Faith

Clothing ourselves for Christmas and always

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LogoFor me, fashion is a hobby, not a passion. I definitely want to look my best and I have fun putting together the outfits I wear, but I’m more concerned with who I am as a person than what I look like. The Bible speaks of this in Colossians 3:12 where it says “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Verse 14 of the same chapter says “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

These thoughts seem particularly appropriate as we approach the busy Christmas season. There are lots of ways to show compassion and kindness at this time of year, whether it be making a donation to your local food bank or filling a shoebox for an underprivileged child, but what about patience? That can be a tough one, especially when you’re trying to navigate a busy shopping mall or you find yourself caught in the slowest line at Walmart while the harried cashier waits on a price check.

One of the ways that I try to deal with the busyness of the Christmas season without losing patience is to plan ahead. I’m almost completely finished my Christmas shopping and while I’m stuck at home over the next few days, I plan to decorate and do some Christmas baking. I’ve also made a list of the various Christmas events that we’ll be taking part in during December and I’ll be shopping my closet to put together outfits and accessories for each one. That way, when it comes time to dress for each event, I won’t have the stress of trying to figure out what to wear. Instead, I’ll be in the right frame of mind to put on the qualities of He whose birth we celebrate at Christmas!

Colossians 3;12-14

 

Still stable!

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Stable has become one of my favourite words! Not the kind you keep your horses in, but the word that my doctors use to tell me that my cancer has not grown or spread!

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I heard that word again today when I sat down with the doctor to discuss the results of the CT scans that I had back on August 21st. Waiting almost a month was difficult and I admit to having some episodes of scanxiety during that time. It was heaviest as I sat in the waiting room early this afternoon not knowing if the news would be bad or good. I had no reason to suspect that it would be bad; no symptoms to suggest that the tumours might be active or growing again, but the knowledge is always there that that day could come at any time.

When the doctor told us that everything continues to be stable, the load was lifted in an instant and I felt lighter than air! All the way home (a two hour drive) I felt as though, had my seatbelt not been fastened, I might have lifted right off my seat!

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And so I keep on hanging on, living life to the fullest, and praising the Lord!

 

The notion of “home”

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When and where are you truly at home?

Except for short stints of five months to a year spent living in Asia, I’ve lived in the same small Alberta town for more than four decades, but there’s always been deep within me a yearning to be somewhere else, to be traveling, to see new places. The dictionary calls it wanderlust.

When I did live overseas for a time, it sometimes felt almost surreal. I remember walking the streets of Funabashi, Japan shortly after our arrival there and marvelling that this place, so foreign, so different, and yet so fascinating was actually my home. I lived there!

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Funabashi

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The view from our apartment

A friend who has been an expat for almost six years, living in China, Cambodia, Vietnam, and now Mexico, recently said this: “I am very comfortable here, but every once in a while, say, once in six months, I will be out walking in my lovely colonial town, which looks nothing like what I grew up with, and all the sounds I hear are in a language which I did not grow up hearing, and it is like I am in some kind of strange dream place, and I wonder what is going on.” That got me thinking about the notion of “home.” What makes a place home and why is it that I always have that yearning to go somewhere else, to see someplace new?

I have a theory about why I feel this way. In the New King James Version of the Bible, 1 Peter 2:11 calls us “sojourners and pilgrims.” The New International Version translates it “foreigners and exiles.” The writer of Hebrews says that “we are looking for the city that is to come” (13:14), “longing for a better country—a heavenly one. (11:16) At best, we are temporary residents here. We are pilgrims on a journey. While there is much to be experienced and enjoyed along the way, I believe that there is deep within me a longing for that eternal home. That, I believe, is the source of my wanderlust, the reason that I could probably settle almost anyplace and yet not truly feel at home anywhere.

