One word for 2020

January 1, 2020December 30, 2019 / edebock / 5 Comments

Three years ago, as part of a ministry that I was involved in, I was asked to choose one word to inspire or guide me in the coming year and to choose a scripture verse to go with it. As a lover of words, this was a perfect assignment for me and one that I’ve repeated each year since then. My word for 2017 was Still, for 2018 I chose Grace, and last year my word was Inspire. There’s actually a whole #OneWord365 movement on the internet urging members to choose just one word to focus on every day, all year long; a word that sums up who they want to be or how they want to live.

The weekly Bible study that I do with a small group of women from my church pointed me toward the word that I’ve chosen for 2020: Bold. The study, Legacy: How One Ordinary Life Can Make an Eternal Difference with Jackie Green and Lauren Green McAfee, points out that being bold is vital to leaving a spiritual legacy. According to the study, “being bold doesn’t mean breaking rules or social conventions just for the sake of being a rule breaker. It’s not about demanding your own way. It’s not about having a sense of entitlement. Rather, biblical boldness is about speaking the truth even when it’s unpopular. The bold act without worrying about what other people think or say because they have confidence in following a higher standard. The bold are willing to break with tradition.”

The dictionary defines bold as showing an ability to take risks; confident and courageous.

“Bold people stand out from the group. They are confident, courageous, and directed.” says Kevin Daum, author, columnist, entrepreneurship coach, marketer and speaker in a post entitled 7 Things Really Bold People Do. “People who choose to be bold are inspiring not just because they get big things accomplished, but because they also instigate growth, progress, and movement for themselves and others around them.” That definitely resonated with me considering that my word for the past year was Inspire.

The Bible verse that I selected to go with this year’s word is Proverbs 28:1. “The wicked flee though no one pursues, but the righteous are as bold as a lion.” Known as the king of the beasts, the mighty lion is regal and fearless. With a roar that can be heard from more than 5 miles (8 km) away, he’s a symbol of fearlessness, strength and invincibility.

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So how do you blend boldness with grace? How do you act boldly without being abrasive? How do you speak up for what you believe in or what you know to be true without sounding arrogant and turning people off? These are the questions that I’m wrestling with as I enter the new year.

I want to have the boldness of the early disciples who shared their faith in spite of great opposition. I want to have the courage to confront injustice and stand up for the downtrodden. I want to be bold enough to reach out to the woman weeping in the ladies room at the cancer clinic instead of just saying a silent prayer for her.

So how am I, a naturally shy and introverted person, going to learn to act with greater boldness? One recommendation that I read suggested that I pretend that I’m already bold, ask myself what I’d do if I was, and then act accordingly. That’s what I’m determined to do this coming year.

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What about you? Can you think of one word to inspire or guide you in the new year?

One word for 2019

January 1, 2019December 31, 2018 / edebock / 5 Comments

After choosing one word to guide me each of the past two years, I’ve been thinking hard for awhile now about what word to choose for 2019. My word for 2017 was Still and for 2018 I chose Grace. I was absolutely amazed over the past year at how often and in how many different contexts the word grace cropped up. It was even chosen as part of the name of an new online ministry to hurting women that I’m involved in, Renewal By Grace!

As a lover of words, choosing one word for each year is a perfect exercise for me. There’s even a whole #OneWord365 movement on the internet urging members to choose just one word to focus on every day, all year long; a word that sums up who they want to be or how they want to live.

After considering and rejecting numerous possibilities for the coming year, I finally settled on Inspire.

It took awhile for me to accept that inspire was an appropriate choice. At first I wondered if it was arrogant to want to be an inspiration to other people. After all, one of the characteristics of a woman of grace is humility. Would choosing inspire as my word for 2019 be the opposite of that?

In addition to choosing a word each year, I select a scripture verse to go along with it. When I searched for a Bible verse about inspiring others, I found many about being an encourager. Encourage is, after all, a synonym for inspire. That convinced me that the word I’d chosen was, in fact, an acceptable one. The scripture passage that I chose is very simple. The first part of 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up.” It’s not a stretch to imagine that saying “Therefore inspire one another…”

Once I settled on my word, I began to think about why I’d chosen it. Why do I want to be an inspiration and to whom? Perhaps it’s the teacher in me. After all, much of what a teacher does is to try to inspire his or her students to learn, to grow, to become all that they can be. Perhaps it’s also the desire to live a life of significance even in retirement.

before I expire

As I think about being an inspiration to others, I’m reminded of the verses in Titus 3 that urge older women to be an example to younger women and to teach them the ways of godliness. My life is full of younger women… daughters, friends, students past and present, even some I’ve never met but who read my blog regularly. I am often inspired by them. Perhaps I can also be an inspiration to them this coming year through the words I say, the things I write, and the way I live my life.

