Personal style

Dressing for the holiday season

/ edebock / 4 Comments

I used to think that dressing for Christmas events meant putting together festive outfits that incorporated sequins, glitter, metallics, satiny fabrics or velvet in holiday colours like red, green, or gold. But what if that’s not you? If glitz and glam is your thing, then by all means, indulge your inner princess, but if it’s not, don’t try to be someone you’re not. I’m here to tell you that dressing for the holidays shouldn’t turn you into a completely different person. Instead, consider your style personality, how you like to dress the rest of the year, then elevate it slightly to make it appropriate for the holiday events you’ll be attending.  

I’ve written about style adjectives many times before. These are three to five descriptive words that describe your personal style and help you create outfits that say what you want to say about yourself. My adjectives are classy, casual, comfortable, confident, and authentic. In creating outfits for Christmas events, I might want to play into the classy aspect of my style a bit more than the casual side, but I definitely want to be authentic; true to who I am as opposed to trying to look like someone I’m not.  

Holiday outfits should feel special, but they don’t have to involve buying dozens of Christmassy pieces that will languish in your closet eleven months of the year. Instead, look at what’s already in your closet that might lean toward festive with the addition of the right accessories. A black skirt or pants paired with a cream or red sweater could form the basis of an outfit that would be appropriate for most Christmas occasions. Add some glittery earrings or a festive brooch, a dressy handbag, and the right shoes or boots and you’re ready to go. 

Now let’s look at what I wore for the one Christmas event that I’ve attended so far, a ladies banquet and fashion show. Since my style uniform throughout the winter months often consists of jeans, a pullover top, and a third piece, it was easy to follow the same formula but dress it up with pieces that have been in my closet for several years.

The black pants are left over from my teaching days, so they’re probably 20 years old or more! They were hidden away in storage for many years when wide legs were out of style; one of the few times that I was smart enough to hang onto something until a trend returned! Now they’re my go-to pants when I need something dressy. The simple sleeveless top has also been around for years. It’s one of those sparkly items that only comes out at this time of year and adds a Christmassy feel to the outfit. The cozy sweater jacket was thrifted several winters ago. I knew that it would keep me warm even if the venue was a bit cool. I accessorized the outfit with a simple black belt, black booties, and a pair of sparkly earrings.  

Before I close, I want to thank everyone for the very kind responses to last week’s post that were left here on the blog or on Facebook. I appreciated them so much! ❤ I’m happy to report that I’m feeling much better now. My appetite has returned and my energy level is improving day by day. I’m still committed to keeping Christmas simple this year though! 

10 fashion mistakes and what to do about them

/ edebock / 1 Comment

As I wrote in this post three years ago, I don’t follow fashion rules. Instead, I believe in wearing what makes you feel comfortable and confident. I do believe, however, that many of us make fashion mistakes that keep us from feeling great in what we wear. Today, let’s take a look at 10 of those mistakes and what to do about them.

Not knowing your personal style

It’s important to dress in a way that reflects your personality and says what you want to say about yourself. As I’ve written before, one way to identify your personal style is to choose 3 to 5 adjectives to guide your fashion choices. My style adjectives are classy, casual, comfortable, confident, and authentic. When I look in the mirror, I’m happiest when my outfit ticks all five boxes.

Not wearing the right colours for your skin tone

Knowing whether your skin has cool or warm undertones can help you choose colours that are best for you. A personal colour analysis can help, of course, but an easy way to figure this out is to look at the veins on the inside of your wrist. Do they look blue or green? If they appear more blue, you are cool-toned; if they’re more green, you’re warm-toned. If you are cool-toned, bright blues, deep purples, emerald greens, and frosty shades of lavender, ice blue, and pink will look good on you. If you’re warm-toned, think fiery reds, peach, coral, oranges and rusty tones, creams, camel, and earth tones. While sticking to a specific colour palette might seem restrictive, knowing which colours make you come alive and which, especially when they’re worn close to your face, make you look tired or washed out, can definitely help you look your best.

Buying things you don’t love

Shopping with friends can be a lot of fun, but their taste might be different than yours. Consider their advice, but resist buying something that they like unless you know that it’s actually right for you. Similarly, don’t let the fashion industry dictate what you wear and don’t buy something simply because it’s on sale. Instead, wear what makes your heart sing!

