Words

Brave or resilient?

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As a cancer patient, I’ve often been told that I’m brave. I know that people mean well, but that descriptor has never sat very well with me. To me, brave is the firefighter who enters a burning building to save lives or the person who jumps into deep water to rescue someone in danger of drowning. Bravery is defined as the mental strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty. It’s often impulsive or heroic. That doesn’t describe me or my thirteen year journey with neuroendocrine cancer.

Recently, a person whose opinion I value highly told me, “You’re so resilient!” and that word rang true to me. Resilience is a long-term process best described as the ability to endure, adapt, and survive adversity and recover from difficult experiences.

Those who know me well know that I’m a self-professed word nerd. Words matter to me. For more than a decade, the word stable, as in “no evidence of new or progressive disease” which was the final line on my latest CT scan report, has been a favourite word of mine. Now resilient has become another favourite!

So, how does a person build resilience? Becoming resilient is a lifelong process, not a one-time event. Life is rarely easy for anyone. Most of us experience a variety of difficult and upsetting events and circumstances over our lifetimes and I’m certainly no exception. Long before I was diagnosed with cancer, I endured a series of other tragedies and traumas, including the loss of a preschool daughter to leukemia. In each case, I chose to keep putting one foot in front of the other and living life to the fullest extent possible. That wasn’t easy, it wasn’t brave, and I couldn’t have done it alone, but it did help prepare me for life with an incurable cancer. I learned to accept circumstances that I couldn’t change and I also learned to depend on the God who loves me and who promised to take care of me.

In 2 Corinthians 4:8–9, the apostle Paul, who suffered many hardships, wrote “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” That’s resilience!

One word for 2026

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At the beginning of each new year, I like to choose one word to inspire or guide me throughout the year ahead as well as a scripture verse to go along with it. For the past two years, my word was hope, a word that continues to inspire me to hold fast to a God who is who He says He is and can do what He says He will do.

Although I often find myself pondering what my new word should be during the final days of December, I’ve known since late summer or early fall what my one word for 2026 would be.

Joy!

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines joy as “a feeling of great pleasure and happiness” but joy is much more than that. Joy is a choice. It’s a a deep, enduring contentment that isn’t dependent on circumstances.  It’s a deeper emotion than happiness and often comes from having a sense of purpose or from meaningful relationships with other people. Happiness is fleeting, but joy sees beauty even during trying times. My goal this year is to be intentional about looking for moments of joy each day.

There were many Bible verses that I could have chosen to go along with my one word for 2026, but I settled on Romans 15:13 because it so beautifully ties this year’s word with my last one.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Have you chosen a word for 2026? I’d love to know what it is.

Elderly? Not yet!

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I was a bit taken aback when a fellow blogger who’s a few months younger than I am recently referred to herself as elderly. I turned 73 earlier this week. Maybe I’m in denial, but I’ve never thought of myself as elderly! I still don’t. 

I recently read a trashy novel entitled The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel about a group of doddering old people living in a seniors home. I was  bothered by the fact that most of the “elderly” characters were younger than I am now! Did the author really think that that was an accurate representation of people in their 60s and 70s today? 

I don’t mind being called a senior. I’m happy to accept the discounts that go along with that and I certainly don’t mind the fact that the government has been paying me a monthly pension since I turned 65, but that doesn’t make me elderly.

This article explains the difference between senior and elderly in a way that sheds light on why I feel the way I do. “While “senior” is used to describe an age group, “elderly” refers to a matter of capability.” Senior denotes a person’s actual age, generally 65 or older, while elderly indicates diminishing ability due to aging. I may not be quite as spry as I once was, but I’m not there yet! In fact, I plan to go hiking today. 

It’s funny how our concept of age changes as we get older. When I was a child and my grandmother was younger than I am now, I certainly thought that she was OLD! When I started my teaching career, several colleagues who were nearing retirement seemed very old to me. Now I’m significantly older than they were then!

My grandmother when she was younger than I am now. 

Aging is a natural process and one we ought to embrace. One would hope that with age, we’ve gained experience and wisdom. It’s just that word elderly that I’m not ready to embrace yet!

One word for 2025

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Happy New Year!

For each of the past eight years I’ve chosen one word to inspire or guide me in the new year as well as a scripture verse to go along with it, but this year will be different. Instead of choosing a new word for 2025, I’m going to keep my one word for 2024 for another year.

Hope!

Hope has been such a significant and meaningful word for me for the past year that I’m not ready to let it go and focus on another.

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines hope as “a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen”. That meaning is definitely part of the reason that I originally chose it as my one word. There are many things that I hope for in 2025. I hope that my family is healthy and happy. I hope that my own health remains stable and that hubby and I can make the trips that we are planning. I hope that the renos on our house that will begin in a couple of weeks turn out well. Yes, I hope for many things, but there is a hope that is so much greater than any of these.

