My 10 year cancerversary

Do you remember where you were and what you were doing exactly ten years ago today? I do. The day is etched in my memory in vivid detail. That was the day I was told that I had cancer in my colon and that it had already spread to my liver! There was no hope or expectation then that I’d be writing about that day ten years later!

It wasn’t until a couple of weeks later that we learned that what I actually had (and still have) is neuroendocrine cancer (NETS) which, though incurable, usually progresses slowly. That gave us a glimmer of hope, but on one of our earliest clinic visits, we read that the average life expectancy for a neuroendocrine cancer patient was five years following diagnosis. I now know that that information was probably already outdated. There are members of my online patient groups who have been living with this disease for 10, 15, even 20 years or more. Others, however, have not fared as well, so I’ve learned to consider every day a gift.

On a day like today, I could dwell on the fact that over the past ten years I’ve had two major surgeries, been exposed to an enormous amount of radiation, had dozens of tests and scans of various kinds, lived in 28 day increments between injections, had 128 of those “butt darts”, and on and on. Or, I could count my blessings; focusing instead on the things that I’ve been able to do and enjoy over the past ten years.

Since my initial diagnosis, we’ve seen our family grow by one daughter-in-law and four grandchildren! In spite of the worldwide pandemic that put a damper on travel for a time, we’ve holidayed in Nova Scotia, BC, and the Yukon, and traveled to Israel, Europe (Portugal, Italy, France, Belgium, and the Netherlands), and Mexico four times. We purchased a kayak and have spent many hours paddling quiet lakes and rivers. Over the past ten years, we’ve spent 240 nights in our trailer and I’ve played over 350 rounds of golf. We’ve tried new things like snowshoeing and joined a seniors’ bowling league. I’ve edited 1346 microloan descriptions for Kiva and joined a prison letter writing ministry. I’ve had the opportunity to teach two women to read and tutored an ESL student. And again, the list goes on!

Life is good! Yes, I have cancer. Yes, some of my tumours have grown a bit recently, but I still feel 100%. I don’t know what the future holds, but neither does anyone else. I have an army of people who pray for me and we know who holds my future. I’ll just focus on today!

So what am I doing to celebrate this momentous occasion? I suppose I could have planned something special, something big, but I’ve been so busy just living life that this one crept up on me! I have absolutely nothing planned, but that’s okay. I’m alive and living life to the fullest and that’s all that really matters!

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Styling a vintage tapestry jacket

Screenshot 2023-08-24 at 5.01.09 PMI’m never ready for summer to end, but fall is definitely in the air! One thing that always makes the seasonal transition easier to bear is looking forward to wearing some of my fall and winter favourites that have been in storage for the past few months. Having something new (or new to me) to wear also adds excitement. After all, I’m sure we all remember the feeling of having something new to wear on the first day of school and, since I spent my entire career in the classroom, I had a lot of those first days!

Today I’m going to share a new for fall item that has been hanging in my closet since an early summer trip to a thrift store with my daughter. I haven’t actually worn it anywhere yet, but with the weather changing, I pulled it out earlier this week and started shopping my closet for ways to wear it.

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If you’re old enough, you probably remember the tapestry vests and jackets that were popular back in the 90s. I had a couple of the vests and now that I see vests coming back into vogue, I kind of wish that I’d kept them, but I never had a tapestry jacket.

Who cares that I’m 30 years late to the party; I love it and I’m very much looking forward to wearing it this fall! Clothing and accessories are considered vintage once they’re at least 20 years old, and in 2023 it seems that vintage fashion is gaining in popularity everywhere. Vintage is a great way to express individuality and it’s so much better for the planet than buying new. Cost can vary a lot. Prices for jackets similar to mine range from $30 CAD to over $160 on Etsy. I was fortunate to find mine in a second-hand store for $14.50. 

The key to wearing vintage and not looking like you’re wearing a costume is to add one vintage piece to an otherwise contemporary outfit as I’ve done in today’s photos. Another idea is to look for vintage pieces in classic styles. My vintage jacket in a different fabric would fit right in with today’s looks.

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So, how did I put today’s looks together. Since the jacket is a multi-coloured, stand-out piece, I paired it with basic solid-colour pieces. In the first photo above, I’m wearing it with a navy Uniqlo t-shirt and dark olive chino’s from Mark’s. Both pieces are several years old. Immediately above, I’ve switched out the chinos for a favourite pair of dark wash jeans from Old Navy, also several years old. Below, I’m wearing the same jeans with an olive green top that I bought second-hand about a year ago. 

