Family

Checking my list

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He’s making a list
And checking it twice;
Gonna find out Who’s naughty and nice
Santa Claus is coming to town! 

Yes, the jolly old elf is a list maker and so am I! My friends tease me about my many lists but I don’t think I could live without them! I have a Christmas To Do list on my computer that I print off and post on the front of the fridge every year. Just in case you don’t have one of your own, here’s an annotated version of mine. The check marks indicate the things that I’ve already accomplished and those things that are crossed out, I don’t have to do this year because we’re going to be at our daughter’s for Christmas.

Christmas shoebox:  (for our sponsored child in Haiti)

  • fill  √
  • mail  √

Sadly, after paying Canada Post more than $27 to mail this to the collection point in Florida, we’ve made the difficult decision not to do this in the future. Instead, we can pay New Missions, the small organization that we sponsor through, $45 to fill a box for us. It will be less personal but with the money we save on postage, we’ll be able to fill a Samaritan’s Purse shoebox for a second needy child.

Shopping:

  • gifts  √
  • stocking stuffers  √
  • cards  √
  • wrapping paper  √
  • ribbon, bows  √
  • tags  √
  • Christmas crackers  √
  • tree

Until last year, we always bought a real tree but now that we’re spending two Christmases out of three in our children’s homes, we have an artificial tabletop tree for those years when we aren’t going to be home.

Wrap gifts

Mail gifts

We did all our shopping for the Vancouver portion of the family while we were at the coast recently. The gifts were bought, wrapped and delivered before we came home so there are none to mail this year. Haha! Canada Post loses this time!

Baking:

  • shortbread
  • nuts & bolts
  • butter tarts
  • macaroons
  • antipasto

I usually make other goodies as well but Christmas just wouldn’t be Christmas at our house without these old standbys. I make the shortbread and the nuts and bolts using the same recipes that my mother used when I was a little girl. The antipasto is a favourite amongst our friends so I’ve increased the amount that I make over the years and several bottles are given as gifts. I haven’t done any baking yet this year but I did buy all the ingredients today. That must count for something!

Christmas cards:

  • write Christmas letter  √
  • print Christmas letter
  • address envelopes
  • write cards
  • mail

Oh darn, Canada Post wins again!

Decorate house

I put out the olive wood nativity set that my parents sent us from Jerusalem the year they spent Christmas there more than a week ago. That’s always the first decoration to come out of storage and although we have many boxes filled with others, it’s really the only one we’d need. After all, it represents what Christmas is really all about.

Take out Christmas mugs & glasses

As retired teachers, we have lots of these received as gifts from our students over the years.

Decorate tree

Buy turkey  √

Crossed out and checked off? How can that be? Well, I don’t have to provide this year’s turkey but I always like to have one in the freezer. We used the last one at Thanksgiving and they were on sale today so I picked up a smallish one to have on hand.

Plan menus

As you can see, I have lots to do over the next couple of weeks! How about you?

Of course, since we’re going away for Christmas, I’ve also started a packing list. I’ll have to remember to add the ski pants that I picked up at the local thrift store this afternoon for just $2, bought especially for playing in the snow with the grandchildren!

On an entirely different note, I received a notification from WordPress this afternoon reminding me that today is my blog’s 5th anniversary! Happy Birthday, Following Augustine! I think I’ll go pour myself a glass of wine to celebrate.

I cast all my cares

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I cast all my cares upon You
I lay all of my burdens down at Your feet
And any time I don’t know what to do
I will cast all my cares upon You.

Almost a month ago, while on our way to my parents’ place, I awoke in the middle of the night and began to worry about what lay ahead. Would I be able to cope? Could I provide the care that they needed? As anxiety threatened to consume me, this old Kelly Willard chorus, based on 1 Peter 5:7 “casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you” (NKJV), began to run through my head.

What a life saver that little chorus became! I knew that in my own strength, I wouldn’t have the wisdom or the patience to do all that needed to be done so I determined right then and there to do exactly as the chorus suggested and lay it all at the feet of Jesus.

