The Trip

I wasn’t home from Vancouver for a full week before I started packing for the next trip… The Trip. It didn’t take me as far from home or last as long as most trips do but it was one I looked forward to with great anticipation. I spent the past weekend in Edmonton with six friends from church on our 10th annual Christmas shopping trip; a marathon of shopping and fun!

Over the years, our number has varied from three to more than a dozen ladies. I’ve missed only once, the year we lived in Japan.

We’ve learned a lot since our first trip. In the beginning, we’d leave very early Saturday morning, spend one night in a hotel and return home completely exhausted the following evening. Then, for several years, the mother of the one gal who’s been on every trip offered to host us in her home. That’s when the trip became a two nighter. Deb’s mom now lives in a care facility and we’re back to hotelling but we continue to spend two nights in the city.

One year we simply couldn’t find a weekend that worked for enough people so we squeezed the trip into a single day leaving Sedgewick in the wee hours of Saturday morning and arriving home well after midnight! Never again! That was simply way too grueling.

A couple of days after that trip, I met my across the street neighbour in the grocery store. “I almost called you in the middle of the night on Saturday,” she told me. “There was a van backed up at your door and I thought maybe you were being robbed!” I assured her that that was just me arriving home from my annual Christmas shopping trip and unloading all my purchases!

Our accommodations have varied from last year’s dingy motel where, on one of the coldest weekends of the year, one of our rooms had no heat (we were eventually moved to another room) to this year’s luxury digs where Pam and I soaked in the hot tub after a long day of shopping.

Unlike last year’s dingy motel, however, this year’s hotel didn’t include a complementary breakfast so we brought our own picnicking on muffins, yogurt, fruit, juice and coffee before setting off each morning. We also came well supplied with wine and chocolate!

Another lesson we’ve learned is to ensure that we have enough vehicle space for the multitude of bags and boxes that join us over the weekend. We still laugh about our first trip when two women purchased guitars at the very last store we stopped at. There were seven ladies packed into an eight passenger van and it was already fully loaded. We managed to add the guitar boxes to the top of the pile in the rear of the van but every time the driver touched the brakes they slid forward stopping only when they encountered the heads of the poor ladies in the back seat! This year there were seven of us again but we took the eight passenger church van and a large SUV!

Just some of our Saturday purchases!

Where do we shop? Well, over the years we’ve been many different places avoiding only West Edmonton Mall which is just too big and too crowded at this time of year. In recent years, we’ve settled on a route that works well and takes in the widely varied needs and interests of a group that ranges from a very young mom to grandmothers like me.

On our way to Edmonton, we stop in Camrose usually taking in at least Walmart and the Christian bookstore, Wisemen’s Way. The staff at Wisemen’s has learned to expect us at this time of year and have even kept the store open late for us several times. This year we left home early enough to get there during regular store hours.

On Saturday morning, we try to be in the parking lot of Greenland Garden Centre in northeast Edmonton when the doors open at 9:00 a.m. At this time of year, Greenland is transformed into western Canada’s largest Christmas store. Whether or not we buy anything, we all love spending time there soaking up the ambiance and getting in the mood for a full day of Christmas shopping. We also pose for our annual photo in front of one of their gorgeous trees. There’s always a staff member willing to oblige and act as our photographer. One year when there were only three of us, we even had staff members stand in for regulars who were missing!

After we leave the Christmas store, we make our way toward the south end of the city stopping first at Londonderry Mall and then Kingsway Mall. Further south, we visit Blessings, another Christian bookstore; Southgate Mall and several stores in South Edmonton Common. This year a few of us also made a side trip to Cabella’s, a huge outfitting store on Anthony Henday Drive. We also added a Toys R Us store to our usual itinery.

On Sunday morning, we go to church together before hitting a few more stores and then heading for home. This year we broke with tradition and included a Y chromosone on Sunday morning. Michelle’s youngest son is in his first year at the University of Alberta so we invited him to join us for church and lunch.

