Writing

Why I write about fashion

/ edebock / 7 Comments

logo-by-samLately, especially on weeks like this one when writer’s block seems to have set in and I have a hard time thinking of a topic for Friday’s post, I’ve been pondering why it is that I choose to write about fashion. After all, I was the awkward teen with zero fashion sense who, even when I stretched my babysitting and allowance dollars to buy what the “in” girls were wearing, felt self-consciously out of place and wanted to fade into the background. Fashion just wasn’t my thing and I certainly had no idea back then that there was such a thing as personal style or style adjectives. 

It wasn’t until about 15 years ago when fashion blogging became popular, that I began to take an interest in the topic. In those days, it was mainly seen as a hobby, a way for fashion enthusiasts to share their thoughts and ideas with the world. Eventually, after following several of these blogs for awhile, I found myself looking for a topic that would keep my blog active when I didn’t have anything more exciting (aka travel) to write about. Why not try my hand at fashion, I thought, and Fashion Friday was born!

With the passage of time, fashion blogging has changed. Some of the blogs that I originally followed eventually disappeared, but as others became more visible and gained a greater following, opportunities to monetize arose. Advertisers and brands began to recognize the value of these voices and reached out to engage with them. At first, popular bloggers were offered free merchandise in exchange for positive reviews, but as time went by they started to earn commission on items that were purchased through links on their blogs. Some even saw this as an opportunity to make fashion blogging a full-time career.  

I’ve never had any desire to move in that direction. I’m still very firmly in the blogging as a hobby camp and the more I see, the happier I am to stay there. One of the bloggers that I’ve been following for many years recently wrote about the fact that she never buys any clothing for herself that she can’t link to on her blog. As a result, her personal style has taken a hit and where she once found joy in fashion, she no longer does. On a recent trip, she visited several local boutiques and had the opportunity to buy some unique pieces, but didn’t because she couldn’t earn income from them. How sad! Others lament the fact that they no longer feel free to be their authentic selves. Instead they’ve created an image that they need to keep up and, in some cases, it’s taking a toll on their mental and emotional health. 

So why do I continue to write about fashion? I sometimes wonder if it isn’t a bit narcissistic, but I try to avoid too many “look at me” posts by also delving into a variety of fashion related topics like sustainability and shopping ethically. I’ve learned a lot about the fashion industry, but also about myself. I’ve figured out what my personal style is. I know what I want my clothing to say about me and I’ve chosen the appropriate adjectives to help me build the right wardrobe. These are the kinds of things that I want to share with you, my readers. After all, connecting with other women with a common interest and being part of this community has been the best part of writing about fashion! That’s really what keeps me doing this. 

Throughout the summer, however, I will be indulging some of my other passions… camping, hiking, kayaking, and visiting with family. I have no more medical appointments until the middle of August and I intend to take full advantage of that! For significant periods of time, I will be without internet access. I’ll blog when and where I’m able, but it will be sporadic and there will be some weeks when Fashion Friday doesn’t appear. Don’t go away though. It will be back!   

 

Sixteen years of blogging!

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I published my very first blog post sixteen years ago today! It was also the shortest post I’ve ever written; a brief message announcing that hubby and I had just accepted positions teaching conversational English in Japan. The blog was meant to share that year-long adventure with friends, family and anyone else who might be interested. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that it would still be alive and well sixteen years later!

The title, Following Augustine, no longer fits the blog as well as it did in those early days, but since it’s what I’ve been known as in the blogosphere for more than a decade and a half, I hesitate to consider changing it. You can read about why I originally chose the title here.

Though I probably already had neuroendocrine cancer (NETS) when the blog was born, I didn’t know about it until several years later. When I finally received a correct diagnosis, blogging became a helpful way to process what was happening and to share the journey with friends and family. I also use the blog to raise awareness of NETS. I’m sure that this will continue to happen as I’ve recently become a member of a newly formed Advocacy Advisory Board that will report to the board of directors of the Canadian Neuroendocrine Tumour Society (CNETS).

When I started the blog, writing about fashion was the farthest thing from my mind. Several years ago, however, I starting following several fashion blogs and began to develop a greater interest in the topic. It was then that I decided to add the weekly Fashion Friday feature. At times, I find it a challenge to come up with a new fashion related topic every week, but it’s been a great way to connect with other women and to ensure that I post something at least once a week. Fashion Friday has a fairly small, but loyal following of interested readers, so I as long as I can continue to think of engaging content, I plan to keep the feature going.

As an avid reader, it was my passion for books that prompted me to add the latest feature to the blog, a monthly book review that first appeared at the beginning of February this year.