Interestingly, I was in the middle of sorting through my thoughts and had already started writing this post when I attended the funeral of a long time resident of our small community. Though she was only 71 years old, the lady who passed away had suffered debilitating illness and endured a great deal of pain in the final years of her life. In his message, entitled “Home Sweet Home”, the pastor told us of her readiness to go “home.” He referred to 1 Corinthians 5:1. “For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands.” Our bodies are but tents, temporary dwellings! Like refugees, we live in them until the time comes when we can go to a more permanent home.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not in any hurry to vacate my tent! In fact, with the help of medical professionals, I’m doing everything I can to keep it intact. Though life is often far from easy, it’s a wonderful thing to be able to enjoy all that we’ve been blessed with during our sojourn here on earth and I’m in no hurry to see that come to an end! I’ll have all of eternity to enjoy my heavenly home. In the meantime, I will continue to wander this globe, perhaps never feeling quite at home, but marvelling at all the good things that this life has to offer.  There is, after all, a lot of world that I haven’t yet seen!

Let your beauty shine through

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LogoAfter having our ceilings stripped and new stipple applied, then painting the living room, this week has been one of major house cleaning. If you had seen me in my painting duds or wearing old jeans and t-shirt while I applied furniture polish to practically every wood surface in the house, you would not have taken me for a fashion blogger. In fact, I’m quite sure I looked more like a fashion failure!

As these things tend to do, the work has taken longer and gone in different directions than we originally planned and while I try to post something on the blog at least twice a week, that hasn’t been happening. Suddenly it’s Friday again and I don’t have a new outfit or tidbit of fashion wisdom ready to share with you.

I have, however, been musing about something as I’ve applied oil to wood and polished it to a shine. The oil enhances the natural beauty of the wood. Similarly, what we wear only enhances the beauty that comes from within.

Stephanie Lahart, inspirational author of Overcoming Life’s Obstacles, puts it this way:

“Her outer beauty is just a bonus, but it is her inner beauty that’s most captivating. She’s loving, caring, kindhearted, empathetic, and genuine. She’s comfortable in her own skin, therefore, she’s able to compliment, celebrate, and build up others around her. She’s a quality woman with a strong sense of self! She doesn’t need the spotlight, because she is the light wherever she goes. Smart, confident, ambitious, and fearless… Beautifully created from the inside out.”

A woman like that can be dressed in rags (or painting clothes) and still be beautiful!

Scripture tells us:

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”           1 Peter 3:3-4

So, whatever you’re wearing today… pay someone a compliment, do something kind for someone else, put a smile on your face and let the beautiful woman you are shine through.

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I’ll be in the city for another cancer treatment and some scans next week, so I should have an update on that front, and I promise a more traditional fashion post next Friday.

Thankful for a root canal?

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“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

1 Thessalonians 5:8 is a scripture passage that can be very easily misunderstood. There are many things in life that I am not thankful for. Fortunately, I’m not told to be thankful for every situation, but rather in every situation. In even the most difficult circumstances of life, we can find things to be thankful for, whether it be the resources to handle the crisis or the support of family and friends through it.

That being said, I am actually thankful that early Monday morning I’m going to be having a root canal! How can that be? Thankful for a root canal? Am I crazy?

No, I would rather not have to have a root canal, but considering the other possibilities that crossed my mind after I discovered a lump on my gum a few weeks ago, I’m quite delighted that the problem is only an abscessed tooth and that the solution is as common as a root canal. You see, this is something that happens to ordinary mortals, not just cancer patients!

So, yes, as crazy as it sounds, I’m thankful for a root canal!

It isn’t going to be a simple procedure which is why it’s being done by an endodontist, a root canal specialist. The roots of this particular tooth are fused together. Apparently that’s not terribly uncommon, but it can make the procedure more complicated and it’s something my own dentist didn’t feel comfortable tackling. In spite of that, I’m still feeling

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Have you ever been thankful for something as crazy as a root canal?

What to do when life seems overwhelming

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What do you do when life seems overwhelming?

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Recent circumstances have resulted in us leaving the church that was our strong support system for many years. We’re living in the midst of a home renovation project gone very wrong and trying to figure out how to deal with that. I’m off to the city early next week to see a specialist about a lump growing on my gums that my dentist hasn’t been able to find the cause of. We’re moving into the busiest season of the year for me in one of the volunteer positions that I hold. And to top it off, we seem to be living through the winter that will never end.

