We don’t have internet access at my parents’ home in Vancouver but I’m writing anyway and will post whenever I’m able.  The following was written on Saturday, October 10.

I’ve been afraid of heights for as long as I can remember but today I challenged that fear and won! Overcoming this phobia has actually been a long and gradual process. When my children were young I was determined not to pass my fear on to them so I forced myself to do things and go places that I might otherwise have avoided. I remember riding the glass elevator up the outside of the CN Tower in Toronto with them in 1991. I stood as far back as I could and still, by the time we reached the top, the brochure that I was carrying literally bore the imprint of my white knuckled fingers, I was clutching it so tightly.

I’ve also been determined to live life to the fullest and not to allow fear to keep me from seeing and experiencing all that it has to offer. Consequently, over time the fear has gradually diminished. Climbing Mount Fuji last year was a definite turning point. Since we climbed at night and couldn’t see beyond the area that was illuminated by our flashlights, my fear didn’t really kick in until after sunrise the following morning when we began our descent. At first, I was almost paralysed but once you’ve reached a mountaintop, staying there isn’t an option! I had no choice but to force myself to begin the downward climb. The trail was wide and, in my head, I knew that it was perfectly safe but that didn’t make it any easier. As I forced myself to continue putting one foot in front of the other, however, I gradually relaxed and began to enjoy the views laid out below us. By the time we reached the bottom, I knew that I had conquered a giant.

This fall, on a particularly windy day during harvest, it was necessary for either Louis or I to climb to the top of one granary to check whether or not it was full and then another to open the hatch. The only ladder that we had at our disposal was quite flimsy and in the wind, we didn’t consider it safe enough so he lifted me to the top of the granaries in the bucket of his front end loader!  To reach the hatch on the second one, I had to climb out of the bucket onto the top of the granary. There was a time when I couldn’t have forced myself to do that but it was actually fun. That’s when I knew it was time to challenge my long held fear of suspension bridges!

For several years, while growing up, I lived within walking distance of Lynn Valley Canyon in North Vancouver. As a terrified teen, I crossed the suspension bridge that dangles some 50 metres above the canyon a few times but I always had nightmares afterward. Returning as a adult some years later, I was unable to step foot on it. Even though the children were with us, I simply couldn’t force myself. They crossed with their father and grandfather while I stood by and watched.

Before we came to Vancouver this time, feeling confident that my fear was finally under control, I determined that we would visit the park again and that I would cross that bridge. I thought to go one day next week when the park wouldn’t likely be crowded and I might even be able to cross alone without the vibration caused by many people crossing at once. This morning, however, we woke to beautiful sunshine and even though it’s a long weekend and I knew that the park would be busy, I decided that today was the day.

We went directly to the bridge and I crossed, not once, not twice, but five times! The first time, I stepped out confidently but crossed with some hesitation and didn’t look down. The second time, I stopped midway and enjoyed the view and by the fifth time, I crossed without even touching the handrails! What a victory!

Will fear of heights ever threaten me again? I don’t know, but if it does I know that I will remember that I’ve crossed the bridge and hopefully that will give me the courage to step out in confidence.

Last Friday was our 33rd wedding anniversary. We drove to Calgary that day and spent the weekend with our daughter, son-in-law and 17 month old grandson, Andrew. While we were there, the first snow of the season fell. In my opinion, it came much too early!

Monday was my birthday. We left Calgary that morning and drove to Cranbrook, BC via Banff and Radium. The drive through the mountains was spectacular with fresh snow and sunshine on the peaks and fall colours all around us. What a gift!

After spending the night with friends, we continued our journey to Vancouver the following day to meet our newest grandson, Sam. What an exciting moment that was! Because we were living in Japan when Andrew was born, we didn’t meet him until he was over 10 months old. Needless to say, we’re cherishing the opportunity see and hold newborn Sam who is sound asleep in his bassinet behind me. I can hear his tiny breaths and little grunts as I write.

In addition to enjoying our time with the grandchildren, it’s been a pleasure to watch our children become parents. Melaina has proven herself to be a wonderful mom and to see Matt, a competent world traveler and soon to be full fledged lawyer, tenderly holding his wee son in his big hands and to hear him extolling the virtues of a new baby stroller or comparing diaper brands is truly delightful! As grandparents, we couldn’t be prouder.

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that my retirement years would include seasonal farm labour but it’s harvest time again and I’ve spent many hours on a combine this week! Though harvest is late this year, we’re enjoying an unusually warm and dry September allowing us put in long productive days. As I cross the golden wheat fields, I’m surrounded by the beauty of the season and can almost see the leaves turning brilliant shades of yellow and orange around me.