I refer to Following Augustine as a lifestyle, travel, and fashion blog, but in recent years, there hasn’t been as much travel content as I would have liked. First, the pandemic and then a number of other health issues, both mine and hubby’s, have limited our ability to spend as much time away from home as we would like, but our brand new ten year passports arrived in yesterday’s mail and we hope to be able to put them to good use in the future. If that happens, the blog will once again chronicle our wanderings.

Following Augustine will probably continue to undergo changes from time to time, but at this point, I don’t see it coming to an end anytime soon. Over the past sixteen years, I’ve published over 1400 posts and I expect that I’ll continue adding to that number until I’m no longer able!

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Living my cancer life out loud

/ edebock / 6 Comments

This post was inspired by an interesting discussion that took place awhile ago on one of the online neuroendocrine cancer patient groups that I’m a member of. It started with a younger patient asking for advice about when to tell the person she was going on a first date with about her cancer. I was surprised to learn that most of the patients who responded to her question had told very few people outside their immediate families about their diagnosis. I’m quite the opposite. Though I’m naturally an introvert, I’ve been living my cancer journey out loud since the very first day I heard that fateful C word!

In the summer of 2013, when my doctor called and told me that I had cancer, I’m sure that I was in shock. One of the first things I did was sit down and make a list of who I needed to call and then I started. I called our pastor, several close friends, and of course, our family. Just three days later, I wrote the blog post that shared my diagnosis with the rest of the world. At that time, we didn’t even know what kind of cancer I had. I shared that news a couple of weeks later in this post.

Why? Why did I choose to share my diagnosis so openly?

Learning that you have cancer is overwhelming and I knew that this wasn’t something I could handle on my own. As a Christian, my first instinct was to call the people I knew would pray for me. Without realizing it, I was beginning to build an invaluable support system that would make the journey so much easier.

There were two reasons for sharing my diagnosis on the blog. Writing helps me process things and boy did I need to process! Since I’d already been blogging for several years, that seemed like the logical place to start writing about what I was going through. Secondly, posting updates on the blog was an easy way to communicate what was happening with our large extended family and with friends who are literally spread around the world. It meant that I didn’t have to repeat myself over and over again which would have been mentally and emotionally exhausting.

As time went by, however, sharing my journey openly and online also became a way to educate people about neuroendocrine cancer. Ten years ago, NETS was considered a rare cancer, but the number of people diagnosed with this type of tumour has been increasing over the years and it’s no longer fair to say that it’s rare. Sadly, however, it’s still not well-known, so education and advocacy are extremely important. Like any other cancer, early detection means more likelihood of successful treatment and long-term survival. Family doctors need to know that when a patient presents with symptoms such as abdominal pain, diarrhea, shortness of breath, wheezing, heart palpitations, high blood pressure, and/or flushing, neuroendocrine cancer is a possibility. Patients need to know that when their symptoms persist after a more common diagnosis is made, they need to persevere until they get a correct one. It could be NETS. Patients with neuroendocrine cancer, particularly the newly diagnosed, need to know that there is hope. More research is needed to find better treatments and ultimately a cure. Until these things happens, I’ll continue living my cancer life out loud!

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From self-conscious to self-confident

/ edebock / 2 Comments

Logo by SamHere I am more than half way through a Friday and I haven’t written a Fashion Friday post yet. To tell you the truth, I didn’t think there’d be one today. I usually try to write these posts earlier in the week and have them ready to publish on Friday morning, but this week was a hectic one. I was only home for two and a half days between pre Christmas visits with two of our offspring and their families. I didn’t have time to do any research or even a photo shoot.

The first piece of advice that is usually given to an aspiring writer is to write what you know. Thinking about that this morning, I asked myself why I write about fashion. I have no formal training or experience in the industry. It’s not even a topic that interested me until late in life. So, why fashion? Why these weekly posts? 

When I discovered that an item of clothing or an outfit can change how you feel about yourself, I went from self-conscious to self-confident and that’s something that I wanted to share with my readers. 

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If how we look on the outside makes us feel good on the inside, then it’s important to choose what we wear with intention. Think about what you’re wearing right now. How does it make you feel? Fashion is a form of expression and we all deserve to express ourselves in ways that make us feel confident and joyful. Since we’re all unique that will look different for each of us. For specifics on how to dress with confidence check this post from last month. 

With Christmas just around the corner and plans being made to spend the holiday with another branch of the family, time to write and to explore the topic of fashion might be limited, but I’ll do my best to keep up and to have something to share with you each week. For now, though, there’s a grandbaby to play with and a couple more coming home from school in just a little while. 