Having a crowded, disorganized closet

If you can’t see what’s in your closet or if it’s full of clothes you don’t actually wear, set aside some time to take everything out, try things on, and decide what to keep and what to donate. Ask yourself: Do I love this? Does it fit my personal style? Is it the right colour for me? What can I wear it with? Do I have too many of these?

Wearing the wrong undergarments

Undergarments are the foundation that an outfit is built on. Prioritize comfort and fit. Consider going for a professional bra fitting to ensure that you’re wearing the right size. In addition to enhancing how your clothes look, a proper fit provides essential support that can reduce back, shoulder, and neck pain.

Buying quantity over quality

In addition to being terrible for the environment, fast fashion is usually characterized by shoddy workmanship and low quality fabrics that will cheapen your look. Buying fewer, better quality pieces will give you a more polished appearance and if you consider cost per wear, will also be the wiser choice financially.

Wearing clothes that don’t fit well

Oversized clothes look frumpy and clothing that’s too tight looks uncomfortable and shows off bits and bulges that are better left unseen. If you shop online, use a measuring tape and pay close attention to sizing charts. When shopping in person, try everything on and if possible, look in a three way mirror. Make sure shoulders seams align properly and buttons don’t pull. Horizontal lines in the crotch area indicate that pants are too small. When you get the fit right, your clothes will skim over your body and you’ll feel comfortable.

Sacrificing comfort for style

It isn’t necessary to choose between comfort and style, but comfort is of paramount importance in choosing what to wear. This is especially true of footwear. It’s almost impossible to look good when your feet are killing you!

Trying to follow every fashion trend

Not every trend will suit your personal style or body type. Instead, invest in quality basics that stand the test of time and add occasional trends that fit your aesthetic.

Wearing too many or not enough accessories

Accessories are the finishing touches that can take an outfit from drab to dramatic. Almost any outfit will benefit from a few carefully chosen accessories, but too many will look tacky and overwhelm your look. If you like bold jewelry, choose one statement piece and let it take centre stage while keeping other jewelry understated.

Can you think of any other fashion mistakes?

Live with it and love it

/ edebock / 2 Comments

My baby turned 40 this week. In fact, because my “Irish twins” are less than a year apart in age, his sister is also 40! And they’re my youngest! Is it any wonder that I’ve been thinking about age this week? Either I’m getting old or they’re catching up to me!

336358370_582284853962633_6373513576877374433_n 2

In reality, I’m not bothered by my age. Surprised maybe. Time seems to have gone by so quickly. But bothered? No.

For as long as I can remember, advertising has been hoodwinking women into believing that we lose value as we age; that our goal in life should be to hang on to youth or the appearance of youth for as long as we can. Hogwash! I like what Helen Mirren, who celebrated her 79th birthday this week, had to say about age. “At every age, you lose some things but you gain other things. That’s the kind of magic that happens, so deal with it. You either die young, or you get old. Enjoy the ride!” In this short video she says her age has always been an asset and her advice is to all of us is to “live with it and love it.”

While I’m happy to be the age that I am, especially considering the fact that when I was first diagnosed with cancer I had no expectation that I would live this long, that doesn’t mean that I want to look old. I just don’t want to waste my time and energy trying to look young when I’m not. I simply want to be my authentic self, a woman in her 70s who loves life and hasn’t given up on herself. I’m sure that many of you can identify with that. 

So how do we accomplish this? Thinking about what you want your appearance to say about you and choosing 3 to 5 adjectives to describe your personal style can be very helpful in building a look that conveys the right message. You can read about how I arrived at my 5 style adjectives here. 

Logo

To tuck or not to tuck

/ edebock / 2 Comments

logo-by-samRecently, a reader commenting on one of the fashion blogs that I follow suggested that the blogger consider tucking in her blouse because, in her words, it would reduce the “frump factor”. The blogger took exception to being told that she looked frumpy and responded by devoting part of her next post to the topic. She pointed out that tucking tops in doesn’t necessarily work for everyone and that many very stylish women choose not to tuck. That post resulted in a lengthy discussion amongst her readers and inspired me to write today’s post. So, with apologies to Shakespeare, to tuck or not to tuck, that is the question!