The Biblical word hope is much more than just wishful thinking. From the Hebrew word tikvah, it’s an expectation, a certainty, a strong expression of faith. It’s confidence that God is who He says He is and can do what He says He will do. That’s the hope that I hold fast to; a hope that doesn’t depend on my circumstances.

Last year, I had a difficult time choosing a Bible verse to go along with my one word because there were so many possibilities. I finally settled on two of them. Romans 15:13 says “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” and the first part of Hebrews 6:19 reads “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.”  This year, even though I’m keeping my one word for another year, I decided to choose a different verse to go with it. Again, I pondered several possibilities and finally chose Romans 12:12. 

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What do you hope for in 2025?

Have you chosen a word for the new year? 

Dressed to the nines

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LogoWe’ve just come through a season where I heard the phrase “dressed to the nines” used several times to refer to people who dressed very elegantly to attend holiday parties. As a lover of words, I began to wonder where that idiom came from and why we say “dressed to the nines” instead of to “the eights” or “the tens”? As often happens, curiosity sent me looking for answers!

There are several theories about the origin of the phrase. For example, one popular one says that it came from the nine yards of fabric that a tailor needed to make a suit. Apparently, however, a very nice three piece suit can actually be made from only four or five yards. The real origin of the saying is unknown, but it’s believed to have originated in the late 19th century. It’s most likely simply an extension of an earlier phrase, “to the nines”, which meant “perfectly” or “to the highest standard”. That phrase had been around since the 1700s, but its early use wasn’t specific to clothing.

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There are actually several English idioms that include the number nine. A stitch in time saves nine, we go the whole nine yards, or perhaps we’re on cloud nine. There must be significance to the number, but that’s another rabbit trail that I won’t go down today! Regardless of its origin or the meaning of the number nine, “dressed to the nines” is commonly used to describe someone who is dressed to perfection and looks their absolute best.

New Year’s Eve is often a time to dress to the nines, but that certainly wasn’t me this year. While the final hours of the year often find us either on the dance floor or babysitting so that our adult children can enjoy the night out, this year was different. We enjoyed a quiet party for two at home. Since El Niño has gifted us with an unusually mild winter, we spent the early hours of the evening bundled up by our backyard firepit watching the last light of the year fade into darkness.

Later, we went indoors to watch a couple of movies, sip some wine and nibble on party food. I crawled into bed just as the clock struck twelve!

What about you? Did you “dress to the nines” and go out to celebrate the arrival of the New Year?

One word for 2024

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At the beginning of each year since 2017, I’ve chosen one word to inspire or guide me throughout the new year as well as a scripture verse to go along with it. My word for 2023 was contentment and the Bible verse, Philippians 4:12b. “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” I wanted to be able to say with the apostle Paul that I had learned to be content regardless of my circumstances. 

Everything went pretty well for about eight months. In late March, hubby came through his prostate surgery well. We had a good summer season. We camped, hiked, kayaked and played lots of golf. Everything seemed to be going well and contentment came easily. Then things started to unravel. I worried about a close family member who was going through a very difficult time. Hubby and I encountered more issues with our health and life seemed to become a long series of trips to the city for medical appointments. I no longer came to the end of a day with a feeling of quiet happiness and satisfaction. Instead, I was stressed! Tense! I berated myself for having had the audacity to choose a word like contentment! How could I possibly be content in my present circumstances? Thankfully, time, prayer, wise counsel, and an excellent massage therapist helped get me back on track. Now that the year has ended, I think I can say that I’ve come closer to being able to be content in any and every situation. I’m definitely still a work in progress though! 

It was during this dark time that I settled on my one word for 2024. 

Hope! 

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines hope as “a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen”. That meaning is definitely part of the reason that I chose hope as my word for the new year. I hope that 2024 is a good year for all of us. I hope that my family is happy and healthy. I hope that the embolization that I’ll be having to tackle the tumour on my liver is successful and that my cancer doesn’t grow or spread any further. I hope that hubby and I can travel more in the coming year (and not just to medical appointments!) Yes, I hope for many things, but there is a hope that is so much greater than any of these. 

This year, while my word came to me easily, choosing a scripture verse to go with it was more difficult because there were so many possibilities. I finally settled on two of them, Romans 15:13 and Hebrews 6:19a.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

and

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.” 

The Biblical word hope is so much more than just wishful thinking. From the Hebrew word tikvah, it’s an expectation and a strong expression of faith. It’s a certainty that we can hold fast to. It’s confidence that God is who He says He is and can do what He says He will do. My hope, my certainty, is that some glorious day when the trials of this life are over, I will see Him face-to-face. He guaranteed it! This hope gives me strength to face whatever happens between now and then. It isn’t dependent on my circumstances. As I learn to depend more and more on this tikvah hope, the contentment that I yearned for in 2023 should become more and more real in my life!

