace, or even an online community.

  • it’s safer
  • it’s mutually supportive
  • it provides comfort in times of trouble or loss
  • we can share knowledge and learn from one another
  • we’re inspired by others
  • we receive advice and encouragement from others
  • we cheer one another on and celebrate together
  • we can share resources
  • it provides accountability
  • it’s fun

Not only do we need other people, but they need us. Someone needs you! Who are you doing life with?

One word for 2020

/ edebock / 5 Comments

Three years ago, as part of a ministry that I was involved in, I was asked to choose one word to inspire or guide me in the coming year and to choose a scripture verse to go with it. As a lover of words, this was a perfect assignment for me and one that I’ve repeated each year since then. My word for 2017 was Still, for 2018 I chose Grace, and last year my word was Inspire. There’s actually a whole #OneWord365 movement on the internet urging members to choose just one word to focus on every day, all year long; a word that sums up who they want to be or how they want to live.

The weekly Bible study that I do with a small group of women from my church pointed me toward the word that I’ve chosen for 2020: Bold. The study, Legacy: How One Ordinary Life Can Make an Eternal Difference with Jackie Green and Lauren Green McAfee, points out that being bold is vital to leaving a spiritual legacy. According to the study, “being bold doesn’t mean breaking rules or social conventions just for the sake of being a rule breaker. It’s not about demanding your own way. It’s not about having a sense of entitlement. Rather, biblical boldness is about speaking the truth even when it’s unpopular. The bold act without worrying about what other people think or say because they have confidence in following a higher standard. The bold are willing to break with tradition.”

The dictionary defines bold as showing an ability to take risks; confident and courageous.

“Bold people stand out from the group. They are confident, courageous, and directed.” says Kevin Daum, author, columnist, entrepreneurship coach, marketer and speaker in a post entitled 7 Things Really Bold People Do. “People who choose to be bold are inspiring not just because they get big things accomplished, but because they also instigate growth, progress, and movement for themselves and others around them.” That definitely resonated with me considering that my word for the past year was Inspire.

The Bible verse that I selected to go with this year’s word is Proverbs 28:1. “The wicked flee though no one pursues, but the righteous are as bold as a lion.” Known as the king of the beasts, the mighty lion is regal and fearless. With a roar that can be heard from more than 5 miles (8 km) away, he’s a symbol of fearlessness, strength and invincibility.

bold-1024x1024

So how do you blend boldness with grace? How do you act boldly without being abrasive? How do you speak up for what you believe in or what you know to be true without sounding arrogant and turning people off? These are the questions that I’m wrestling with as I enter the new year.

I want to have the boldness of the early disciples who shared their faith in spite of great opposition. I want to have the courage to confront injustice and stand up for the downtrodden. I want to be bold enough to reach out to the woman weeping in the ladies room at the cancer clinic instead of just saying a silent prayer for her.  

So how am I, a naturally shy and introverted person, going to learn to act with greater boldness? One recommendation that I read suggested that I pretend that I’m already bold, ask myself what I’d do if I was, and then act accordingly. That’s what I’m determined to do this coming year.

print94 (1)

What about you? Can you think of one word to inspire or guide you in the new year?

Screen Shot 2019-12-24 at 9.50.47 AM