You’ve probably lived through similar seasons. Maybe you’re there right now. You may be dealing with an enormous stressor such as job loss or the death of a loved one or it might simply be an accumulation of smaller aggravations that have left you feeling completely swamped.

So what should we do when life leaves us feeling like we’ve reached the end of our rope?

If you’re a young parent, you probably feel this way a lot of the time and with very good reason! I asked my daughter what her advice would be and her reply was, “In my case the answer is don’t bite off more than you can chew!” That’s good advice for all of us. Sometimes we’re the cause of our own stressful predicaments. We simply take on more than we can handle. None of us has an infinite amount of time available, so perhaps in those cases the answer is learning to prioritize, learning better time management skills, or simply learning to say No!

But what can we do when we’re overwhelmed by circumstances that are beyond our control? I’m reminded of a dear friend who often asks, “In the light of eternity, does this really matter?” Sometimes we need to take a step back and look at the situation from a wider perspective. Yes, the new ceiling surface that was applied throughout the main floor of our house on Saturday is a superb example of shoddy workmanship and will have to be redone. We’re not sure how or when that’s going to happen. As stressful and aggravating as that is, it isn’t life threatening and years down the road, it won’t seem as big a deal as it does right now.

The lump on my gum, however, could be a big deal. When you’re a cancer patient, any inexplicable lump or bump is reason for concern, but the same wise friend once reminded me that 99% of the things we worry about never come to pass and all the worrying in the world won’t prevent the other 1%.

Whether we’re overwhelmed by the busyness of life, legitimate concerns, or distressing circumstances that are not of our own making, there are things we can do to help alleviate stress when it threatens to overcome us. What works for me, might not necessarily work for you, but here are a few suggestions to try.

  1. Focus on getting through one day or even one hour at a time. Matthew 6:34 gives this wise advice, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.“
  2. Don’t skip meals. When I’m severely stressed my appetite is the first to go, but our bodies need fuel. Eat regularly to avoid low blood sugar, fatigue, and brain fog.
  3. Drink a cup of tea. My automatic response to crisis situations has long been to brew a pot of tea, but now studies conducted in the UK have actually shown that drinking a single cup of tea can significantly reduce anxiety levels after suffering a stressful experience.
  4. Escape. Go for a walk or a drive in the country, lose yourself in a good book, get out of the office over your lunch hour. Do whatever it takes to get away from the stressful situation even for a short time.
  5. Exercise. According to experts at the Mayo Clinic, exercise in almost any form acts as a stress reliever, providing a distraction from worry and boosting the production of endorphins, the brain’s feel-good neurotransmitters.
  6. Pray. Prayer is an age old stress reliever that doesn’t require a prescription! Taking a few quiet moments to pray can help you gain perspective and find peace in the midst of turmoil. When the situation is so overwhelming that you can’t even find the words to pray, remember that Romans 8:26 tells us that “We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.“
  7. Soak in a hot bath. Add a few drops of lavender oil which is commonly known for its relaxing effects on the body.
  8. Sleep. It may be difficult to quiet your mind enough to get to sleep when life seems overwhelming, but getting a good night’s rest should be a priority. A cup of chamomile tea half an hour before bedtime is widely regarded as a mild tranquilizer and sleep-inducer. Lavender oil can also be helpful here. Rub 2 or 3 drops on the palms of your hands and inhale deeply then wipe your palms on your pillow to leave a hint of lavender there.
  9. Don’t try to handle everything on your own. Delegate, ask for help, share your struggles. When stress doesn’t go away, and you’ve tried your best to manage it, you may need talk to a doctor or mental health professional about it. There’s absolutely no shame in that.

Sometimes it’s hard to be humble

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One of the characteristics of grace listed in yesterday’s post was “acts with humility, not pride.” As I pondered my One Word for 2018 and asked myself how I’m doing at becoming a woman of grace, I was also challenged to examine myself and wonder how I measure up in the area of humility.

The Bible has plenty to say about being humble. The book of Proverbs contains many warnings for those who refuse to put others before themselves and both the Old and New Testaments tell of blessings for those who do. Colossians 3:12 has become my life guide. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

There’s an old country and western song that says, “Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every way!” I’ve also heard it said that if you think you’re humble, you probably aren’t. So how can we know if we’re humble or not?