I very rarely tuck my tops in. The quality of the photos isn’t great, but I’ll let them speak for themselves. This is just a simple jeans and t-shirt outfit that I’d wear around home, but I think it’s sufficient to make my point. 

For me, to tuck or not to tuck has a lot to do with body type. I’m tall and thin, but I have a boyish figure with a wide waist and narrow hips. To top that off, as is true of most women who are midlife or beyond, I have some extra me around the middle. Leaving my top untucked tricks the eye and makes that less noticeable. To see what I mean, look at the line between my t-shirt and pants in the photos. When my top is tucked in, your eye is drawn to my waist, the area that I don’t want to emphasize, but leaving it untucked draws your attention away from that area. An important key to making this work is to choose a top that drifts over the body instead of clinging to it and showing every bulge. 

When I do tuck in my top, I usually wear a third piece over it as I’m doing in this photo from a recent post. This actually has a narrowing effect as only a small portion of the line between my top and pants shows.

IMG_6915 

When it comes down to it though, to tuck or not to tuck is a personal choice. There is no right or wrong answer. That’s why we call it “personal” style. 

Why I write about fashion

/ edebock / 7 Comments

logo-by-samLately, especially on weeks like this one when writer’s block seems to have set in and I have a hard time thinking of a topic for Friday’s post, I’ve been pondering why it is that I choose to write about fashion. After all, I was the awkward teen with zero fashion sense who, even when I stretched my babysitting and allowance dollars to buy what the “in” girls were wearing, felt self-consciously out of place and wanted to fade into the background. Fashion just wasn’t my thing and I certainly had no idea back then that there was such a thing as personal style or style adjectives. 

It wasn’t until about 15 years ago when fashion blogging became popular, that I began to take an interest in the topic. In those days, it was mainly seen as a hobby, a way for fashion enthusiasts to share their thoughts and ideas with the world. Eventually, after following several of these blogs for awhile, I found myself looking for a topic that would keep my blog active when I didn’t have anything more exciting (aka travel) to write about. Why not try my hand at fashion, I thought, and Fashion Friday was born!

With the passage of time, fashion blogging has changed. Some of the blogs that I originally followed eventually disappeared, but as others became more visible and gained a greater following, opportunities to monetize arose. Advertisers and brands began to recognize the value of these voices and reached out to engage with them. At first, popular bloggers were offered free merchandise in exchange for positive reviews, but as time went by they started to earn commission on items that were purchased through links on their blogs. Some even saw this as an opportunity to make fashion blogging a full-time career.  

I’ve never had any desire to move in that direction. I’m still very firmly in the blogging as a hobby camp and the more I see, the happier I am to stay there. One of the bloggers that I’ve been following for many years recently wrote about the fact that she never buys any clothing for herself that she can’t link to on her blog. As a result, her personal style has taken a hit and where she once found joy in fashion, she no longer does. On a recent trip, she visited several local boutiques and had the opportunity to buy some unique pieces, but didn’t because she couldn’t earn income from them. How sad! Others lament the fact that they no longer feel free to be their authentic selves. Instead they’ve created an image that they need to keep up and, in some cases, it’s taking a toll on their mental and emotional health. 

So why do I continue to write about fashion? I sometimes wonder if it isn’t a bit narcissistic, but I try to avoid too many “look at me” posts by also delving into a variety of fashion related topics like sustainability and shopping ethically. I’ve learned a lot about the fashion industry, but also about myself. I’ve figured out what my personal style is. I know what I want my clothing to say about me and I’ve chosen the appropriate adjectives to help me build the right wardrobe. These are the kinds of things that I want to share with you, my readers. After all, connecting with other women with a common interest and being part of this community has been the best part of writing about fashion! That’s really what keeps me doing this. 

Throughout the summer, however, I will be indulging some of my other passions… camping, hiking, kayaking, and visiting with family. I have no more medical appointments until the middle of August and I intend to take full advantage of that! For significant periods of time, I will be without internet access. I’ll blog when and where I’m able, but it will be sporadic and there will be some weeks when Fashion Friday doesn’t appear. Don’t go away though. It will be back!   