Were there times in the last month that I didn’t know what to do? You bet there were but whenever I began to feel overwhelmed, I returned to the little chorus and let it bathe my spirit and restore my peace of mind. It became my mantra. Don’t get me wrong; there wasn’t any magic in the words themselves or the ritual of repeating them but they were my prayer. They reminded me where my help was coming from and calmed my frazzled nerves.

Now we’re on our way home, tucked into the same hotel where anxiety threatened to overwhelm me. In addition to cooking meals, doing mountains of laundry, attending to Mom’s day to day needs, ferrying Dad to numerous appointments and hounding his urologist’s office for a surgery date (Dec. 7), we toured care facilities, arranged respite care for Mom for three weeks following Dad’s surgery and set up Meals on Wheels to begin immediately after we left. I also learned how to change and clean a catheter bag! There were moments of frustration and fortunately, moments of humour, but there were no moments of panic or despair. The cares chorus took care of that!

Looking for gnomes

/ edebock / 9 Comments

After spending the past three weeks caring for my aging parents, we’ve moved across town to our son and daughter-in-law’s for a few days before we head for home. I’m mentally and emotionally worn out and nervous about leaving Mom and Dad on their own and it hasn’t helped that it’s been grey and rainy the entire time that we’ve been in Vancouver. Fun with our grandsons is just the medicine I need at the moment and what could be more delightful than a walk in the woods to look for gnomes?

Twenty-three years ago, when our son, Matt, was in fourth grade, we shared our home with a Norwegian exchange student. Bjorn came to us bearing unique and interesting gifts for each member of the family. The boys received Norwegian trolls about 6 inches tall with mischievous, grinning faces. In recent months, Matthew’s troll took up residence on a shelf in the kitchen of his home. That led to questions from inquisitive 3-year-old Sam and prompted a discussion about gnomes. Searches of the nearby forest followed to see if any of these dwarfish creatures could be found. Yesterday we were invited to go along on one of these adventures!

Could there be a gnome in here?

Or here?

Though we didn’t see any, there must have been one living under this tree because Mommy “found” a teeny, tiny gold key that fits perfectly into the lock of the tiny gnome door that she and Daddy recently installed on the outer wall of the family room! The plan is to put the key back where it was found so that the gnomes can come to visit if they want to.

   

Robin claims that she had absolutely nothing to do with the little gnome gate that we found deeper in the woods. Perhaps, the little people are protecting their food stores from squirrels or maybe they have treasure hidden here!

Our grandsons, Sam and little brother Nate, are fortunate to live just a couple of blocks from the forest and very blessed to have parents who nurture and encourage their active imaginations. Way to go, Matt and Robin!

Operation Parent Care

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When I wondered at the end of a recent post what October would hold, I had no idea that we’d be spending much of it back in Vancouver!

We’ve lived for a long time with the knowledge that we might have to make a quick trip to the coast at any time if something happened to either of my elderly parents. That moment came when my father’s alarmingly large prostate caused a complete urinary blockage about three weeks ago. He also had a urinary infection. My sister, the doctor in the family, flew out first to provide immediate care but she wasn’t able to stay long term. We drove out arriving just a few hours before she had to leave for the airport to return to her family. Having the vehicle here has made it possible for us to ferry Dad to numerous medical appointments and procedures, some related to the prostate problem and some not.

It was with some trepidation that I took over from my sister knowing that in addition to cooking, grocery shopping, laundry and becoming primary caregiver for Mom, who’s in the late stages of Alzheimer’s disease, I’d also be responsible for caring for Dad’s medical needs. Before leaving home, we asked our church family and friends to pray and I have absolutely no doubt that they’ve been doing so. I’m absolutely certain that without those prayers, I would be completely unable to do all that I’ve had to do with any degree of patience or grace. Nothing in life really prepares you for having to clean your father’s catheter twice a day or help your mother change her soiled pants!