After much reading and pondering, I came up with the following 20 characteristics of a humble person. I’m sure it’s not exhaustive, but I think it’s a reasonably good checklist.

A humble person…

  1. is not boastful
  2. is able to set aside personal preferences for the sake of others
  3. treats others with respect
  4. is not easily offended
  5. is grateful for what they have
  6. is able to rejoice with others
  7. is not wise in their own eyes
  8. is teachable
  9. is able to seek advice or ask for help
  10. willingly serves other people without drawing attention to themselves
  11. accepts their own limitations
  12. accepts correction without becoming defensive
  13. takes responsibility for their actions and apologizes when wrong
  14. is merciful, forgiving quickly and not holding grudges
  15. doesn’t get frustrated with the weaknesses of others
  16. is self-controlled
  17. listens to others and doesn’t feel the need to speak their mind in every situation
  18. is comfortable allowing others to have centre stage
  19. doesn’t always have to be right
  20. doesn’t insist on their own way

In a “me first” world, it isn’t always easy to be humble and there are many misconceptions about what it means. In the same way that being gracious is not the same as being wishy-washy or weak-kneed, humility is not a sign of weakness. Being humble is not belittling or undervaluing oneself, nor is it an indication of poor self-esteem. Like grace, humility is actually a strength.

Humility

Growing in grace

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With a thick blanket of snow still on the ground, it’s hard to believe that it’s the middle of March already. We’re two and a half months into a new year and an incident this week reminded me of my One Word for 2018.

Grace.

How am I doing? My initial response indicated to me that I still have some growing to do in order to become the woman of grace that I would like to be.  It also prompted me to think about what that woman would look like. How would she respond in challenging situations where it’s sometimes difficult to show grace?

Almost three years ago, Christian author, speaker, and Bible teacher, Kathy Howard, penned this list of 15 characteristics of grace (compiled from passages in Ephesians and 1 Corinthians) on her blog.

A person of grace…

  1. Doesn’t insist on being right, but seeks to make things right
  2. Is willing to be inconvenienced
  3. Seeks the welfare of the other person
  4. Speaks words that build up, not tear down
  5. Doesn’t demand to be heard, but strives to listen
  6. Focuses on others needs instead of their own
  7. Acts with humility, not pride
  8. Doesn’t keep score
  9. Looks for ways to help and encourage others
  10. Freely forgives
  11. Seeks to understand
  12. Doesn’t expect a return
  13. Focuses on the important over the urgent
  14. Doesn’t pick and choose whom to show grace
  15. Doesn’t overlook sin, but encourages holiness

I would also add…

16. Doesn’t always have to have the last word

After this week’s incident, I think perhaps I need to focus on #4. I consider myself quite gifted with words, but it’s a gift that can be used positively or negatively. I can speak life or condemnation. It’s pretty easy for me to write a scathing response to something that irritates or upsets me, but as a person of grace I would choose to use gentler words.

Does this mean that a gracious person is wishy-washy? Absolutely not! It’s entirely possible to be strong, even assertive, and yet still be gracious. Jesus was a perfect example.

That thought brings me to #7, another area for self-examination. Humility. But that will be the topic of another post.

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One word for 2018

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A year ago, as part of a ministry that I was involved in, I was asked to choose one word to inspire or guide me in the coming year and to choose a scripture verse to go along with it. As a lover of words, this was a perfect assignment for me! I have since learned that there’s a whole #OneWord365 movement on the internet urging members to choose just one word to focus on every day, all year long; a word that sums up who they want to be or how they want to live.

Last year, my one word was still and the Bible verse I chose to accompany it was Psalm 46:10. “Be still and know that I am God.”