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Have you ever thought of choosing one word to guide you through a new year? Can I inspire you to give it a try? Happy New Year!

Sometimes it’s hard to be humble

March 14, 2018March 14, 2018 / edebock / 5 Comments

One of the characteristics of grace listed in yesterday’s post was “acts with humility, not pride.” As I pondered my One Word for 2018 and asked myself how I’m doing at becoming a woman of grace, I was also challenged to examine myself and wonder how I measure up in the area of humility.

The Bible has plenty to say about being humble. The book of Proverbs contains many warnings for those who refuse to put others before themselves and both the Old and New Testaments tell of blessings for those who do. Colossians 3:12 has become my life guide. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

There’s an old country and western song that says, “Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every way!” I’ve also heard it said that if you think you’re humble, you probably aren’t. So how can we know if we’re humble or not?

After much reading and pondering, I came up with the following 20 characteristics of a humble person. I’m sure it’s not exhaustive, but I think it’s a reasonably good checklist.

A humble person…

is not boastful
is able to set aside personal preferences for the sake of others
treats others with respect
is not easily offended
is grateful for what they have
is able to rejoice with others
is not wise in their own eyes
is teachable
is able to seek advice or ask for help
willingly serves other people without drawing attention to themselves
accepts their own limitations
accepts correction without becoming defensive
takes responsibility for their actions and apologizes when wrong
is merciful, forgiving quickly and not holding grudges
doesn’t get frustrated with the weaknesses of others
is self-controlled
listens to others and doesn’t feel the need to speak their mind in every situation
is comfortable allowing others to have centre stage
doesn’t always have to be right
doesn’t insist on their own way

In a “me first” world, it isn’t always easy to be humble and there are many misconceptions about what it means. In the same way that being gracious is not the same as being wishy-washy or weak-kneed, humility is not a sign of weakness. Being humble is not belittling or undervaluing oneself, nor is it an indication of poor self-esteem. Like grace, humility is actually a strength.

Humility

Growing in grace

March 13, 2018 / edebock / 1 Comment

With a thick blanket of snow still on the ground, it’s hard to believe that it’s the middle of March already. We’re two and a half months into a new year and an incident this week reminded me of my One Word for 2018.

Grace.

How am I doing? My initial response indicated to me that I still have some growing to do in order to become the woman of grace that I would like to be. It also prompted me to think about what that woman would look like. How would she respond in challenging situations where it’s sometimes difficult to show grace?

Almost three years ago, Christian author, speaker, and Bible teacher, Kathy Howard, penned this list of 15 characteristics of grace (compiled from passages in Ephesians and 1 Corinthians) on her blog.

A person of grace…

Doesn’t insist on being right, but seeks to make things right
Is willing to be inconvenienced
Seeks the welfare of the other person
Speaks words that build up, not tear down
Doesn’t demand to be heard, but strives to listen
Focuses on others needs instead of their own
Acts with humility, not pride
Doesn’t keep score
Looks for ways to help and encourage others
Freely forgives
Seeks to understand
Doesn’t expect a return
Focuses on the important over the urgent
Doesn’t pick and choose whom to show grace
Doesn’t overlook sin, but encourages holiness

I would also add…

16. Doesn’t always have to have the last word

After this week’s incident, I think perhaps I need to focus on #4. I consider myself quite gifted with words, but it’s a gift that can be used positively or negatively. I can speak life or condemnation. It’s pretty easy for me to write a scathing response to something that irritates or upsets me, but as a person of grace I would choose to use gentler words.

Does this mean that a gracious person is wishy-washy? Absolutely not! It’s entirely possible to be strong, even assertive, and yet still be gracious. Jesus was a perfect example.

That thought brings me to #7, another area for self-examination. Humility. But that will be the topic of another post.

grace not perfection

One word for 2018

January 10, 2018January 10, 2018 / edebock / 12 Comments

A year ago, as part of a ministry that I was involved in, I was asked to choose one word to inspire or guide me in the coming year and to choose a scripture verse to go along with it. As a lover of words, this was a perfect assignment for me! I have since learned that there’s a whole #OneWord365 movement on the internet urging members to choose just one word to focus on every day, all year long; a word that sums up who they want to be or how they want to live.

Last year, my one word was still and the Bible verse I chose to accompany it was Psalm 46:10. “Be still and know that I am God.”

