How should I wear it?

June 21, 2019June 21, 2019 / edebock / 9 Comments

I’ve written about some pretty serious stuff this week and I really appreciate the many supportive comments both here and on Facebook. Today, however, I’m looking forward to getting back to something more fun… Fashion Friday! In this post I want to share an item that I recently purchased at our local thrift store and solicit your advice on how you think I should wear it. I was hoping to shoot the photos outdoors, but it was pouring rain, so that didn’t happen.

Other than the $1.50 price tag, what else do I like about this shirt? Almost everything! The dark moss colour is one of my favourite neutrals and is also very popular this season. I love the length, the shirttail hem, and the three-quarter sleeves. The brushed cotton/polyester fabric with just a touch of spandex is comfortable and easy to care for. The epaulettes, the small chest pockets, and the split cuffs add a bit of interest.

IMG_9517 - Version 2

The shirt is also versatile. I can wear it with tons of things in my closet and use it as a topper or on it’s own. I love it over the Breton striped t-shirt shown above, but it would also work well over a plain white tee.

So, what’s not to like? It’s the 15 cm zipper to nowhere in the middle of the back that has me confused. Yup, that’s right. A two way zipper that doesn’t zip anything!

I’m trying to figure out whether to wear it zipped, partially zipped, or not zipped at all.

In these two photos, the zipper is fully closed.

With the zipper undone, it’s a more relaxed fit.

Now that you’ve seen the possibilities, it’s your turn. How do you suggest I wear it?

PS. The bracelet that you see on my right wrist is not a new accessory. It’s a plastic hospital band that I have to wear for the first week following a treatment to alert emergency workers to the fact that I’m highly radioactive. It provides them with phone numbers to call in order to access information about how to deal with me in an emergency situation. Thankfully, it’s never been needed!

Radioactive again

November 29, 2018November 29, 2018 / edebock / 9 Comments

10991307_10153055708750915_6654881605691342497_n I had my 11th PRRT treatment on Monday and once again I’m too radioactive to be in close contact with other people. For a week following each treatment I spend most of my time at home. I sleep in the guest room, have my own bathroom, and stay at least a few feet away from Richard at all times.

There’s nothing funny about cancer and high doses of radiation, but sometimes you just have to laugh. I pose a particularly high risk to pregnant women and children, but since there’s no chance of running into any of them at our weekly senior’s bowling league, I played yesterday but sat apart from the rest of the bowlers. There were some who knew exactly why, but others who were curious. One jovial fellow, noticing that I was sitting alone, commented, “I see you’re sitting back there with all your friends!” I hope he didn’t feel bad when he found out why I was keeping my distance. I thought his comment was funny! Then there are invariably questions about whether or not I glow in the dark! (I don’t) One friend laughed and said I must be a night light! I told him that that must be the reason that I’m not allowed to sleep with Richard! The glow would keep him awake.

In all seriousness though, I have scans the morning after each treatment to determine whether or not there has been any change to my tumours. In the past, I’ve been able to sit down with a doctor immediately afterward to discuss the results, but this time was different. Dr Sandy McEwan, head of the clinical trial that I’ve been part of since 2014 and the driving force behind bringing state of the art NET cancer treatment to Edmonton, has left the program. While I’m sad for myself and the rest of his patients, I’m happy for him that he has been able to relocate to Toronto where he will be closer to family. I knew a couple of years ago when he proudly told me that he’d become a grandpa that that day might come! His departure means that there isn’t time for the remaining doctor to meet with every patient both before their treatment and after their scans. That meant that this time I came home not knowing what they showed. While I was still able to laugh yesterday, the question was there in the back of my mind. Was this the time that the news would be bad?

Thankfully, I wasn’t kept wondering very long. I chatted with one of the program nurses this morning and once again I heard that word that I’ve come to love; stable! There has been no change! Praise the Lord!

On being radioactive

November 19, 2017 / edebock / 8 Comments

10991307_10153055708750915_6654881605691342497_n Though we often laugh and joke about it, there’s nothing fun about being radioactive two weeks out of every year. I don’t glow in the dark and I don’t have any special powers. I simply feel tired and have to limit the time I spend in close contact with other people. It’s not that bad really, but when I sit alone and watch Sunday morning’s sermon online and when my husband is out at a social event while I’m at home alone, it’s easy to start feeling a bit sorry for myself.

People often compliment me on my positive attitude and I think they’re right that it has a lot to do with how well my cancer battle is going, but there are moments when it’s hard to remain positive, when I’m tempted to invite myself to a private pity party.

For those who are new to my blog, I have neuroendocrine tumours (NETS), a little-known cancer that is often quite advanced at diagnosis due to the fact that its most common symptoms are very similar to more common ailments such as Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Crohn’s disease, lactose intolerance, asthma, and even menopause. Though it’s incurable, it is slow-growing and often treatable. I have the good fortune to live 2.5 hours by car from a state of the art treatment centre, one of the very few in North America that offer the latest and best treatment available for this type of cancer.

At this point, I am treated with radioisotope therapy once every six months. This involves an overnight stay at the cancer clinic followed by a week of semi-isolation at home. During that week I have to have my own bedroom and my own bathroom and I have to limit my contact with other people because I’m highly radioactive. I pose an especially high risk to pregnant women and children under the age of 12.

I had my most recent treatment on Wednesday. Scans the following morning showed that my condition continues to be stable. My cancer has not grown or spread. That’s exceptionally good news and when I start to feel sorry for myself, I have to remind myself of that!

The first couple of days of radioactivity aren’t bad. I spend a lot of time in the armchair in the corner of our guest room (which becomes my room for the week) or curled up on the love seat in my den. I’ve read almost two books in the past few days and drank copious cups of tea. By today, however, I’m beginning to miss human contact and I’m itching to be set free!

I did go for a short walk this afternoon. It’s a gloomy, grey Sunday afternoon in our very small town and the temperature is -5ºC (23ºF). Two vehicles went by, one at a distance and the other close enough for the driver to wave. Other than that, I didn’t see a single soul. Definitely no danger of radiating anyone! I could hear traffic out on the highway, my own feet crunching on the snow, and the occasional winter bird in the trees. It didn’t do a great deal to lift my spirits, but I’m sure the fresh air and exercise were good for me.

When I start feeling a little mopey, perhaps it’s a good idea to once again remind myself of the things that cancer cannot do.

What Cancer Cannot Do

Cancer is so limited…

It cannot cripple LOVE

It cannot shatter HOPE

It cannot corrode FAITH

It cannot destroy PEACE

It cannot kill FRIENDSHIP

It cannot suppress MEMORIES

It cannot silence COURAGE

It cannot invade the SOUL

It cannot steal ETERNAL LIFE

It cannot conquer THE SPIRIT

Author Unknown

It may leave me radioactive for a little while and feeling a bit sorry for myself. It may even eventually destroy my body, but as the poem says, it cannot conquer MY SPIRIT!

As the old saying goes, “This too shall pass!” Two more days and I’ll be free again!