Fall holds another delight for us this year.  Our second grandchild is due just two weeks from today! Since he’ll be putting in his appearance in Vancouver, we’ll be on the road again when harvest is over.

Fall is also drama season. Five performances of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol are scheduled for the last two weekends of November. Auditions have taken place, the cast list has been posted and the first rehearsal took place this week. Since we can’t commit to a heavy rehearsal schedule this year, Richard and I have both taken very minor roles this time. Fortunately, our director understands the importance of both harvest and meeting new grandchildren!

I’ve played a lot of golf over the past week. It started last Sunday with the Club Championship, our annual members only tournament. Eighteen holes of competitive play determined the men’s, women’s, junior’s and senior’s champions for the year. I wasn’t particularly happy with my play during the competition but the day ended on a great note. After a delicious steak supper, those who chose to do so participated in a “horse race”. Based on the day’s performance, high scorers are partnered with low scorers and the game is played with partners hitting alternate balls. At the end of each hole, the teams with the highest scores are eliminated until only the top two or three teams remain by the ninth hole. In this case, we started with 14 teams all hitting off the first tee. Unlike a serious golf game where it’s very poor etiquette to make noise of any kind when another player is hitting, a horse race involves lots of heckling and good natured teasing. Because I hadn’t golfed particularly well during the day, I had the good fortune to be partnered with the men’s champion and we came in second, winning a percentage of the $5 per person entry fee. It wasn’t a large amount of money but it was the fun of participating and winning that counted.

On Wednesday mornings, we enjoy playing senior’s golf which is open to everyone aged 50 and over. This week was our annual wind-up. We played nine holes in the morning with cash prizes going to the top three male and female golfers in both gross score and net score categories. Net scores are calculated using handicaps which are based on scores from throughout the season. Richard played well and won third prize in the men’s net score category. Again, I didn’t play particularly well. During the afternoon, we played nine holes of fun golf that involved a number of silly games and lots of laughter.

Thursday evening is ladies night but, because I had a drama meeting that evening, I decided to go out for nine holes in the afternoon and ended up scoring a personal best of 42! What amazed me most was how easy it seemed. I really can’t figure out why I can’t golf that way all the time! It’s the good hits and the good games that keep us going back to this crazy sport so, of course, I had to go out again yesterday to see if I could do it again! I couldn’t but I did play pretty well so when some friends called to see if I wanted to go for another round in the evening, I did. I matched my afternoon score and was feeling pretty pleased with myself and fired up for today, the annual ladies tournament.

Maybe it’s competition that causes my game to go downhill. After playing so well the past couple of days, I couldn’t do it today! I had some good holes and some bad ones, some lucky breaks and some not so lucky. In the end, my score was a little higher than average. Like many tournaments, this one is flighted or grouped in such a way that golfers of all levels have a chance to win something. Though I wasn’t entirely happy with my score, it was good enough to win fourth place in the second flight and I came home with a lovely sweater. It isn’t the prize that made the day a great one, however. I golfed with two ladies from our club and a guest from another town who were all fun to be with. Our ladies tournament is also a fundraiser for the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation. As this dreadful disease claimed the life of a very dear friend three years ago, this makes it very meaningful to me. In addition, we had fantastic weather today which is almost unheard of for this particular tournament. I remember years when ladies rode their golf carts wrapped in quilts because it was so cold out and once, we played the entire day in our rain suits because it was so wet! What a delight it was to play in beautiful sunshine! As the day progressed, the wind got stronger and at times, it played havoc with our balls but it did keep away the mosquitoes which have been terrible lately.

The various competitions of the past week spell the beginning of the end. The golf year is winding down. The course will be open for another month until just after Thanksgiving but I don’t expect to play much more now that harvest has begun. Richard has been swathing grain almost every day this week and beginning Monday, I expect to be combining. As much as I enjoy golf, I also love my time on the combine so that’s just fine with me!

Our new passports arrived in the mail today; 24 pristine pages waiting to be stamped and stapled! I wonder how many interesting places they will take us?

Fortunately, we were allowed to keep the old passports as souvenirs, reminders of times spent in fascinating and exotic places. Over the past five years, they took us to Japan twice (the second time for a whole year), South Korea, Vietnam, Cambodia, Hong Kong, Macau and, of course, back and forth across the American border several times. Their pages contain some very interesting documents such as our visas from the Kingdom of Cambodia and the Socialist Republic of Viet Nam. Perhaps the most interesting and memorable, however, are our Japan work visas which list us as Specialists in Humanities / International Service, a very fancy way of saying English Teacher!