By Day 9 of Operation Parent Care, when Mom appeared to have developed a touch of diarrhea, I thought I might have reached the end of my rope. I didn’t know if I could handle another thing. That’s when something in the back of the toilet broke and we had a sudden flood! Water poured from the top of the tank like a mini Niagara. In minutes the bathroom was full of water and it was flowing out the door! Richard waded in, Dad ran (hobbled) off to find a pipe wrench and I called the apartment emergency number. Within minutes a maintenance man arrived at the door like a rescuing angel and in no time at all a powerful shop vac had sucked up most of the water and the toilet’s inner workings had been completely replaced. What could I do but laugh? The tension of the day had definitely been broken and on we went, tiptoeing over dampened carpet for the next 24 hours or so.

Today is Day 12. At this point, we have no idea how long we’ll be here. We do know that Dad requires surgery and that he’ll be catheterized until that takes place. It wasn’t at all comforting to have the specialist assure us that surgery could probably be booked for sometime before Christmas!

Fortunately, Dad’s infection has cleared and he has regained much of his strength. I’m teaching him to care for his own catheter and he’s beginning help with Mom’s care again. Sadly, her condition has deteriorated significantly since we were here just three months ago. My siblings and I are of the opinion that she needs a level of care that can’t really be provided at home, especially by a frail 89-year-old, but I’m not sure how much success we’ll have trying to convince him of that. I hate the idea of leaving them on their own again but what choice do we have. We’ll definitely ensure that someone is here to help when he undergoes surgery but I can’t stay here forever.

Hell’s Gate

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Travelling the gold rush trail included a stop at Hell’s Gate, one of British Columbia’s prime tourist spots. Here, at the narrowest and deepest spot on the Fraser River, towering rock walls plunge toward each other forcing the water through a gorge that’s only 35 metres (110 feet wide).

“We had to travel where no human being should venture for surely we have encountered the gates of hell.”

Today, the river is even narrower at Hell’s Gate than it was in 1808 when the explorer, Simon Fraser, penned those words. During the construction of the Canadian National Railway through the canyon in 1913, blasting triggered a rock slide that partially blocked the river’s path.

We enjoyed breathtaking views as we descended 153 metres (502 feet) into the canyon on the 25-passenger airtram that crosses the river at its narrowest point. Had I not overcome my fear of heights in recent years, I don’t know if I could have done it.

our destination

Though it’s very stable and the side rails are high, I certainly couldn’t have walked across the suspension bridge with it’s open grate floor in my younger days but that’s my shoe, proof that I really did it!

   

  

Hell’s Gate is more than just a tourist attraction. The 1913 rock slide resulted in a dramatic drop in the salmon run up the river at spawning time. It took 30 years of work by dedicated scientists and several years of construction to repair the damage. Now, Hell’s Gate fishways, built by a joint Canadian – United States Commission stands as monument to man’s dedication and ingenuity and once again allows the salmon to migrate upstream to their spawning grounds.

Just upriver from Hell’s Gate, we stopped at the small community of Boston Bar to photograph a different sort of aerial tram. Dangling high above the mighty Fraser River on cables that were 366 metres (1200 feet) long, the North Bend Aerial Ferry transported passengers and vehicles across the river for 45 years. I remember watching my family cross on this contraption in the mid 1960s. I thought they were crazy and refused to go with them. I still remember standing on solid ground convinced that I was about to become an orphan! Fortunately, my family lived to tell the tale and the aerial ferry continued to operate without incident until a bridge was built in 1985.

Summer memories

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We’ve made a lot of good memories this summer, many of them with our grandchildren. We had a great time visiting Drew and Jami-Lee in Calgary in June and Sam and Nate in Vancouver in July. Many hours were spent reading stories, playing with toys, visiting playgrounds and going on adventures.

We spent a couple of glorious days camping with Drew and Jami-Lee (and their Mommy) and had hoped to camp with Sam and Nate too. When that didn’t work out, two-year-old Sam had a sleepover in the trailer with us in his very own driveway!