This year, I decided to repeat the exercise with a new word for 2018. After much consideration, I chose the word grace. I would like to be known and remembered as a woman of grace. The scripture passage that has become my life guide in recent times is Colossians 3:12. Though it doesn’t actually use the word, I think it epitomizes grace. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

There are, of course, many Bible verses that do include the word grace. One that comes quickly to mind, especially so close on the heels of the Christmas season, is John 1:14. “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” Christ was full of grace! I want this to be a year when I become a little more like Him; a little more compassionate, kind, humble, gentle and patient. This year, I want to be intentional (that’s another word I considered as my one word for 2018) about offering grace to other people in practical ways.

In order to do that, I also need to look at what grace is not. Grace is not simply being nice. It’s not a peace at all costs, everything’s okay, and who am I to judge mentality. Sometimes grace includes confronting difficult issues and not shying away from controversial subjects. Sometimes it means talking honestly about the ugly, painful, and sordid struggles in our lives. It is honouring the dignity of others even when I don’t agree with them or their choices. Thankfully, offering this kind of grace is not something that I have to figure out how to do on my own.

When C.S. Lewis was asked to identify the one thing about Christianity that sets it apart from all other religions, he responded, ″Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.″ Biblical grace is the unmerited favour of God bestowed freely on all who choose to access it by accepting Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour. This year and every year, I can rest in God’s gentle, extravagant, audacious grace, knowing that He is God Almighty and I am His beloved daughter. It is He who enables me to offer grace to others.

“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”  Hebrews 4:16

One Word 2018

What about you? Can you think of one word to inspire or guide you in this new year?

Ten years of blogging!

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Ten years ago today I published my very first blog post! It was also the shortest post I’ve ever written and the message was very simple:

Richard and I have just accepted positions teaching conversational English in Japan. This is a one year commitment and we’ll be leaving in mid March. The main purpose of this blog is to share our adventure with friends, family and anyone else who’s interested.

Little did I expect to still be blogging ten years later! I anticipated that Following Augustine would only exist for the year that we would be in Asia. In fact, that’s why I chose the title. Augustine BeArce, a Romany Gypsy, was the first of my ancestors to cross the Atlantic Ocean from Europe and make his home in North America. 370 years later when I crossed the Pacific Ocean and settled for a time on the far side of the sea, it only seemed right to give credit to Augustine and the Gypsy blood that I inherited from him!

I’ve always been passionate about writing though and by the time our year in Japan came to an end, I knew that blogging was something I would continue to do indefinitely. What I didn’t know was what it would look like once I was no longer living in a foreign land. For lack of a better definition, I now refer to Following Augustine as a lifestyle, travel, and fashion blog, but one of my readers once called it a great advertisement for retirement!

Over the past decade, life has taken many unusual turns, some delightful and others deeply distressing. Following Augustine has been there through all the ups and downs.

We love to travel and the blog has recorded trips across Canada, into the United States, and to numerous other countries. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever expect to live in the People’s Republic of China though, but our five months there gave me plenty to write about. China’s internet censorship made it a bit more challenging to post from there, but thankfully, with the help of WordPress, I discovered a way to successfully break through or over the “Great Firewall” and continue blogging.

Cancer was never part of my plan either, but when it struck, the blog became a good way to process what was happening and to share it with friends and family. I’ve also used it as a way to raise awareness of NETS (neuroendocrine tumours), the little-known and often misdiagnosed cancer that I continue to deal with. My life is not all about my health, however, so neither is the blog. It’s about living life to the fullest in spite of all its challenges.

A couple of years ago, I became interested in fashion blogging and so the weekly Fashion Friday feature was born, not as a “look what I’m wearing today” narcissistic sort of thing, but as a way to connect with other women and to explore how the ways in which we present ourselves affect our lives. It has had the added benefit of ensuring that I write something at least once a week.

I am a Christ follower and I have fairly strong and not always popular or politically correct opinions on certain issues. I haven’t shied away from sharing those on the blog, but I’m committed to doing so with as much wisdom as God allows me, with integrity and with respect for those whose opinions differ from mine.

When I published that first post ten years ago, our daughter was expecting our first grandchild, so over the years five little people have appeared on the blog from time to time. I’m off to visit three of them this weekend and the other two for Christmas, so it’s possible that they might show up again soon!

What does the future hold for Following Augustine? I have no idea, but I’ve now written 882 posts and I don’t see them coming to an end anytime soon!

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