Being our tenth anniversary, we spent a lot of time reminiscing and laughing over past fun and foibles, retelling stories like the one about the wayward guitars and the year that Tracy walked into a pillar bending her glasses out of shape! She was blind as a bat without them so a trip to an optician was quickly added to our agenda. On the same trip, she stumbled and fell in an underground parkade managing not to injure herself or break the fragile gift she was carrying! Tracy moved to Saskatchewan several years ago but we still miss her!

We also instituted a new tradition this year. We stopped for dinner at a Chinese restaurant in Camrose on Friday. When we opened our fortune cookies someone suggested that we purchase a Lotto 649 ticket using the numbers on the backs of everyone’s fortunes. The draw for $3.5 million was to take place on Saturday and we’d have seven chances at the jackpot. Split seven ways, we’d each win          $500 000! We had so much fun all weekend exclaiming over the things we’d buy or the adventures we’d go on if we won that we’ve decided to buy a ticket every year from now on!

On the way home we stopped in Camrose again to check on our luck. Since splitting our $2 win seven ways wouldn’t work very well, we invested in another ticket! That draw is on Wednesday and the jackpot is an estimated $8 million so the dream goes on. It would probably be easy to guess how I’d spend some of my winnings. After all, here’s what my fortune cookie had to say!

Your quotes

Thank you to those of you who not only read my last post but also sent me your favourite quotations! There were some very good ones so without further ado, here they are!

Crystal, a former student who went on to become a teacher, contributed two.

Unable are the loved to die, for love is immortality.

by Emily Dickinson, an especially poignant thought coming so close to Remembrance Day, and

Just accept yourself and find something that brings you closer to complete.

by Anthony Raneri of the band, Bayside.

My friend, Doris, sent the following quotation by writer, director and performer, John Harrigan.

People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.

These are not simply words to Doris. She and her husband, Ken, are currently giving of themselves to those who need loving at an addictions centre in Langley, BC.

Fellow blogger, Jeannie at gracefully50, sent this favourite quote by Linda Wooten.

Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had, and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed.

I’ve recently learned that this is also true of being a daughter of elderly parents!

It seems that many of us like posting words on our walls. My brother-in-law, Jeff, sent this quote that he and my sister, Linda, had hanging on their kitchen wall until it underwent renovations recently.

We don’t believe in miracles, we rely on them.

If my online search is correct, that’s an adaptation of a quote by Peter J. Lawrence, an educator best known as the originator of the Peter Principle, the concept that people are often promoted until they reach their level of incompetence and then remain there. Hmm… I may have known some of those people during my days of employment! Oops! Did I really say that? I digress!

On the topic of miracles, LouAnn posted another great quote on her blog, On the Homefront, this week.

There are only two ways to live your life. One as though nothing is a miracle. The other as though everything is a miracle.

Well said, Albert Einstein and well said, dear readers. Thanks for sharing!

Lover of words and collector of quotes

I am a lover of words.

A couple of my favourite words are tranquility and serenity, not just because of the peaceful images they conjure up but because I love the sound of them, the way they roll off the tongue. To my eye, they even look pretty!

Do you have a favourite word?

I’m also a collector of quotes, jotting down interesting ones whenever I see them. Since I don’t really have anything in particular to say in my own words today, I thought I’d just share a few of these with you.

Several have a common theme. If you know me or have been reading my blog for very long, you can probably guess what that might be. Perhaps this one by American writer and filmmaker, Susan Sontag, says it best.

I haven’t been everywhere but it’s on my list!

Caskie Stinnett, American travel writer, humorist and magazine editor who, coincidentally, died fourteen years ago today at the age of 87, put it this way

I travel a lot; I hate having my life disrupted by routine!

This variation on a well-known anonymous quotation appears in the front of the bestseller, 1000 Places to See Before You Die.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the places and moments that take our breath away.

Not all my favourite quotations are about travel, however. Fellow blogger, LouAnn at On the Homefront, has this one by Robert Allen, author of The One Minute Millionaire, on the bulletin board above her desk and how very true it is.

Everything you want is just outside your comfort zone.

A friend and former student posted this one by D.H. Lawrence on Facebook yesterday and I’ve added it to my collection too.

All people dream but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusky recesses of their mind, wake in the morning to find that it was vanity. But the dreamers of the day are dangerous people, for they dream their dreams with open eyes, and many them come true.