What would summer be without the beach, whether it be a prairie lake or a rocky ocean shore? Here’s a gallery of some of my favourite memories from this summer:

Jami-Lee and Drew at Gull Lake near Lacombe, AB

   

   

   

Sam and Nate at Cates Park in North Vancouver, BC

I was amazed at how sure-footed 17-month-old Nate was on the wet, barnacled rocks!

   

Is it any wonder that we feel so blessed?

Who’s the parent?

/ edebock / 2 Comments

As my mother’s Alzheimer’s progresses and caring for her becomes a greater challenge for my father, our relationship is changing. I’m beginning to feel more like parent than child. No longer is a visit a time to kick back and relax. Instead, it’s a time when I do whatever I can to make their lives a little bit easier.

For the past several years, we’ve been in the habit of giving the apartment a thorough cleaning whenever we visited; doing the things that Dad didn’t have the time or energy for or that his failing eyesight kept him from noticing. Now there’s Victoria, the bubbly Filipina housekeeper/caregiver who comes in twice a week. What a blessing she has been! This time we didn’t have to do any housework but there were many other ways that we were able to help out.

Until this visit, my proud and independent father had never asked me for help. In fact, in the past, much of what we did around the apartment we did when he was out because he wouldn’t have wanted us to do it. Now, however, all that has changed. For the first time ever, my father actually asked me for help! Together we took care of paperwork that he would have needed a magnifying glass to struggle through on his own. I also accompanied them to the geriatric clinic, took care of Mom while Dad went to the dentist and shopped for things for Mom and for the apartment.

It would be so much easier if we lived closer and I could drop in for a few hours once or twice a week instead of visiting only three or four times a year but I can’t beat myself up over that. I couldn’t afford to live in Vancouver even if I wanted to. The cost of housing is astronomical. When I start feeling guilty about not being there often enough, I simply remind myself that it was my parents who moved me far away from there in the first place. They chose to return long after I’d grown up and made a life for myself somewhere else.

Each time we visit, I go away happy if I feel that we’ve won a few victories; accomplished a few things that make life better for them. This time that included Richard taking Dad out to shop for some much needed clothing for himself.

I don’t think I’ll ever be completely comfortable with the need to cut my mother’s meat for her and help her dress, the things that she once did for me, but I’m glad to be able to do them once in awhile. I was especially delighted to be able to take her out for a long walk in the sunshine. Though she enjoyed it thoroughly and some of the flowers in Central Park were bright enough for her to actually be able to see, she seldom agrees to leave the apartment except to go to medical appointments.

Knouff Lake, British Columbia

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When Richard’s sisters and brothers gathered for our niece’s wedding at Sun Peaks, several of us camped together at beautiful Knouff Lake Resort. Towing our trailers up the long steep climb to the crystal clear lake nestled between the mountains about 3800 feet above sea level was well worth the effort. Established in 1904, this 4-season resort is advertised as one of the oldest fishing camps in B.C. but it is much more. Surrounded by the beauty of nature, it provides a tranquil getaway from the hustle of day to day life. Owners, Don and Gloria Lamberton, went out of their way to make our stay a comfortable and memorable one. They even provided us with a key to the gate so that family could come and go after the usual 10:00 p.m. closing time.

That’s our trailer on the right.

Our sister-in-law, Brenda, is an avid geocacher like us. When I mentioned that I’d seen on the geocaching.com website that there was a cache hidden on one of Knouff Lake’s tiny islands, she was determined that we should find it. Richard’s sister, Sue, was intrigued when she heard us talking about searching for these hidden treasures so the morning after the wedding, she joined us and the three of us set off on an adventure. The husbands, thinking us a bit crazy, stayed in camp.