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What do you hope for in 2024?

Have you chosen a word for the new year? 

 

Styling an old favourite

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Logo by SamThis week I’m featuring a garment that has been in my wardrobe since my teaching days. Far from new when I retired in 2007, it’s over 20 years old and now qualifies as vintage in the fashion world. Although I don’t wear it very often, I keep it because I love it and on those occasions when I do pull it out, as I did for church last Sunday, it feels like I’m wearing something new. 

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I’m not actually sure what to call it. Since it can be worn alone, I guess it qualifies as a dress, but I’ve usually worn it over a blouse. As a child, I might have called it a jumper, but according to the dictionary, a jumper is actually “a collarless sleeveless dress, typically worn over a blouse”. Jumper is also a confusing word in the world of fashion. This definition is North American, but elsewhere, especially in the UK, a jumper is what we would call a sweater. 

Whatever we call it, this garment is versatile. Not only can it be worn without a blouse underneath, but it can also be worn without the belt. Styled very differently, it first appeared on the blog in this post written over 11 years ago, long before I added a weekly fashion post. 

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Today’s photos were taken very hastily as I was freezing. It was only 3ºC (37.4ºF) outside, but I wanted to take advantage of the last of our beautiful leaves before they were buried in snow! Sure enough, there was snow on the ground when we got up the very next morning! If I hadn’t been so cold, I probably would have taken a moment to ensure that the front wasn’t puckered. 

The Classic Blouse is from cabi’s Fall 2019 collection and was bought second-hand as were the cute booties. 

And now, this morning, I’m off to the grand opening of the new Uniqlo store in Southgate Mall in South Edmonton! Maybe more about that next Friday. 

Book of the month – May 2023

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When it came time to write this month’s book post, I couldn’t decide which of two historical novels I wanted to feature, so I took the easy way out and wrote about them both!

The Letter Home

Rachael English

hbg-title-9781472264701-63.jpgRachael English is a novelist and a presenter on Ireland’s most popular radio programme, Morning Ireland. In her most recent novel, inspired by true events, the lives of three remarkable women are interwoven across time.

While back home in County Clare on Ireland’s west coast, Jessie Daly, whose life has recently fallen apart, agrees to help an old friend research what happened in that area during the terrible famine of the 1840s. Meanwhile in Boston, lawyer Kaitlin Wilson, after suffering a tragedy of her own, decides to research her family history. She knows only that her ancestors left Ireland for Boston in the 19th century. Separated by an ocean, and totally unknown to one another, the two women are drawn into the remarkable story of a brave young mother named Bridget Moloney and the terrible suffering that she and her little daughter, Norah, endured during the famine.

Even on a busy weekend celebrating the birthdays of two of my grandchildren, I had a hard time putting this book down! Perhaps I connected so strongly with the story because I’ve recently been sorting through a box of old family photos, inherited from my mother, and trying to correctly label them before the identities of the people in them are forever lost in the mists of time. Like Jessie and Kaitlin, I’ve taken to the internet to find out more about these ancestors of mine and their lives, but perhaps that should be a story for a different post!

If you enjoy historical fiction or genealogy is your thing, this is definitely a book for you. I enjoyed it so much that I’ve now loaded one of English’s earlier novels, The American Girl, onto my Kindle for future reading.

The Dictionary of Lost Words

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Knowing that I’m a lover of words and a strong advocate of equal rights for women, my daughter recommended that I read this one. Australian novelist, Pip Williams, masterfully weaves a fictional story into and around the true historical events and people involved in compiling the first edition of the Oxford English Dictionary in the late 1800s and early 1900s.

The only child of a widowed father, Esme spends her early childhood in the Scriptorium, a converted garden shed in Oxford where her father and a team of dedicated lexicographers collect and compile words for the dictionary. From her place under the sorting table she collects stray word slips dropped or discarded by the men and hides them in a small trunk that she labels “The Dictionary of Lost Words”. As she grows up, she begins to realize that not all words are considered appropriate for inclusion in the dictionary, particularly words pertaining to the experiences of women and common folk; words that were considered coarse or vulgar, spoken but not usually written. And so she begins her own collection of words by seeking out the lower-class, less educated people and listening to their everyday speech.

A book about words might sound dreadfully boring to some, but The Book of Lost Words is much more than that. The years during which the Oxford English Dictionary was being compiled coincided with the women’s suffrage movement in England as well as World War I and both have a part to play in the story. More than just a book about words, it’s a book about love, loss, the roles of women, the meaning of service, and a book that asks the important question, whose words matter?

Rethinking my style adjectives

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Logo by SamChoosing three to five adjectives to describe your personal style can be very helpful in building a cohesive wardrobe and creating outfits that say what you want to say about yourself.