I find quotes in the oddest of places. I was on my way to the bathroom in a restaurant in Osoyoos, BC a few years ago when I spotted this one by Frederick W. Smith, the founder and CEO of FedEx, on a poster on the wall.

Nothing is as necessary for success as the single-minded pursuit of an objective.

Martin Luther King Jr. said many profound things. Among my favourites is

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.

American author and lecturer, Marilyn vos Savant, said

To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.

The authors of some of my favourite quotations are, unfortunately, unknown. I would love to give credit to the writers of

We cannot direct the winds but we can adjust our sails.

and

When you stumble, make it part of the dance.

but I cannot. Lastly, a plaque on my kitchen wall says

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

I don’t know who originated that one either but I’m blessed to have a friend like that.

Do you have a favourite quote? Share it here and I may include a compilation of them in a future post.

Yes, I am a lover of words and a collector of quotes. Perhaps every writer is.

I cast all my cares

I cast all my cares upon You
I lay all of my burdens down at Your feet
And any time I don’t know what to do
I will cast all my cares upon You.

Almost a month ago, while on our way to my parents’ place, I awoke in the middle of the night and began to worry about what lay ahead. Would I be able to cope? Could I provide the care that they needed? As anxiety threatened to consume me, this old Kelly Willard chorus, based on 1 Peter 5:7 “casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you” (NKJV), began to run through my head.

What a life saver that little chorus became! I knew that in my own strength, I wouldn’t have the wisdom or the patience to do all that needed to be done so I determined right then and there to do exactly as the chorus suggested and lay it all at the feet of Jesus.

Were there times in the last month that I didn’t know what to do? You bet there were but whenever I began to feel overwhelmed, I returned to the little chorus and let it bathe my spirit and restore my peace of mind. It became my mantra. Don’t get me wrong; there wasn’t any magic in the words themselves or the ritual of repeating them but they were my prayer. They reminded me where my help was coming from and calmed my frazzled nerves.

Now we’re on our way home, tucked into the same hotel where anxiety threatened to overwhelm me. In addition to cooking meals, doing mountains of laundry, attending to Mom’s day to day needs, ferrying Dad to numerous appointments and hounding his urologist’s office for a surgery date (Dec. 7), we toured care facilities, arranged respite care for Mom for three weeks following Dad’s surgery and set up Meals on Wheels to begin immediately after we left. I also learned how to change and clean a catheter bag! There were moments of frustration and fortunately, moments of humour, but there were no moments of panic or despair. The cares chorus took care of that!

Looking for gnomes

After spending the past three weeks caring for my aging parents, we’ve moved across town to our son and daughter-in-law’s for a few days before we head for home. I’m mentally and emotionally worn out and nervous about leaving Mom and Dad on their own and it hasn’t helped that it’s been grey and rainy the entire time that we’ve been in Vancouver. Fun with our grandsons is just the medicine I need at the moment and what could be more delightful than a walk in the woods to look for gnomes?

Twenty-three years ago, when our son, Matt, was in fourth grade, we shared our home with a Norwegian exchange student. Bjorn came to us bearing unique and interesting gifts for each member of the family. The boys received Norwegian trolls about 6 inches tall with mischievous, grinning faces. In recent months, Matthew’s troll took up residence on a shelf in the kitchen of his home. That led to questions from inquisitive 3-year-old Sam and prompted a discussion about gnomes. Searches of the nearby forest followed to see if any of these dwarfish creatures could be found. Yesterday we were invited to go along on one of these adventures!

Could there be a gnome in here?

Or here?

Though we didn’t see any, there must have been one living under this tree because Mommy “found” a teeny, tiny gold key that fits perfectly into the lock of the tiny gnome door that she and Daddy recently installed on the outer wall of the family room! The plan is to put the key back where it was found so that the gnomes can come to visit if they want to.

   

Robin claims that she had absolutely nothing to do with the little gnome gate that we found deeper in the woods. Perhaps, the little people are protecting their food stores from squirrels or maybe they have treasure hidden here!

Our grandsons, Sam and little brother Nate, are fortunate to live just a couple of blocks from the forest and very blessed to have parents who nurture and encourage their active imaginations. Way to go, Matt and Robin!