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Sometimes I just have to write

/ edebock / 6 Comments

Sometimes I just have to write. I don’t know why, but something in me tells me that I need to. My fingers hover over the keyboard wondering how to begin. Sometimes the words flow and other times, my mind is blank. What could I possibly have to say that anyone would want to read? At times like those, I usually resist the urge and try to find something else to do, but this time I decided to simply start. Where this is going, I really don’t know!

Although I love to lose myself in a good novel, I’m  not a writer of fiction. I never have been. I’ve tried dabbling in it once or twice, but it clearly wasn’t my forte. Neither am I a poet. No, though nonfiction seems somehow less exciting, it’s what I do.

Scripture tells us that we’re made in the image of a creative God. As such, I believe that we all have the innate ability to be creative. I create with words. What do you create with?

I have a friend who is an avid quilter. She creates works of art with fabric and many of her quilts bring comfort to people living with cancer. (see Victoria’s Quilts Canada or Victoria’s Quilts USA) Another friend is an artist in the kitchen creating culinary masterpieces and a cousin is a songwriter. My daughter knits and crochets everything from sweaters and slippers to teddy bears and stuffed animals. Some people are artists in the traditional sense creating drawings, paintings, or sculptures. Others design and build with wood. Still others create online games and programs.

Releasing creativity, whatever form it takes, can be therapeutic. It can help people resolve issues as well as develop and manage behaviours and feelings, reduce stress, and improve self-esteem and awareness. There are things that I can’t write about, or at least I can’t publish, because they would be hurtful to people that I care deeply about or because they’re not my stories to tell. Writing about my cancer, however, especially in the early days, helped me process and better accept and understand what was happening. Some cancer centres even offer art therapy classes to their patients.

We all have gifts and passions. I’m thankful that I found mine a long time ago. Even as a child, I enjoyed writing reports for school. As a university student, I much preferred essays to exams. By the time I graduated, I knew that even though teaching was my chosen profession, writing would also be part of my future. Of course, there was no internet back then. I did a bit of freelance writing, selling a few articles to small publications, but it was retirement and the advent of blogging that really opened the door to writing for sheer enjoyment. To date, I’ve published over 1300 posts. Together they’d equal the length of an average novel!

The only problem with not knowing where this post was going is not knowing how it should end, so I’ll simply finish with a couple of quotes from science fiction writer, Isaac Asimov.

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Taking time to recharge

/ edebock / 3 Comments

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I ran across this recently and it resonated with me as it describes what I’m planning to do over the next little while. I won’t disappear completely, but I won’t be spending as much time as usual on social media and I probably won’t be blogging very regularly. Over the next 6 to 8 weeks I’ll be spending lots of time camping, hiking, and paddling quiet waters; time away from my keyboard and often far from internet connection.

Writing is who I am. It’s what I do. To me, it’s almost as important as breathing, but spending time in nature is one of the ways that I recharge my batteries and perhaps in the silence I’ll find some new things to write about.

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Fashion humour

/ edebock / 4 Comments

LogoI’m quite surprised at how easy it’s been to keep Fashion Friday going for over five years without running out of new topics to write about, but lately the well of ideas seems to be running dry. I think it’s more than writer’s block though. I’m sure it’s partly due to the fact that I’m bored with the clothes in my closet and I’ve hardly bought any new ones in the past 14 months, but I think it also has a lot to do with the state of the world we’re living in. Writing about fashion seems pretty frivolous when you’re living in the province with the highest rate of active Covid cases in Canada and the United States and the situation is getting worse every day.

After wracking my brain for something meaningful to write about this week and coming up empty, I decided that maybe what we actually need is a bit of fashion humour to lighten the mood. We don’t have to look any further than the runway fashion shows where designers display their latest creations to find a few laughs and ask, “What were they thinking?”

Perhaps it would be best if designers didn’t let their creative juices flow when they’re hungry!

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I’ve always said that a mother should grow a new arm with each new child. Perhaps that’s what this designer had in mind, but that would be one big family!

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There’s a lot going on in this Easter bunny inspired outfit, but look at the sleeves. They’d be perfect for a mom whose arms are tired or perhaps for someone who’s broken both arms. The mask is also a nice touch during these pandemic days.

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Then, of course, there are the styles with no arms at all!

Cozy is nice, but this is a bit much, don’t you think?

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This one would certainly keep you warm on a cold winter day.

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Layering for warmth is a better idea, but it would appear that this designer didn’t quite grasp that concept.

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Some outfits are creepy…

and others are just too weird for words!

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A few the outfits shown above are clearly unisex, but today I also have two special designs for any men in the audience who like to show off their underwear!