Where might the new passports take us? I’m already planning a trip across the United States and into Atlantic Canada either next summer or the summer after. A return trip to Japan is an absolute must as we now have so many friends to visit there. In fact, if money was no object, we’d visit Japan regularly. There’s a very big world out there waiting for us though and so many places we haven’t been yet.

While we enjoy being tourists, we much prefer the idea of immersing ourselves in a culture and getting to know its people the way we did during our year in Japan. We also enjoy being retired, however, and have a growing family of grandchildren here in Canada so we aren’t likely to spend a whole year abroad again. Instead, we’re looking for short term opportunities of two or three months. We’re willing to go almost anywhere and do anything we’re capable of so who knows where that might lead us? The world is full of possibilities and the passports are ready to go!

When we returned to Canada early this year, we decided that it would be a good idea to take advantage of the ecoENERGY Retrofit Homes grants that have been made available by the Canadian and Alberta governments in an attempt to encourage homeowners to reduce the amount of energy used in their houses and thus reduce the production of greenhouse gases.

In order to qualify for the rebates, the first step is to have an energy audit done by a certified energy advisor. When that was done, we were happy to learn that our house already exceeded the average energy efficiency rating for a house of its age in Alberta. In fact, the advisor told us that it was as airtight as a new construction. He did, however, make several recommendations to help improve its energy efficiency.

The biggest potential for energy savings and, therefore, the biggest rebate available, involves replacing an old gas furnace with a newer high efficiency one.  Our house is 29 years old and until a couple of weeks ago, it still had the original furnace. It was working fine but we knew that, at it’s age, something could go wrong at any time and it only made sense to replace it this year while the ecoENERGY program is in effect and the rebate available. We had a furnace with a 92% annual fuel utilization efficiency installed by a local heating and plumbing company.

Though we’ve had most of the windows on the main floor replaced in recent years, when the audit was done we discovered that a great deal of heat was being lost around the windows. Richard removed the trim from around all of them, insulated the cracks and sealed them with caulking. Though we expected the energy advisor to recommend that we replace the basement windows, he didn’t.  The rebates available for replacing windows are small and he didn’t feel that replacing the them would be wise financially. He did, however, suggest that we seal the two that are not needed for ventilation or as possible emergency exits closed. Richard has done that as well as replacing the weatherstripping around both outside doors and installing foam pads behind all the electrical outlets on the outer walls to reduce leakage there.

We completed our energy upgrades today by blowing an additional layer of cellulose insulation, made from 100% recycled paper, into the attic. Though Richard thought it might take all day, with the help of a friend, we finished the job in four hours including time for a coffee break! Once we figured out a routine that worked well, the job went very smoothly. The insulation comes in tightly compacted bales of approximately 25 pounds each. Louis & I worked out in the front yard tearing the bales apart and filling the machine which was on loan from the Home Hardware where we purchased the insulation. Up in the attic, Richard spread it around and ensured that an even depth was maintained.

The final step will be having a follow-up evaluation done. At that point, the energy management company that does the audits will file the necessary paperwork and eventually we’ll receive the rebates.  I say eventually because we understand that we might have to wait quite awhile. Apparently, the ecoENERGY program has been so popular that both the energy management companies and the governments have been having trouble keeping up with the demand.

I’m not at all fond of winter and I hope that it doesn’t arrive for quite some time but when it does, I’m happy to know that we’ll be snug and warm in our energy upgraded home. I’m also hopeful that the gas bills, which were already lower than many people pay, will be even lower.

The phone rang one morning a little over a week ago. It was Richard’s brother, Fred, wondering if we had time to spend a few days helping put up silage. This was a phone call that would never have come a few years ago but since I started helping out on our friend, Louis’, farm during seeding and harvest, Richard’s brothers no longer see me as a city girl or a school teacher.  Now, I’m a potential worker! We made the four hour trip to the family farm near Barrhead after church last Sunday and started work on Monday.

Silage is a combination of grasses, in this case oats and barley, that are cut and preserved as feed for cattle or other livestock. The grasses are swathed, or cut, just before they are fully mature when their nutrient levels are highest. The cut grass is then chopped into fine pieces and compacted in a large pit where it is allowed to ferment. Once the pit is full, it is covered with heavy plastic sheeting which is weighted down with old tires. The process requires at least four workers; one on the swather, one on the cutter, one hauling truckloads of cut grass from the field to the pit and finally, one in the pit on a tractor spreading the grass and driving back and forth over it until the pile is firm.