Operation Parent Care

When I wondered at the end of a recent post what October would hold, I had no idea that we’d be spending much of it back in Vancouver!

We’ve lived for a long time with the knowledge that we might have to make a quick trip to the coast at any time if something happened to either of my elderly parents. That moment came when my father’s alarmingly large prostate caused a complete urinary blockage about three weeks ago. He also had a urinary infection. My sister, the doctor in the family, flew out first to provide immediate care but she wasn’t able to stay long term. We drove out arriving just a few hours before she had to leave for the airport to return to her family. Having the vehicle here has made it possible for us to ferry Dad to numerous medical appointments and procedures, some related to the prostate problem and some not.

It was with some trepidation that I took over from my sister knowing that in addition to cooking, grocery shopping, laundry and becoming primary caregiver for Mom, who’s in the late stages of Alzheimer’s disease, I’d also be responsible for caring for Dad’s medical needs. Before leaving home, we asked our church family and friends to pray and I have absolutely no doubt that they’ve been doing so. I’m absolutely certain that without those prayers, I would be completely unable to do all that I’ve had to do with any degree of patience or grace. Nothing in life really prepares you for having to clean your father’s catheter twice a day or help your mother change her soiled pants!

By Day 9 of Operation Parent Care, when Mom appeared to have developed a touch of diarrhea, I thought I might have reached the end of my rope. I didn’t know if I could handle another thing. That’s when something in the back of the toilet broke and we had a sudden flood! Water poured from the top of the tank like a mini Niagara. In minutes the bathroom was full of water and it was flowing out the door! Richard waded in, Dad ran (hobbled) off to find a pipe wrench and I called the apartment emergency number. Within minutes a maintenance man arrived at the door like a rescuing angel and in no time at all a powerful shop vac had sucked up most of the water and the toilet’s inner workings had been completely replaced. What could I do but laugh? The tension of the day had definitely been broken and on we went, tiptoeing over dampened carpet for the next 24 hours or so.

Today is Day 12. At this point, we have no idea how long we’ll be here. We do know that Dad requires surgery and that he’ll be catheterized until that takes place. It wasn’t at all comforting to have the specialist assure us that surgery could probably be booked for sometime before Christmas!

Fortunately, Dad’s infection has cleared and he has regained much of his strength. I’m teaching him to care for his own catheter and he’s beginning help with Mom’s care again. Sadly, her condition has deteriorated significantly since we were here just three months ago. My siblings and I are of the opinion that she needs a level of care that can’t really be provided at home, especially by a frail 89-year-old, but I’m not sure how much success we’ll have trying to convince him of that. I hate the idea of leaving them on their own again but what choice do we have. We’ll definitely ensure that someone is here to help when he undergoes surgery but I can’t stay here forever.

Blessed to be 60!

Well, the big day came and went and I don’t feel any different! I’m learning to say “I’m 60” and, just one day into the year, I’m already liking it better than being 59. The whole time I was 59, I dreaded turning 60 but now I realize that it’s just another decade and another new beginning.

Besides, being 60 gives me something to joke about. As friends gathered last evening for what I dubbed my “coming of age girlfriend party” I told them that now that I’m a little old lady, they’d have to  humour me and humour me they did. When I invited them, I told them that if the weather cooperated we’d be celebrating around the fire pit in my back yard. Hearty Albertans that they are, even though the temperature was only 4°C (37°F), they all arrived bundled up and ready for an outdoor party!

Apparently, there are lots of benefits to being 60. I’ve already been able to take advantage of a few discounts available to the over 55 crowd but just think of all the senior discounts I’ll qualify for now!

One of the cards that I received last night says “What kind of gifts does God give for a 60th birthday?” and goes on to list them… Grace, purpose, generations, perspective, contentment, relationships, values, memories. To some, like grace and purpose, I say I hope so and to others, like generations and memories, I say AMEN!

One of the best things about being older is grandchildren and the wonderful memories we make together. I was delighted to receive video messages via email from both sets of grandchildren yesterday and I also enjoyed a wonderful Skype visit with two of our Japanese “grandchildren” and their parents. I am truly blessed!

