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How far would you go for a party?

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This weekend I did something I never imagined that I would do. I flew all the way to Vancouver for a party! I left Friday morning and was back home again by supper time on Sunday! It was a whirlwind trip, but I’m so glad I went.

It was over ten years ago that I wrote this post about my older brother. More than a decade before the measles vaccine became available, Donald, an infant at the time, suffered irreversible brain damage due to encephalitis, a severe, often fatal, complication of measles. Although my parents were told that they should put him in an institution, they refused and we grew up together. He has, however, been in care all of his adult life. Since 1981, before the Community Living Society that now provides residential and personalized community-based support to individuals throughout Vancouver and the Lower Mainland of BC, came into existence, Trudy M has been one of Donald’s primary caregivers. After 43 years with CLS and even longer with Donald, Saturday’s party was a well-earned celebration of Trudy’s retirement. How could I not be there?

Over the years, Trudy has become family. Mom and Dad adored her and as I said when asked to say a few words on behalf of our family at the party, four of us became siblings by birth, she became our sibling through hard work and dedication.

The only reason that I had considered not going to the party and the reason that my stay in Vancouver was so short was the fact that this is the beginning of what we in my community theatre group call “hell week”. This Friday is opening night of our latest play and it’s all hands on deck to ensure that we’re ready to entertain our audiences. Thankfully, our director is also a close personal friend who knew how important it was to me to be able to slip away for Trudy’s party.

Although I was in Vancouver for less than 48 hours and in spite of the fact that it was a damp, drizzly weekend, I arrived in the city on Friday in time to watch one of my grandsons play a game of rugby. That was particularly meaningful to me because he attends and was playing for the same high school that I attended 60 years ago!

My sister and I also fit in a long walk on Saturday morning. Coming from Alberta where we still have sub zero temperatures and lots of snow, we enjoyed the humidity and the signs of spring that we won’t see here for awhile yet.

International Women’s Day 2026

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March 8 is International Women’s Day and this year’s theme is one that I’m very passionate about. Give to Gain is a worldwide call to lend our support to the advancement of girls and women in the ongoing struggle for gender equality. As individuals, giving support can mean calling out stereotypes, challenging discrimination, questioning bias, celebrating women’s success, and much more.

Give to Gain can also be financial and, although there are many great organizations to choose from, I’m going to highlight two of them for your consideration. I’ve mentioned the first one many times before. Kiva is a global non-profit organization that facilitates microloans to underserved entrepreneurs around the world. With as little as $25, you can help fund one of these loans. As the borrower repays their loan, the money is returned to your Kiva account to be lent again. This is truly a gift that keeps on giving! Although Kiva lends to both men and women, 84.8% of the loans that were disbursed in 2025 went to women. This is partially due to a strategic focus on combating systemic financial inequality. Also, it has been shown that money in the hands of women tends to have a much greater impact on the welfare of their families and communities. When mothers are given the resources to provide for their families, children go to school and when children go to school, change occurs. Kiva’s International Women’s Day goal is to fully fund 5000 loans to women this week!

CARE is another organization that puts women and girls at the centre of all they do because they know that we can’t overcome poverty until all people have equal rights and equal opportunities. CARE Canada supports 50 projects and initiatives in 35 countries, working across four main pillars: her health, her safety, her livelihood, and emergency response. Every donation made to CARE during the month of March will be matched by corporate sponsors, so this would be a good time to double your impact. 

While the plight of women is much greater in many other parts of the world, we mustn’t forget that we have yet to achieve equality here in North America. As of early 2025 in Canada, women held nearly half of all jobs (47.4%), but a 13% gender wage gap continued to persist. In other words, women earned 87¢ for every dollar earned by a man. In addition, women are underrepresented in leadership, holding only 36.4% of managerial roles and less than 29% of senior management and legislative positions. Women in Canada are more likely than men to live in homes that fall below acceptable housing standards. Women are five times more likely than men to be victims of reported sexual assault. Roughly 30% of all women in Canada over the age of 15 report having been sexually assaulted at least once. Human trafficking is happening right now in communities across Canada and over 90% of the victims are women and girls. The list of inequalities goes on, but what can we do this International Women’s Day to make a difference? How can we Give to Gain in these situations?   