Richard and Fred took turns operating the swather and driving truck while our nephew, Shane, drove the cutter. Packing the pit was my job and not one I particularly enjoyed! It was more difficult than I thought it would be, mainly because the gears on the old Versatile 875 tractor were very hard to shift. Because I spent all day going back & forth, back & forth, I had to change gears constantly. It felt like I was tearing my right arm and shoulder apart! In addition, I had to learn how to use a blade to push the silage around & smooth it out. That was frustrating at times but by the time we finished, I was getting the hang of it! It also didn’t help that, for the first two days, I was battling nausea much of the time. I never did figure out whether that was caused by the stress of trying to do a difficult task well, the back and forth motion of the tractor or a stomach bug of some sort. Fortunately, it settled down by the third day. I also quickly realized that one of the things I’ve loved most about farming is being out in the open fields under the big Alberta sky. I missed that this time. My favourite part of each day was supper time when my sister-in-law, Ronali, picked me up at the pit and we drove out into the field to join the guys and eat together.

the silage pit, almost full

We were slowed down a couple of times by minor breakdowns and trips to town for parts but the job was done by supper time on Friday and we covered the pit as the sun went down. In spite of the fact that I was never really sure if I was doing the job well enough, Fred was very happy to have the help and I must have done alright as he’s already talking about us coming back next year! I’m not so sure, but we’ll see. In the meantime, we’re back at home and as soon as the crops are ripe enough, I’ll be out on Louis’ combine helping with harvest again. I can hardly wait!

It looks like the gypsy blood has been passed on to yet another generation. My 19 year old niece, Emily, left today on what might very well become the adventure of a lifetime. She plans to spend the next two years serving on the missionary ship, MV Doulos. Following a ten day conference in the Netherlands, she’ll join the ship at Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia. We’re not certain where the next two years will take her but the ship is scheduled to spend the remainder of this year visiting Malaysia, Singapore and Thailand.

Emily isn’t the first of her family to set foot on the Doulos.  Before she or any of her five siblings were born, her parents, my sister, Linda, and her husband, Jeff, spent time serving on both Doulos and her sister ship, Logos.

Originally launched in August 1914, the Doulos is recognized by the Guinness Book of Records as the world’s oldest active ocean-going passenger ship. Originally a freighter, she was converted into a passenger ship in 1948 and in 1952, further remodeling transformed her into a first class luxury liner. In 1977, she was sold and altered once again. Renovations included the removal of the swimming pool to make room for a covered book exhibit.

The name, Doulos, is Greek and means bond servant or slave. Volunteers on board seek to serve God and the nations they visit. We aren’t sure yet what Emily’s role will be but, according to the ship’s mission statement or purpose, “Doulos visits port cities throughout the world, supplying vital literature resources, encouraging inter-cultural understanding, training young people for more effective life and service, promoting greater global awareness, providing practical aid and sharing a message of hope in God wherever there is opportunity.”

Known for her floating book fairs, she also carries donated books to schools, libraries, colleges, churches and universities in developing countries. Conferences and workshops are held on board and Doulos volunteers engage in a wide variety of relief projects on land including constructing orphanages, building shelters for the victims of natural disasters and distributing medical aid, food and supplies where needed.

Over the years, Doulos has visited over 100 countries and more than 20 million visitors have been welcomed on board. Over the next two years, not only will Emily learn to live in very close quarters with an international family of volunteers, she will also see many new and exciting places and rub shoulders with people of many different cultures. I have no doubt that it will be a time of great personal and spiritual growth. What an exciting opportunity!

We woke up to a steady rain yesterday morning. Thirty-six hours later, it’s still raining! I don’t remember the last time I saw a rain like this one here. We were supposed to golf in a charity tournament yesterday afternoon; a fundraiser for two local hospitals. It had to be postponed until next week but nobody’s complaining!

We could have used this rain back in early June. Instead, severe drought conditions have left the area with the worst crops since the 1930s. This rain’s not too late to be of some good, however. It should help the grain that’s there fill out, especially if it’s followed by more heat.

Canada switched to the metric system almost 40 years ago but in the farming community rain is still measured in tenths of inches. Every farm has a rain gauge and comments like “we got seven tenths” are understood by all. Though we weren’t involved in farming until recently, we’ve had several rain gauges over the years but they always seem to get broken. The last one disappeared during our year away. I bought a new one today, however, and it’s now attached to a fence post and collecting rain. It’s too late to measure how much has already fallen but I’ve heard reports of approximately two inches and it isn’t showing any signs of stopping yet! Hooray!