 

How to dress for confidence

/ edebock / 1 Comment

Logo by SamIn last Friday’s post about fighting invisibility with fashion, I wrote that we should wear what makes us feel confident, but how do we do that? To begin with, let’s think about what we mean by confidence. An article in Psychology Today, defines it as “a belief in oneself, the conviction that one has the ability to meet life’s challenges and to succeed – and the willingness to act accordingly.” It went on to say that projecting confidence helps us gain credibility, make strong first impressions, deal with pressure, and tackle personal and professional challenges. It also helps put other people at ease. So, what does all this have to do with how we dress?

I-have-always-believed-that-fashion-was-not-only-to-make-women-more-beautiful-but-also-to-reassure-them-give-them-confidence.-1

When you know that what you’re wearing looks good, it’s empowering. It gives you a sense of confidence and strength. It makes you feel like your best self and helps you hold your head a little bit higher. In psychology, this idea that what we wear influences who we are or how we think, act, or feel is called enclothed cognition.

Style confidence is something you can learn. Here are ten tips to help you dress confidently:

1.  Know which colours look best on you. 

Knowing whether your skin has cool or warm undertones can help in choosing the colours that are best for you. An easy way to figure this out is to look at the veins on the inside of your wrist. Do they look blue or green? If they appear more blue, you are cool-toned; if they’re more green, you’re warm-toned. The study of colour can be a complex one, but essentially, if you are cool-toned, take your inspiration from the cool end of the spectrum. Bright blues, deep purples, emerald greens, and frosty shades of lavender, ice blue, and pink will look good on you. If you’re warm-toned, look to the warm end of the spectrum for your best colours. Think fiery reds, peach, coral, oranges and rusty tones, creams, camel, and earth tones.

2.  Know your body type.

female_bodytypes

While exercise and healthy eating can make some difference, your body shape depends largely on genetics and skeletal structure. A quick search online will result in many videos and articles to help you dress to flatter your unique shape. Designer, Justine Leconte, created a video series on this topic several years ago. You can find the introductory video here and then go from there to explore your own body type.

3.  Emphasize your best features and play down your least favourite. 

This tip goes hand in hand with the previous one. Once you’ve identified your body type, consider which of your features you’d like to highlight and which you’d prefer to draw attention away from. For example, if your waistline is one of your best features, you may want to show it off by tucking in your top and wearing an eye-catching belt. I, on the other hand, have a rectangular body shape with very little definition at the waist. Add the thickening of that region that invariably seems to come with age, and that’s a part of my body that I’d rather not emphasize.

4.  Know your personal style. 

Style is how we personalize what the fashion industry produces. One way to identify your personal style is to choose 3 to 5 adjectives to guide your fashion choices. Check here for an exercise that will help you do that. Pinterest is another excellent tool to help you identify or clarify your own style. This post will show you how that works.

5.  Dress for the occasion. 

When it comes to clothing, we seem to have become an anything goes society, but you will definitely feel more confident when you dress appropriately. That doesn’t mean following a bunch of archaic fashion rules, but simply being sensitive to the occasion and the location. For example, if you’re going to a job interview, find out what type of company it is and what the work environment is like, then dress accordingly. For any event, when in doubt, I recommend erring on the dressier side.

6.  Wear what you feel most comfortable in. 

I mean that literally. If you find walking in high heels uncomfortable, choose flatter shoes. If a particular fabric is uncomfortable against your skin, avoid it. If something feels too tight, don’t wear it. In my opinion, comfort is key to feeling good in what we wear.  As far as styles go, while I encourage you to step outside your comfort zone and try new looks, if something is going to make you feel self-conscious or uncomfortable, don’t wear it.

7.  Get rid of clothes that make you feel second-rate. 

If there are pieces in your closet that don’t fit, aren’t the right colour for you, don’t suit your body type or your personal style, or that make you feel uncomfortable, now is the time to move them out! Reserve the space in your closet for things that make you happy.

8.  Don’t try to copy someone else or be someone you aren’t. 

Don’t compare yourself to others or try to copy them. Take inspiration from women whose style you admire, but be yourself. Mimicking someone else won’t give you the confidence you’re looking for.