Though I much prefer the quietness of a canoe, the Lambertons were reluctant to rent one to three prairie chicks so we set out in a big, flat-bottomed rowboat instead. Since I was born a coastal girl and learned to row at the age of 6 or 7, I took the oars and off we went. Sue was a little nervous but I assured her that we’d have to try very hard to capsize that thing on such calm waters. By the time we returned to camp, she’d taken a turn at the oars and what fun we’d had!

As we pulled ashore on Beaver Island, we three women in our 50s and 60s felt like kids on a Tom Sawyeresque adventure. With GPS units in hand, we clambered through the undergrowth and soon found the cache exactly where it was supposed to be.

My sis-in-laws, Sue & Brenda

We’d also been told about a memorial on one of the other islands, placed there in memory of an avid fisherman and outdoorsman who hosted an annual fishing derby at the lake each summer until his untimely death in 2009. Before returning to camp we rowed over to check that out and also discovered the skeleton of a teepee standing nearby.

Until Stacey began planning her wedding we were completely unaware that Knouff Lake (also known as Sullivan Lake) even existed but now that we’ve found this hidden gem, we’ll likely be back again. It’s only a short distance off our usual route between home and Vancouver, a trek that we make two or three times a year to visit grandchildren and elderly parents. We don’t often have the trailer with us though so perhaps next time we’ll rent one of the rustic log cabins overlooking the lake.

Here comes the bride!

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On a misty summer morning ten years ago my cousin was married in the First Nations feasthouse on the top of Grouse Mountain overlooking Vancouver, BC. Though he arrived via the Grouse Grind, a challenging 2.9 km hiking trail that climbs 2800 feet up the face of the mountain, his bride and most of the guests took the easier way up the mountain arriving via the Skyride, North America’s largest aerial tramway.

On Friday, we attended another mountain wedding. Our niece , Stacey, was married high above Sun Peaks Resort near Kamloops, BC. This time the bridal party and their guests, including Stacey’s 88-year-old grandmother, arrived via chairlift!

It was a beautiful sunny day and the setting was spectacular.

The ceremony was simple and meaningful. It was truly a family celebration with Stacey’s brother, Martin, as her “man of honour” and Gerhard’s father and older brother as his two groomsmen. Even Odin, their beloved canine was present! Richard was honoured to be asked to bring a blessing.

Congratulations, Stacey and Gerhard! May all your days be blessed and may your life together be as beautiful as the day on the mountain!

A life of its own

/ edebock / 5 Comments

I’m a Site Stats junkie. When I’m at home, I check WordPress several times a day to see how many people have viewed my blog. I guess that sounds a little narcissistic but I love knowing that someone has read what I’ve written and I’m always fascinated to see where they’re from and what search terms have led them here.

We were home for less than a week in June. Most of the month I was either camping without internet access or so busy that I didn’t have time to spend online. Consequently, I only posted three times and I rarely checked my stats. When I finally did, it was with a bit of trepidation. Had Following Augustine died of neglect? Would my stats page show nothing but a flat line like a heart monitor on a patient with no pulse?

No! It appears that the blog has taken on a life of its own.

Even when I’m not here, when I’m off gallivanting instead of writing and I’m not even checking my stats, you, my faithful readers are still here!

It thrills me to know that because the trailer is packed and we’re leaving again tomorrow morning! There will probably be much to blog about over the next few weeks but once again, we won’t always have access to the internet and when we do I’ll sometimes be too busy. There’s a family wedding to attend near Kamloops, BC and grandchildren and aging parents to visit in Vancouver. We’ll also cross by ferry to Vancouver Island and spend a few days with some of Richard’s relatives at Port Alberni. When our time with family is over, rather than coming straight home, we’re going to follow BC’s gold rush trail through the mighty Fraser River canyon to Cache Creek then on northward through Cariboo country. With a side trip to historic Barkerville, we’ll continue at least as far north as Prince George before circling back into Alberta. Along the way there will be geocaches to find and perhaps a few golf course to play as well as lots of history to explore.

Yes, there will be much to blog about and I will update as often as possible. In the meantime though, I’m happy to know that the blog will survive without me!