Several years ago, I chose three adjectives to describe my style… classy, confident, and comfortable. Later, I added two more… casual and creative. The fact that they all started with the letter C was entirely coincidental, but it made them easy to remember! Lately, though, I’ve been rethinking the last one.

Even though my lifestyle calls for casual clothing most of the time, when I look in the mirror, I still want what I’m wearing to be classy. I achieve that by wearing clothes that are tasteful, well-made, and in most cases, somewhat timeless. It’s also important that they’re comfortable and fit well. I think it goes without saying that we’d all like to feel confident in our appearance. I believe that when we’re true to our own personal style, confidence will be a byproduct.

But what about creative? Why have I decided to toss that one out and what am I replacing it with?

To me, creative implies colourful and unconventional. Although she’s an extreme example, Iris Apfel comes to mind. I don’t mind a pop of colour or something with a slightly unique or unusual twist, but I’ve come to the conclusion that true creative style just isn’t me. Maybe it’s the introvert in me, but when I stray too far in that direction I don’t feel comfortable or confident. Instead, I feel self-conscious. Perhaps the desire for simplicity in style is why the coastal grandmother look that was all the rage last summer appealed to me so much.

Of course, it’s not essential that I have five style adjectives. Four would be fine, but as I thought about this, the word authentic came to mind and I knew that I’d found my new adjective. Merriam-Webster includes “true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character” as one meaning of the word and synonyms include “genuine” and “real“. To me, authentic style means not dressing to satisfy anyone but myself. It means wearing what feels like me. It means not wearing something simply because it’s a trend or because someone else thinks it looks good on me.

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So, from now on when I stand in front of the mirror, I’ll run through my five style adjectives… classy, confident, comfortable, casual, and authentic… and I’ll be happy with the outfit if it ticks all five boxes.

What about you? Have you ever chosen adjectives to describe your personal style. If not, check here for an exercise that will help you do that.

One word for 2023

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For each of the past six years I’ve chosen one word to inspire or guide me in the new year as well as a scripture verse to go along with it. My past words have been Still, Grace, Inspire, Bold, Truth, and Freedom.

Little did I know when I chose Freedom as my word for 2022 what a contentious topic it would soon become here in Canada. At the beginning of January, I couldn’t possibly have imagined that less than two months later hordes of protesting truckers would close Canada/US border crossings and take control of the streets surrounding our capital buildings in Ottawa, all in the name of freedom. As I wrote at this time last year, there are really two kinds of freedom, freedom to and freedom from. The so-called Freedom Convoy was fighting for freedom from Covid-19 vaccination mandates. There is no doubt that the pandemic did, at least temporarily, curtail our freedom to travel, to gather in large groups, to celebrate special moments with those we love, and to enjoy many of the activities that we once took for granted, but in my opinion, the protesters were forgetting that with freedom comes responsibility. When I chose Freedom as my one word for 2022, it wasn’t Covid that I had in mind. I was thinking on a very personal level of freedom from trauma induced bitterness that had taken hold in my life.

When it came to choosing a new word for 2023, I considered several possibilities. When I first started thinking about this in late November, I was suffering from scanxiety. As I worried about whether or not my neuroendocrine cancer was spreading throughout my body and thought ahead to hubby’s upcoming prostate cancer surgery, I thought that perhaps Courage was the word I wanted. Once I learned the results of my most recent CT scans, however, that didn’t feel like the right word anymore. For several years I’ve considered choosing Intentional as my one word, but as I thought about that one I realized that I already live quite intentionally. I wanted a word that would give me something more to aspire to in the coming year. But what would that word be?

I thought about how good I feel at the end of a productive day, a day that has gone really well, and tried to come up with a word to describe that feeling. Surely that would be a good word for the coming year. Accomplish came to mind and I almost settled on it, but then I decided that it was too work or task oriented. I do feel great at the end of the day if I’ve accomplished a lot, but I also feel that way when we’ve spent the day hiking or paddling the kayak.

After pondering some more, I finally settled on the right word.

Contentment

According to the Collins English Dictionary, contentment is “a feeling of quiet happiness and satisfaction”. Perfect!

Once I’d finally settled on my word, choosing a scripture verse to go with it was easy. I knew right away that it would be Philippians 4:12b.

“I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.”

Whether my health continues to be stable or begins to deteriorate, whether the Covid pandemic is truly over or not, whatever my circumstances are in the coming year, I want to be able to say with the apostle Paul that I have learned to be content in any and every situation. As I plan my days, I’ll consider what I need to do to end each day with that feeling of quiet happiness and satisfaction and hopefully act accordingly.

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Have you ever chosen a word to inspire or guide you in a new year? What would your one word for 2023 be?