We can give our voice to these issues advocating for policy change by writing to local or national leaders and pushing for legislation that addresses gender inequality, such as closing the gender pay gap or combating gender-based violence. We can call out gender bias every time we see, hear or witness it, actively challenging stereotypes, discrimination, and misogyny. We can include men in discussions about gender equality and emphasize the importance of working together to achieve positive change. We can give our time to local organizations that specifically help women, such as shelters for survivors of domestic violence or mentorship programs for young girls. 

As Gloria Steinem once said, “The story of women’s struggle for equality belongs to no single feminist nor to any one organization but to the collective efforts of all who care about human rights.”

Schedules, rhythms, and writing

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I’ve been thinking a lot about schedules and rhythms since reading this post and watching this video earlier in the week. A schedule, as you’re already no doubt aware, is a detailed, clock and calendar-based plan with set times for tasks, activities, and events. A rhythm, on the other hand, is more flexible and better accommodates spontaneity while still maintaining some structure and routine. 

When I was teaching school, my life was very scheduled. Days were ruled by the clock and the bell. One of the greatest joys of retirement has been more freedom and flexibility. I attend church at the same time every Sunday morning and during the winter months I lead a ladies Bible study at 10 o’clock on Tuesday mornings and I bowl at 9:30 AM on Wednesdays. Other than that, unless I have a medical appointment, I’m not tied to a schedule. There is, however, a rhythm to my days.

I usually get up sometime between 7:00 and 8:00. Five days a week, from Monday to Friday, I spend about 20 minutes exercising before I leave the bedroom. Once I’m dressed for the day, I move to my den where I spend some time in prayer. Next, it’s time for breakfast and then I sit down at my computer with a cup of green tea. I read and respond to emails and messages, then read the news. I’m not really a morning person, but this rhythm or routine allows me to move into my day with ease. As I often tell hubby, mornings are meant to be approached gradually! 

Although there’s less structure to the rest of my day, I usually do laundry on Tuesdays and Fridays and edit Kiva loans on Thursday mornings. We generally eat lunch between noon and 1:00 and I like to have supper on the table not later than 6:30. 

I’ve learned that there’s one thing I can’t schedule or plan with any predictability and that’s writing. For some time now, I’ve been trying to publish a blog post every Friday. Even though those posts are often written earlier in the week, I’m still finding that that feels too rigid and doesn’t always work for me. I don’t want to simply write and publish because it’s on my schedule or something that I feel I have to do. Instead, I want to write when I have something worth saying. That might be once a week, but sometimes it’s more often and sometimes less.

When I introduced my weekly Fashion Friday feature in March 2016, I was looking for a way to ensure that I wrote and published something on a regular basis, especially during those times when there wasn’t a lot else going on to write about. I’m actually amazed that it went on for as long as it did before I started to run out of ideas! Over the years, the fashion blogs that I’ve followed have either fizzled out or gone commercial, becoming what I call shopping blogs, basically advertising arms for the companies that sponsor them. Most of the bloggers that I continue to follow have a wider focus. Fashion is just one of the topics that they write about and that’s what I visualize for the future of Following Augustine. I plan to continue blogging indefinitely and I hope to include a fashion post from time to time, but I’m no longer going to try to schedule a post every Friday. I need to allow myself more flexibility. 

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I’m curious about your thoughts about schedules and rhythms. Is your life more schedule oriented or does the idea of living by rhythm appeal to you? Please let me know in the comment section. 

 

 

Saying yes to the unexpected

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From time to time over the years, I have experienced the joy that comes from saying yes to the unexpected. While it’s easy to stay within what’s predictable and familiar, saying yes often requires us to step out of our comfort zone and stretches us as a person.

In mid December, I received an email from the president of CNETS (the Canadian Neuroendocrine Tumour Society) asking me if I would be interested in sharing my patient story at a pharmaceutical company gathering in Kananaskis on January 20th. While I seldom give an immediate response to an unexpected request, preferring to give myself time to think about it first, I knew right away that this was something I wanted to do. Since there was nothing on our calendar to prevent me from saying yes and since we could also combine it with a weekend visit with our daughter’s family on the way, I sent off a quick reply saying yes to this unexpected opportunity. I will admit that the location in the beautiful Rocky Mountains of southwest Alberta was an added incentive!