9.  Don’t be so hard on yourself. 

What do you say to yourself when you look in the mirror? What negative thoughts do you repeat about yourself? A woman who values herself accepts and appreciates who she is, including her imperfections, so stop beating yourself up! Instead, practice positive and respectful self-talk.

10.  Wear what you love, not what anyone else tells you you should wear. 

Shopping with friends can be a lot of fun, but their taste might be different than yours. Consider their advice, but resist buying something that they like unless you know that it’s actually right for you. Similarly, don’t let the fashion industry dictate what you wear. As I said in my last post, wear what makes your heart sing!

Personal style types

/ edebock / 2 Comments

Logo by SamAfter thinking about personal style last week, I thought I’d explore the topic in a little more depth today by looking at some of the most common style types. Each one of us is unique and it’s unlikely that you will fit cleanly into any one of these styles. Instead, you might take inspiration from more than one of them and by combining traits that resonate with you, identify your own personal style.

Sporty  This is the woman who feels at home in athleisure wear. She wants clothing that is casual, comfortable, and allows ease of movement. She might be seen wearing yoga pants, joggers, or leggings with a t-shirt or a hoodie. Her shoes will be sneakers or flats and her accessories minimal. 

Casual.  Similar to her sporty sister, the casual woman likes simple lines and designs. She is focused on comfort and her look is easy-going and relaxed. She wears jeans, t-shirts, sweaters, and sneakers or flat boots with minimal accessories.

Classic  The Classic woman chooses tailored garments in quality fabrics and timeless styles. Her menswear inspired look is polished and put-together. Her wardrobe will include blazers and pencil skirts in neutral colours. Her accessories are simple and complement her outfits.

Dramatic  This is the elegant woman who invests in quality pieces for her wardrobe. Her look is striking and sophisticated. She wears bold makeup, eye catching shoes, and statement jewelry.

Preppy  Originally inspired by North American prep school uniforms, this look includes khakis and chinos, polo and button-down shirts, pleated skirts, blazers, vests, stripes, plaids, and all things nautical. Loafers are a popular shoe choice. Accessories are simple and often involve pearls.

Bohemian  The flamboyant Boho style has a 1960s and early 70s hippie aesthetic. It has a loose, laid back vibe that includes flowing maxi dresses and long skirts in natural fabrics, earth tones, and ethnic prints. Garments are often embellished with fringes, beads, or feathers. Accessories include large brimmed hats, slouchy handbags, oversized scarves, wide belts, long necklaces, big rings, and chunky bracelets. This is a style that often appeals to the artistic non-conformist.

Artistic  The Artistic or Creative woman is another innovative individual who doesn’t mind being a bit unconventional. She wears unique outfits in a variety of bright, bold colours and prints. She also likes to play with unusual shapes, silhouettes, and textures. She wears bold jewelry and statement footwear.

Romantic  This is the woman who chooses soft, flowy garments with pretty, feminine details including ruffles, bows, and lace. She wears muted or pastel colours and floral prints. She likes delicate, traditional accessories and ballet flats.

Minimalist  The title refers to a particular style, not the number of clothes in this woman’s closet. The Minimalist likes a paired down look with clean simple lines. She most often wears classic neutral colours and chooses simple, sparse accessories.

This is by no means an exhaustive list. I wrote about Gentlewoman style in this post and the very trendy Coastal Grandmother style here. There are Grunge and Goth styles, but since they wouldn’t likely appeal to the demographic that usually reads this blog, I didn’t include them. Then there is the Eclectic woman. She loves to try new styles and combinations and mixes elements from many different styles to create one that is uniquely her own.

The photos that I’ve included are a very limited sampling of each style, but hopefully they are enough to give you an idea what each one looks like.

Do you see yourself somewhere in the list? As I mentioned in the introduction, you will likely fit into more than one category. For example, I see myself as a Casual/Classic dresser, but I occasionally incorporate elements from several other styles.

Thinking about personal style

/ edebock / 4 Comments

Logo by SamHubby and I spent three days this week attending a conference as representatives of our local church. It was a full schedule of making connections, worshipping together, and attending sessions. There was no down time, no time for writing a blog post! We came home yesterday feeling both uplifted and exhausted! I sat down last night to write this morning’s Fashion Friday post and absolutely nothing came to mind! Nothing except the desire to soak in a hot bath and crawl into bed. All this to explain why today’s post is later than usual and why it might be a little thin in content!