I also learned that 60 is definitely not too old to try something new. When I stopped by the liquor store a couple of days ago to pick up some wine for the party, I couldn’t resist this. Adult Chocolate Milk made with Premium Red Wine, boasts the label. Turning the bottle over, I read “This ultimate chocolate lover’s wine is a marriage of rich velvety chocolate, the freshest of milk, and premium red wine. This masterfully crafted artisanal concoction can be served on the rocks, like a traditional wine, or used as a mixer in many cocktails. Uptown Girl, a unique blend truly like no other.” It practically followed me home! Sipped on the rocks beside a roaring fire, it was definitely a winner.

My girlfriends obviously know me well. One wrote in her card “One thing I know for sure ~ you like tea ~ you love to read ~ and I’m positive… you love chocolate!” Though the invitation said no gifts, she brought me tea bags, a beautiful bookmark and chocolate covered almonds. Another friend brought me this, a chocolate bouquet made of 60 little chocolate treats! Did I mention how blessed I am?

Titus 2:3-5 says “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” When I received my Bible as a Christmas gift in 1982, I was just 30 years old, a young wife and mother. I highlighted the latter portion of that passage. As years went by, however, the time came when I began to realize that it was the beginning portion that now applied to me. Eventually, I somewhat reluctantly highlighted that part of the passage with a different colour.

As we sat around the fire last night, I gave my girlfriends (all younger than I am) one piece of advice. Don’t do as I did and spend your 59th year worrying about turning 60, I told them. I am blessed to have the privilege and responsibility of going before them and I hope that I am setting a godly example but I also want to show them that aging isn’t such a bad thing.

Thinking about age all the time is the biggest prison women can make for themselves.”  Miuccia Prada

Birthday roses from my hubby!

Banned Books Week

It seems that there is a day, a week or a month for almost everything these days. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month in Canada and the US. October 1 was International Day of Older Persons as well as World Vegetarian Day. Tomorrow is World Teachers’ Day. Though some of these are well publicized, most come and go unnoticed by the majority of us. I wouldn’t have known that this was Banned Books Week had my online friend, Sarah, who is both a librarian and originator of the Awesomeday movement, not mentioned it on Facebook today.

As an avid reader, that definitely caught my attention and I began to do a bit of digging. I was absolutely astonished at what I discovered! Though the practice of governments banning books in Canada and the United States is a thing of the past and there are no books currently banned by either country, specific titles are frequently challenged and sometimes banned by individual school jurisdictions and public libraries.

I was flabbergasted by the books that have been challenged and in some cases, banned. Here are just a few that are considered controversial and are often banned in American schools:

Pulitzer Prize winning To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee which addresses issues of class,  courage, compassion and gender roles in the American South during the Great Depression has been challenged over the years for its use of profanity and racial slurs. Thankfully, not everyone agrees. In fact, in 2006, British librarians ranked the book ahead of the Bible as one “every adult should read before they die”.

Mark Twain’s Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, another American classic, is one of the most frequently banned books in American schools because Twain used the word “nigger” throughout. Surely teachers of American literature can be trusted to explain the reason behind the word; that Twain was trying to reveal the plight of the slave in America and that he was using the vernacular of the time.

Lord of the Flies by Nobel Prize winning author, William Golding, tells the story of a group of British schoolboys stranded on an uninhabited island who try to govern themselves with disastrous results. In 2005, the novel was chosen by Time magazine as one of the 100 best English language novels published between 1923 and 2005 but it is often criticized and in many cases banned from schools because of its use of profanity, sexuality, racial slurs and violence. It is perhaps the book I remember most vividly from high school English class more than 40 years ago. It’s not a pleasant read but do we learn and grow if we read nothing but entertaining fluff?

The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank, the ever-hopeful true story of a young teenager who eventually died in the Holocaust has been banned for being “too depressing”. Unbelievable!