The event was held in the Black Diamond Club, an exclusive “hotel within a hotel” at the Pomeroy Kananaskis Mountain Lodge, and we were provided with one night’s luxury accommodation there. Here’s the beautiful view from the window of our room early Tuesday morning.

The group that I would be speaking to on Tuesday was made up of approximately 20 individuals from across the country plus a member of the company’s legal counsel from the US. We were invited to have dinner with them on Monday evening and by the time we’d spent a couple of very relaxing hours over a delicious meal together, I felt so comfortable with them that any nervousness I might have felt about sharing my story had completely evaporated. They have an unwritten rule that when they assemble in person they don’t discuss politics or religion, probably very wise considering the state of the world that we live in today. Instead, conversation around the table ranged from families to food to travel and a variety of other topics. After dinner, hubby and I relaxed in the outdoor hot tub before retiring for the night.

The following morning my story was very well received. As the producers of a generic version of a medication that is commonly used by neuroendocrine patients, they wanted to hear about my journey to diagnosis, my treatments, and what it has been like living with NETS (neuroendocrine cancer), as well as what tools or support services might be helpful to the NETS community. I was impressed by the fact that  they were very interested in learning about the disease from the patient’s perspective. There were audible gasps and even a few tears, but also moments of laughter as they hung on every word. My half hour talk was followed by a question and answer period during which they asked some very insightful questions and expressed their appreciation for all that I shared.

Once again, saying yes to the unexpected was a very rewarding experience and one that I’d be happy to repeat. When we take a chance and step into the unknown, we have the opportunity to make new connections, discover new strengths, and open ourselves up to unexpected rewards. I believe in embracing life and living it to the fullest, so I hope to have more opportunities to say yes to the unexpected!

Struggling with social media

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I’ve written about my love/hate relationship with Facebook before. Looking back, I can’t believe it’s been 10 years since I wrote that post and here I am once again feeling the same sort of frustration that I felt back then although for somewhat different reasons.

With over 3 billion active users, Facebook continues to be the world’s most popular social media platform, but it’s driving me crazy! I originally joined to connect with people who were important to me. I miss the days when my feed was filled with their photos and status updates. Now every time I look at Facebook, I see endless posts about the horrors happening south of our border, the vocal minority who want our province to separate from Canada, and the latest well-known evangelical Christian to admit to sexual sin, as well as numerous AI generated stories that may or may not contain elements of truth. I swear that my blood pressure climbs every time I scroll! Apparently, social media algorithms think these are the things I want to see, but they are not! I read local, national, and world news on several sites of my own choosing every day. I don’t need to see it on social media.

In the past, I found that I could clean up my newsfeed by hiding or blocking the sources of posts that I didn’t want to see. I’m still trying to do that, but it doesn’t seem to work as well as it once did. For every source that I block, several more appear. There seems to be no end of them!

So what’s the answer? What would happen if I just stepped away? Would I lose friendships? Would I miss something important? I know that I would lose the one connection that I still have with a number of acquaintances around the world and I would miss that, but is it worth it? That’s the decision that I’m struggling with. As long as I didn’t completely delete my Facebook account, I’d still be able to use Messenger to chat with those that I’m more closely connected with and I do want to continue linking my blog posts to Facebook as that’s where many of you find them and comment on them.

There are, of course, numerous other social media platforms, but none of them gobble up the time or cause me the frustration that Facebook does. I do have an Instagram account, but I mainly use it to look at what a few others have posted and seldom post anything myself. I also use WhatsApp to chat with a limited number of individuals and, although I’m no longer part of the professional world, I do have a LinkedIn account.

How would you describe your relationship with social media? Do you find it as frustrating as I do? How do you handle that?

For now, I’m going to continue attempting to curate my Facebook feed by unfollowing or blocking sites that frustrate me and I’m also going to try to set limits on how much time I spend on social media. Perhaps that will help.

Paper or digital?

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There was a time when I wrote everything by hand. As a university student in the early 1970s, while most of my peers were cranking out essays on manual or electric typewriters, every paper that I submitted was handwritten. It wasn’t because I didn’t know how to type. My mother had insisted that typing was a skill that every girl should have, so I had taken typing classes in high school. I just preferred to write by hand. My early freelance articles were handwritten, but I typed a final copy for submission because  that was required by most publications. Then came computers and the ease of word processing. I made the transition to writing on a keyboard and never looked back.