Though I can’t actually imagine anyone wearing any of these creations except on the runway, I do have to admit that some of them are walking works of art. In some cases, very weird art, but art nevertheless. In my opinion, this one from China is both artistic and quite beautiful.

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Though I’m obvously struggling with it a bit at this point, I do want to keep Fashion Friday going, so if you have any suggestions for topics you’d like me to write about, I’d love to hear them! Please feel free to leave your ideas in the comment section.

A new job!

/ edebock / 4 Comments

My father, who died a year ago at almost 97 years old, always said of retirement that there is no end of things that you can do as long as you don’t need to be paid for them. I’m blessed to be able to follow in his footsteps. While we aren’t wealthy by any means, we are comfortable enough financially not to need to work. In the first few years of retirement, we did take paying jobs teaching English in Japan for a year and then China for several months. Since then, we’ve kept busy as volunteers in several capacities. In fact, at 68, I have just finished training for a brand new volunteer position that I’m very excited about!

I’ve often mentioned Kiva on the blog before. Kiva is a non-profit organization that allows a person to lend as little as $25 to a specific low-income entrepreneur in one of 77 countries around the world. When a loan is repaid, the money can be withdrawn or used to fund a new loan. Since making my first loan 11 years ago, I’ve been able to make 60 more by simply recycling the same money over and over again. When I learned that there was a need for volunteer editors, I realized that this might be an opportunity to put my skills into action and help in another way.

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An average of about 16,000 loan profiles are posted on the Kiva website every month. Each one needs to be carefully edited to ensure that it complies with Kiva policies, that the borrower’s privacy is maintained, that details are consistent, and that the language is understandable to lenders while retaining, as much as possible, the voice of the original text. Kiva relies on over 400 volunteers, each editing approximately 40 loan descriptions a month, to complete this enormous task. That’s my new job! I’ve joined Kiva’s Review and Translation Program as a volunteer editor! 

It was back in July of last year that I first expressed an interest in volunteering. My name was added to a wait list and I was told that I would hear from Kiva staff when they were ready to bring on new volunteer editors, probably much later in the year. In late November, I was asked to submit my resumé and complete an official application that included a brief loan review exercise. In early December, I was invited to take an editing test. Kiva works with a barebones staff and, like everyone else, they’ve been somewhat hindered by Covid slowdowns, so the wheels ground slowly, but at the beginning of February I was notified that my application was approved. At the beginning of March I started training and now I’m finally an active Kiva editor! I edited my first loan yesterday. The borrower was a farmer in Uganda who requested a loan to buy more cattle to fatten and resell.

Volunteer editors are split into teams each led by a volunteer team leader. I was assigned to a group called The Write Stuff which I find very fitting as writing has always been my passion! Kiva asks for a commitment of a minimum of 2 hours a week for at least 6 months, but I foresee being able to do this for a much longer period.

If you’re interested in making a loan, just click on the banner to the right.

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What’s your thing?

/ edebock / 4 Comments

Yesterday’s post included this quote from Donna McNutt, Instagram’s Cancer Fashionista, “It has now become my mission to tell others, find your thing, the thing that makes you whole, do not let cancer take it.” 

For me, that thing, apart from my faith, is writing. Fashion is fun. Travel is a passion. Reading, dancing, golfing, camping, hiking, kayaking, keeping fit, and participating in community theatre are all things I enjoy doing, but writing is the one thing I have to do. Long before cancer, writing was who I am.  

I first knew this in Mr. Geary’s grade 12 English class. I knew it in university when I loved the hours and hours spent researching and writing papers. I knew it when, as a young stay-at-home mom, I put my babies down for their afternoon naps, pulled out my typewriter, and worked on a correspondence course on non-fiction technique offered by the Alberta Culture Film and Literary Arts division. I knew it when, as a member of the now defunct Flagstaff Writers organization (Alberta, not Arizona), I had occasional pieces published in our column in the local weekly paper. I knew it when I sold a few articles to larger publications and savoured the feeling of a cheque in my hands. 

When my children were a bit older and I returned to teaching school, I discovered that there simply weren’t enough hours in the day for writing. Thankfully, for that period of time, passing on my love of reading and writing to my students fulfilled the same passion in me. As soon as I retired, however, the need to write was back. I’d always assumed that I would return to freelance writing, but then came blogging. As many of you know, I started Following Augustine to share our year of teaching English in Japan with friends and families at home. I had no idea then that it would still be going strong more than a decade later! 