I was perhaps most shocked to find Katherine Paterson’s novel, Bridge to Terabithia, on several lists of most commonly challenged and banned books! As a teacher, I had absolutely no qualms about reading this beautiful book about two lonely children who create a magical forest kingdom to my upper elementary school students year after year. The inspiration for the book, in which one of the main characters dies, came from a tragic event in the author’s own experience when a close friend of her son’s was struck by lightning and died. Death is a reality, even for children, and this book handles it exquisitely.

I could go on and on about books that have been banned from schools but I literally had to laugh out loud over a few of the children’s books that have at one time or another been challenged or banned from public libraries. Librarians must roll their eyes at some of the criticisms parents bring forth!

Believe it or not, in at least one location, the first Where’s Waldo book was banned because in one of the drawings a beach is shown where a woman lying on the sand has part of a breast exposed! This in a nation where pornographic magazines are readily available on news stands! Imagine someone poring over the thousands and thousands of tiny characters featured in a Waldo book and singling out this one “offensive” character! I would have needed a magnifying glass to see her!

Then there’s I Have to Go! by beloved children’s writer, Robert Munsch. What parent hasn’t bundled a tiny tot into a snowsuit or a car seat with a five point harness only to have them announce almost immediately, “I have to go PEE!” If that’s offensive, we might as well ban Thomas’ Snowsuit too. After all, aren’t the teacher and the principal cross-dressers?

I can’t even begin to imagine why anyone would object to Al Perkin’s Hand, Hand, Fingers, Thumb! The story line is a little thin (okay, non-existent) but young children love the madcap band of dancing, prancing monkeys and the book’s rhythmic cadence. I think I might still have a copy of it in the bookshelf in the basement.

Certainly it is the responsibility of every parent to be aware of what their children are reading and in some cases, even to limit those choices. There are books that I’d rather not see on a library shelf and books that I choose not to read. There are books that probably aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on or the time and brain cells required to read them but, as honorary chairman of this year’s Banned Book Week, Bill Moyers, has been quoted as saying, “censorship is an enemy of the truth”. The more widely read we are, the better we will know and understand the world we live in and the people we share this planet with.

Hello October!

October has long been one of my favourite times of year. It’s a bittersweet in-between time; summer is over but winter hasn’t arrived yet.

In my mind, October is golden. We don’t see the reds and oranges that eastern Canada is famous for at this time of year but we have gold; golden fields at rest after harvest and this outside my front window!

Sadly, in no time at all it will look like this, taken during the first week of November last year.

And that’s on one of its best days when it was dressed in hoar frost and the sun was shining on it. No, I’m definitely not a fan of winter but that’s one of the things that makes October so special. Each golden moment is precious because we know it won’t last.

Early October is a time of celebration at our house with both our wedding anniversary and my birthday falling during the first week. Canadian Thanksgiving, celebrated on the first Monday of October, follows hard on their heels.

Later in the month there’s another date that’s important to me. It was 37 years ago in mid October when I surrendered the life that I’d already screwed up royally to the awesome Creator of the universe who had a purpose and a plan for my life (Jeremiah 29:11) and what a difference that made!

As winter approaches, some may consider October a time to hunker down close to home but though days are shorter now and nights are cooler, Canadian poet William Carman Bliss expressed the feeling of my heart when he penned

There is something in October sets the gypsy blood astir,
We must rise and follow her;
When from every hill of flame,
She calls and calls each vagabond by name.

Hello, October! I wonder what you have in store for this gypsy girl this year?

Inspired!

A couple of weeks ago one of my favourite fashion bloggers, Jeannie, writer of gracefully50, published a post in which she wore an unbuttoned trench dress as a long jacket over a tight black dress. It made for a unique and classy look but then, I think Jeannie could wear a paper bag and look stylish!

What intrigued me was the realization that I had very similar items hidden away in my own closet. Neither had seen the light of day in a very long time but they were pieces I hesitated to get rid of; the black dress because, after all, every woman is supposed to have a LBD and the other because I’ve always simply loved it.

This afternoon, my daughter and I dressed up and did a photo shoot. I took pictures for her blog post about her latest fabulous thrift store finds and she photographed me in my take on Jeannie’s outfit. I don’t have the funky shoes or the adorable pup to complete the look but here’s my version.

   

Not only did I love the look but it was amazingly comfortable. Now I just have to decide where to wear it!