There are, however, some areas where I have intentionally hung onto vestiges of the past.

In a world where it seems that we’re constantly glued to screens, I still prefer a physical, paper calendar that gives me a visual overview of upcoming appointments and events. One hangs on our kitchen wall and I carry a smaller version in my purse.

I also use a simple paper planner where I write my daily to-do list. Putting pen to paper and actually writing down my intentions and placing them where I will see them multiple times throughout the day keeps me focused on accomplishing them and there’s something deeply satisfying about crossing off each item as it’s completed. Unlike digital alerts that disappear once they’re completed, a handwritten paper planner also provides a record of tasks completed and gives me a greater sense of accomplishment. Ultimately though, the best calendar or planner is the one that a person will use consistently and for me, that’s paper.

Then there’s books. When we travel, I absolutely love the convenience of the e-reader that my daughter gave me for Christmas a couple of years ago, but at home I still prefer to immerse myself in the pages of an actual, physical book.

What about you? Have you completely joined the digital world or are you like me, still a little bit old-school?

One word for 2026

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At the beginning of each new year, I like to choose one word to inspire or guide me throughout the year ahead as well as a scripture verse to go along with it. For the past two years, my word was hope, a word that continues to inspire me to hold fast to a God who is who He says He is and can do what He says He will do.

Although I often find myself pondering what my new word should be during the final days of December, I’ve known since late summer or early fall what my one word for 2026 would be.

Joy!

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines joy as “a feeling of great pleasure and happiness” but joy is much more than that. Joy is a choice. It’s a a deep, enduring contentment that isn’t dependent on circumstances.  It’s a deeper emotion than happiness and often comes from having a sense of purpose or from meaningful relationships with other people. Happiness is fleeting, but joy sees beauty even during trying times. My goal this year is to be intentional about looking for moments of joy each day.

There were many Bible verses that I could have chosen to go along with my one word for 2026, but I settled on Romans 15:13 because it so beautifully ties this year’s word with my last one.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Have you chosen a word for 2026? I’d love to know what it is.

Navigating family life during a teacher strike

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I was working on a fashion post for today, but then life got in the way. You may or may not be aware of the fact that teachers in this province have been on strike since October 6th. After almost three weeks out of his normal routine, our 11-year-old neurodiverse grandson was bored out of his mind. Mom and Dad were working and he was driving his teenage siblings crazy, so Gram and Grandpa decided to come to the rescue. Yesterday we drove three hours to their place, stayed the night, and then brought him home with us today.

Grandpa had a dentist appointment in Camrose on the way home, so we stopped there for lunch, a bit of shopping and a walk around beautiful Mirror Lake.

We have no idea how long our young guest will be with us. There could be movement on the teacher strike as early as Monday or it could drag on for awhile longer. In the meantime, between playing substitute parent to a very busy boy and trying to figure out how to feed him (he has celiac disease and food avoidance issues), I hope to find time to finish that fashion post for next week!

A life transformed

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Back in August when I wrote this post about several 50 year milestones in my life in 2025, I mentioned that In October it would be 50 years since I made the life-changing decision to follow Christ. A couple of readers mentioned that they would be interested in hearing more about how I reached that decision. I had already been thinking about sharing that story on the blog, so I decided I would do it today, the 50th anniversary of the day that my life was transformed.

As far back as I can remember, my family went to church every Sunday morning. I attended Sunday School and youth group and for several years, church camp was the highlight of my summers. In my early teens, I attended confirmation classes to learn more about the church and the Christian faith. The purpose of these classes was to prepare us for church membership, but when the classes ended and the minister asked me if I was ready to join the church, I said no. I felt that something was missing, but I didn’t know what it was. I knew that Jesus loved me and that He had died for me, but I felt that there must be more to it than that. When I discovered that all the other students in the class were going to join, however, I didn’t want to be the only one who was left out, so I changed my mind. After all, I was a good kid, a quiet kid who didn’t like to stand out from the crowd.

The summer before my final year of high school, my father took a job in the Northwest Territories and we moved from Vancouver to Yellowknife; from the third largest city in Canada to a small, isolated  community in the middle of nowhere. I had to leave my home, my friends, my school, my church, and everything else that mattered to a teenage girl. I wouldn’t get to graduate with my class. I was angry and I made a very conscious decision to rebel. I decided that I was going to find out how the other half lived. I quit going to church and started drinking and partying. I abandoned the morals that I had been taught and less than two years after leaving Vancouver, I entered into a teenage marriage that never should have happened.