Though receiving those cheques for published articles was nice, I discovered that I didn’t need to sell my writing to feel fulfilled by it. I just need to know that someone enjoys reading it. That’s one of the reasons that I haven’t attempted to monetize the blog. I prefer to maintain the freedom to write whatever I want without having to consider whether or not it’s consistent with the values of the brands that I’d be representing. For me, writing is not a job, it’s simply who I am.  

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Now, back to Donna’s wise advice, “find your thing, the thing that makes you whole, do not let cancer take it.” How has writing been part of my cancer journey? Has it helped me cope? There’s no question that cancer added another dimension to the blog. Within three days of hearing that I had cancer in August 2013, I’d published my first post about it and I’ve lived my cancer journey out loud on Following Augustine ever since. There are several reasons for that. First of all, since the blog was already well established and read by many of my close family and friends, it was an easy way to keep them informed about what was happening without having to repeat myself over and over again. Second, because writing is who I am, it helps me process the things that are happening in my life. That’s incredibly important when you’re dealing with something as complex and confusing as cancer and its treatment. And third, I’ve tried to use the blog to raise awareness of neuroendocrine cancer (NETs) which, while no longer rare, is still relatively unknown. Cancer is not who I am, but writing is!  

And now it’s your turn. What is that one thing that makes you whole; the one thing that you have to do? Have you found it yet? Please let us know in the comment section. 

The power of the written word

/ edebock / 8 Comments

The Bible has a lot to say about how we ought to use our words. The book of Proverbs is full of wise sayings about the power of the tongue.

The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.  Proverbs 17:27-28
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.  Proverbs 12:18

feather-pen-vector-546939It was English novelist and playwright Edward Bulwer-Lytton who, in 1839, wrote “The pen is mightier than the sword.”

Today, when most of us are holed up at home waiting out the Covid-19 pandemic, the written word is being used more than ever. We FaceTime and we Zoom, but we also use written platforms like Facebook and Twitter to connect with one another.

For some of us, writing is our preferred method of communication. We find it easy, but others may struggle to express themselves clearly. Without the visual and auditory clues that go along with face-to-face communication, misunderstandings can happen very easily. We definitely need to cut one another a bit of slack.

For example, a friend recently responded to something that I said on Facebook with a comment that could easily have been taken in two completely different ways. I had no way of knowing whether it was written in jest or meant to be extremely hurtful. If we had been talking face-to-face, I would have been able to tell based on her body language, facial expression, volume, and/or tone of voice. To tell you the truth, I still don’t know what her actual intent was, but because I know her and I don’t think of her as a mean person, I gave her the benefit of the doubt and assumed that, even if it fell a bit flat, her response was meant to be funny. Had I concluded that she was being nasty and responded in kind, I could have easily destroyed a relationship!

I love a good online conversation where people can express their views, have them heard, and willingly listen to the views of others. Unfortunately, however, what could have been a meaningful dialogue often becomes nothing more than a battle of words. Why is that? What can we do to prevent hurt feelings and misunderstandings? I have a few suggestions. If you have others, please add them to the comment section below.

  1. If you disagree with something that someone else has written, don’t react immediately. Take time to think about it first. Is there any truth in what they’ve written? Did they actually mean what you thought they meant? If you’re not sure, ask for clarification instead of immediately going on the defensive.
  2. Avoid getting sucked into arguments. Sadly, some people are willing to go toe-to-toe online in ways they’d never dream of doing face-to-face.
  3. Understand that your sense of humour isn’t universal and that, without cues like facial expressions and tone of voice, what is intended to be funny might not come across that way.
  4. Don’t comment on someone’s spelling or grammar. Sometimes the English teacher in me wants to take a red pen to the screen, but this is just plain rude! It’s also a tactic that’s often used by commenters who simply want to belittle someone they disagree with.
  5. Edit your responses before you post them. (There’s that English teacher again!) Read over what you’ve written. Does it actually say what you want it to say? Is it clear or could it be open to more than one interpretation?
  6. Distinguish between fact and opinion. Just as we should all know the difference between a news article and an editorial, we need to be clear when we’re the writer. If you’re declaring something to be a fact, be prepared to back it up. If it’s opinion, say so and remember that everyone is entitled to have one even if it’s different from yours. What a boring world it would be if we all agreed on everything!
  7. Remember, posting online is the same as speaking in public. If you don’t want something to come back and bite you, don’t say it online!
  8. Don’t be that person who always has to have the last word.
  9. Don’t drink and tweet! If you’re impaired in any way, whether it be from lack of sleep, a fight with your partner, or one too many drinks, you run the risk of saying something that you’ll regret. Resist the urge and wait until you’re in a better frame of mind.