This year, I decided to repeat the exercise with a new word for 2018. After much consideration, I chose the word grace. I would like to be known and remembered as a woman of grace. The scripture passage that has become my life guide in recent times is Colossians 3:12. Though it doesn’t actually use the word, I think it epitomizes grace. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

There are, of course, many Bible verses that do include the word grace. One that comes quickly to mind, especially so close on the heels of the Christmas season, is John 1:14. “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” Christ was full of grace! I want this to be a year when I become a little more like Him; a little more compassionate, kind, humble, gentle and patient. This year, I want to be intentional (that’s another word I considered as my one word for 2018) about offering grace to other people in practical ways.

In order to do that, I also need to look at what grace is not. Grace is not simply being nice. It’s not a peace at all costs, everything’s okay, and who am I to judge mentality. Sometimes grace includes confronting difficult issues and not shying away from controversial subjects. Sometimes it means talking honestly about the ugly, painful, and sordid struggles in our lives. It is honouring the dignity of others even when I don’t agree with them or their choices. Thankfully, offering this kind of grace is not something that I have to figure out how to do on my own.

When C.S. Lewis was asked to identify the one thing about Christianity that sets it apart from all other religions, he responded, ″Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.″ Biblical grace is the unmerited favour of God bestowed freely on all who choose to access it by accepting Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour. This year and every year, I can rest in God’s gentle, extravagant, audacious grace, knowing that He is God Almighty and I am His beloved daughter. It is He who enables me to offer grace to others.

“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

One Word 2018

What about you? Can you think of one word to inspire or guide you in this new year?

Aging with grayce

May 6, 2016April 27, 2016 / edebock / 8 Comments

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Why is it that gray hair on a man is often considered sexy or sophisticated? Think Richard Richard Gere Gere, ladies!

Women, on the other hand, have long felt tremendous societal pressure to cover their gray. Amazing amounts of time and money are spent fending off the effects of time and trying to hang onto a coveted youthful ideal. Recently, the lovely young Duchess of Cambridge was chastised in the press for allowing a few strands of gray to appear in her lustrous brunette mane!

Times and trends are changing though and even some well known actresses and models are choosing to embrace their gray. Far from looking old and washed out, these gals are stunning!

Jamie Lee Curtis

I’ve always loved Jamie Lee Curtis’ short pixie cut and doesn’t it look great in pewter?

Kori Hendrix

Here’s Kori Hendrix, a Texas realtor and model. Isn’t she gorgeous?

In days gone by, it was thought that women who did let their hair go gray should at least keep it short, but not anymore! Look at the flowing locks on these beauties!

Ingrid Becker

In her late 60s, Ingrid Becker is a top German model.

Model Cindy Joseph

Cindy Joseph, began her career in the late 1970s working as a make-up artist for fashion and beauty photographers. In 1999, at the age of 49, she was approached on the street by a casting agent and asked to model for a Dolce and Gabbana ad campaign. That ignited her modeling career with Ford Models Inc., which continues to flourish today at age 66.
Nicola Griffin 2

Nicola Griffin also came to modelling later in life. A middle-aged single mother from Nottingham, England, who ran a business organizing student exchange trips, Griffin was standing in line at the bank with her twin daughters when a stranger representing a hair product company asked her if she’d be willing to model for the company’s latest campaign. She was sceptical, but her teenage daughters urged her to give it a try. That quickly led to other modelling jobs and at age 56, she became the oldest woman ever to model for the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue!

Born in France in December of 1955, Yasmina Rossi is both a grandmother and a highly sought after model who still looks good in a bikini!

“My hair started turning gray when I was 12 and was salt-and-pepper by the time I hit 20,” says Rossi. “I never colored it, because I knew it was my best asset.”

Yasmina Rossi Model age 59

Yasmina Rossi

Who says gray can’t be sexy and sophisticated?

My first strands of gray began to appear when I was in my mid 40s. I distinctly remember sitting at the dinner table between my oldest son and his friend, both in their teens and both towering over me in height. Looking down at my head, my son commented on the fact that I was getting quite a few gray hairs. “That’s not gray hair,” his friend responded. “Those are silver highlights!” I always did love that boy!

Going gray has been a very slow process. Almost twenty years after that dinner table conversation, my hair still looks more brown than gray in photos. I don’t remember where I first saw the “aging with grayce” phrase, but I’ve adopted it as my own. I can’t tell you whether you should colour your hair or go au naturel, but I love my silver highlights and I have no desire to hide them. I’m beginning to wonder if I’ll ever go completely gray, but if I do, I hope I can carry it off with as much dignity and grace as the beautiful ladies shown above!