We had only been married for a year and a half when my husband, a very charismatic narcissist, told me that he had fallen in love with someone else. He didn’t want our marriage to end though. Instead, he wanted to invite her to move in with us! I absolutely refused to allow that to happen and tried for another year to make our relationship work, but midway through my third year of university, it was over and we went our separate ways. I was broken. My dreams were shattered and I felt like unwanted, unloved garbage. That led to more unhealthy relationships.

In spite of all that was going on in my personal life, I managed to graduate from university with my teaching degree and I accepted a job in the very small town where we still live today. I realized that as a teacher in such a small community, my life would be on display for everyone to see. It was the mid 1970s and I was sure that if I continued to live the way I had been, parents wouldn’t want me teaching their kids.

Once again, I made a conscious decision to turn my life around. I thought I could do it on my own, but God had a much better plan. Richard was also a new teacher at the school that year. One evening early in the fall, he shared with me what it meant to be a Christian in a way that I had never heard before. He told me that if I acknowledged my sins, asked for God’s forgiveness, and surrendered my life to Christ, I could have a personal relationship with Him and my life would be transformed. I quickly realized that this was the missing piece that I hadn’t heard about growing up. I didn’t know that I had to make an actual decision to follow Christ or that I could have a personal relationship with Him.

At the same time, I also realized that making that decision would mean giving up control of my own life. Considering what a mess I’d been making of it up to that point, you would think that this would be an easy or obvious decision, but I wrestled with it. Eventually though, I couldn’t deny that God was calling me and I finally surrendered my stubborn will to His. When that happened my life changed completely. There were no flashes of lightning or tongues of fire, just an incredible peace that I had not known before. I felt like a brand new person, free of any guilt or shame over my past. I no longer had any desire to live the way I had been.

I quickly learned that God didn’t want to be a distant deity who cared about me, but who wasn’t personally involved in my life. Like a Japanese kintsugi artist, He began to fill the broken places in my life with gold and turn me into a vessel that He could use for His good purposes.

I wish that I could tell you that life was always easy after that, but of course, it wasn’t. In John 16:33, Jesus tells us, “In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” Over the past 50 years, I have suffered great loss and betrayal. I have spent the last 12 of those years fighting cancer, but I have never been alone in any of these dark times. One of my favourite Bible verses is Isaiah 41:10 which says, “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” I can testify to the truth of that!

Whatever you take away from this post, please note that this is not about church or even about religion, it’s about an intimate, personal relationship with the Creator of the universe; a relationship that is available to everyone regardless of who you are and what you’ve done. If you have any questions or would like to chat about this, please feel free to comment below or send me an email at debock2@gmail.com.

Image: ChatGPT

What’s for lunch?

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I started making bag lunches for my brother and I when I was in junior high. For three of my four university years, I lived off campus and carried a bag lunch almost every day. Then, throughout our teaching career, I made bag lunches for my husband, our children, and I. That’s over 40 years and thousands of sandwiches!

When we retired, I was excited that I’d never have to make bag lunches again, but then came the dilemma that I still live with 18 years later. What should I make for lunch today? In retrospect, making sandwiches every day was easier than having to decide what to feed us for lunch every single day for the rest of our lives!

When my parents were in their later years, they ate the same simple lunch almost every day. It consisted of Laughing Cow cheese and fresh buns from the bakery down the street from their apartment. How boring, I thought, but now I understand! While I don’t think hubby would go for that, he’d probably be happy with mac and cheese or eggs and toast every day. Me, not so much!

I decided to ask ChatGPT for ideas. If you’re not familiar with ChatGPT, it’s a free and easy to use artificial intelligence (AI) chatbot, a tool that can do everything from recommending a book for you to read to helping you plan a trip. In a matter of seconds, it gave me several possibilities. Some include ingredients that I won’t find in my small town grocery store, but others are very doable. I had to laugh though when I saw that the final item on the list was peanut butter and banana sandwiches, something that often appeared in those bag lunches!

The photo was also generated by ChatGPT.

Now it’s your turn. I’d love to hear some simple, nutritious lunch ideas! What are your favourite things to make for lunch?