We often tend to use the words fashion and style interchangeably, but there’s a difference between the two. Fashion is the clothes, accessories and shoes that are produced. They are what you see when you enter a store or shop online, but style is what you do with them, the way in which you wear those items.

433d67c8a179d2f32e67c87f8df403b4

Style is how we personalize what the fashion industry produces.

279263470_3265720087087580_3069265874297079993_n

One way to identify your personal style is to choose 3 to 5 adjectives to guide your fashion choices. Check here for an exercise that will help you do that. Pinterest is another excellent tool to help you identify or clarify your own style. This post will show you how that works.

68c1c89e8f2ddbbff03d37530bd1757b

Personal style shouldn’t be static. We all change as we go through different stages of life and our style needs to change with us. It’s important to evaluate and update our style from time to time so that our outfits express who we are today, not who we were sometime in the past.

What words would you use to describe your personal style? How has your style changed over the years?

Who’s your style icon?

/ edebock / 5 Comments

LogoIs there someone whose style you admire or whose outfits you love? She could be a movie star, a character in your favourite show, a colleague, a next door neighbour, or even your sister or your mother. What is it about her style that resonates with you?

I get a lot of inspiration from the fashion blogs that I follow. I’ve provided links to several of my favourites here and here. Some of them have a similar personal style to my own.

Last Friday I wrote about how to use Pinterest to help you find your own personal style. As I added images to my style board, I noticed that photos of Kate Middleton kept cropping up. That’s when I realized that, in spite of the fact that she’s young enough to be my daughter and we don’t look anything alike, we have a similar personal style. She wears the same classy casual look that I admire and strive for. If you can identify someone whose style is similar to yours, you can use them as inspiration for outfits of your own. Again, shop your closet. Don’t try to copy your muse exactly. Instead, take ideas from her look and see if you can make them work for you.

Here’s an example of how I tried to emulate one of Kate Middleton’s looks using items from my own closet. The jacket is new and I hadn’t worn it this way before. Without Kate’s inspiration, I might never have thought to.

She looks like she’s saying, “Hey, look at you! I like your style!”

How to identify your personal style

/ edebock / 10 Comments

LogoOne of my fashion goals for 2019 is to resist the pressure of friends or family to buy clothing that they like, but that isn’t right for me. The only way that I can accomplish that is to know what is right for me; to know my own personal style. I’ve had a pretty good idea what I like and don’t like and what looks good on me for a long time, but I wanted to further clarify that. As it turns out, Pinterest is the perfect tool to do that. If you’re new to Pinterest, you can find a simple tutorial to help you get started here.

So, how can you use Pinterest to identify your own personal style? First, create a virtual bulletin board, simply called a board on Pinterest, and begin pinning images of styles that you like, that you think you would be comfortable wearing, that might convey the kind of message you want to send about yourself.

433d67c8a179d2f32e67c87f8df403b4

Once you have a collection of images, look for common elements. These might include colour, cut, prints or solids, timeless or trendy, minimalist or extravagant, accessories, and footwear.

Now, before you decide that you need to go shopping for a whole new wardrobe, shop your own closet. Which of the style elements that you’ve identified are already there? Using the images on your board as inspiration, try putting the things you already own together in new and different ways. Have fun developing your own personal style, a style that tells people who you are!

Here are a sample of the photos that I’ve pinned to my “My Style” board.

It’s easy to see that some of my common elements include:

  • neutral colours (grey, navy, cream, beige, khaki)
  • classy, but casual
  • comfortable fit
  • solid colours, Breton stripes, occasional prints
  • hats!
  • flat shoes, sneakers, and boots

Now let’s look at how I used pieces from my closet to create a look that fits my classy, but casual style.

img_6794

In this outfit,  I incorporated neutral colours (dark navy, grey, and white) and Breton stripes, comfy casual fit, and flat shoes. I added a pop of colour (burgundy) and pattern mixing with the scarf and shoes. Most important of all, I feel like me when I’m dressed like this because it fits my personal style.