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There are many shades of pink, rust, green, brown, beige, peach, grey, and even a few bits of blue in the tapestry, so it would be easy to wear this jacket with many other colours. I can also give it a modern twist by rolling the sleeves.

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The impact of the Barbie movie on fashion

Screenshot 2023-08-14 at 11.58.52 AMEver since the Barbie movie, featuring Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling, was released last month, women and girls of every age (and men too) have been flocking to the theatres dressed in pink. Pink is definitely having a big moment in the fashion world!

Historically, pink was just another colour worn by men and women alike and, in many parts of the world, it still is. In North America, however, it’s been considered a feminine colour since the 1920s when US department stores arbitrarily made the decision that blue would be for boys and pink for girls. Later came an era when pink was thought to be too girly. Women who loved pink weren’t taken seriously and boys who wore pink were accused of being gay. All those stereotypes have been shattered by the Barbie movie phenomenon.

Living where I do, two hours from a major shopping mall, I haven’t been in a clothing store for quite awhile, but a quick look at a few of my favourite Canadian retailers online turned up an amazing array of pink; every shade of pink imaginable, but especially Barbie’s iconic hot pink.

There were casual clothes, of course, like this tank top and wide-legged linen cargo pants from Reitmans.

But also dressier pieces like this satin wrap skirt from Ricki’s.

Satin Wrap Skirt Ricki's

And even business appropriate suits and blazers like these from Cleo and Ricki’s.

Cropped Pant Suit Cleo

Single Breasted Blazer Ricki's

I can imagine Barbie wearing a bright pink trench coat, can’t you? This one’s from Reitmans.

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The only pink in my wardrobe is a couple of golf shirts and special bright pink hoodie that I’ve had for many years, but if I was in the market for new walking shoes, I’d definitely consider these Asics from the Marks website!

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But, back to the Barbie movie. I haven’t seen it myself and I don’t know that I will, but I did see a trailer that looked like it might be fun. What is it though that is drawing huge crowds to a movie about a doll having an existential crisis and venturing into the real world? Certainly one of the things driving the phenomenon is nostalgia. Women who grew up playing with Barbie can relive a part of their childhood and in many cases, share the experience with their daughters and granddaughters.

I never had a Barbie doll. I was 6 when Mattel officially introduced her to the world on March 9, 1959. Perhaps my mother was a woman before her time, but from the beginning, she didn’t like the unrealistic beauty standards presented by the doll. About that time, she and my father made a trip to the States. There, she bought my little sister a Vogue Ginny doll and me a Jan. Compared to Barbie, with her ridiculously minuscule waist, Jan had some meat on her bones and was definitely more pleasing to my mother’s sensibilities. Somewhat later, my sister and I both received a Tammy doll for Christmas. Tammy was created by the Ideal Toy Company and made her debut in 1962. She was portrayed as an American teenager with a “girl next door” image. Although I didn’t have a Barbie, I did have her younger sister, Skipper, and she was probably my favourite of the three.

Perhaps for girls and women who did grow up with Barbie, her iconic pink evokes not only nostalgia, but a sense of fun and escape to a time when life was more carefree and joyful. That would certainly explain the crowds dressed in pink lining up at the box offices and the influx of pink in clothing stores this summer!

What about you? Did you play with Barbie? Have you seen the movie? If so, did you dress in pink? I’d love to know your thoughts on the movie, the hoopla surrounding it, or the colour pink in general.

The 3rd piece rule

Logo by SamIt’s been an unusually hot summer this year and I’ve spent most of it in shorts and sleeveless tops. Lately, however, there’s been a hint of fall in the air, especially first thing in the morning. I sometimes find myself putting on longer pants and reaching for a third piece.

Though you know that I’m not a follower of fashion rules, there is a “3rd piece rule” that actually makes sense a lot of the time. The idea is that for an outfit to go from good to great, it needs three key elements. Usually, your top and bottom (skirt, pants, or shorts) are the two main elements and the third piece is something extra that finishes the look. It could be a blazer, sweater, vest, scarf, or hat, but for me, it’s often an unbuttoned shirt.

Here’s just one example from my closet. All three pieces have appeared on the blog before. 

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During the hotter part of the day, I’ll break the 3rd piece rule and abandon the overshirt. For me, the third piece is more about warmth, than style. 

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You might be wondering about shoes and how they fit into the 3 piece formula. Apparently, they don’t. Shoes, boots, or sandals definitely add interest to an outfit, but they aren’t counted as a third piece. In today’s photos, I’m wearing the ECCO walking sandals that I bought back in May. Although they still look new, I’ve put a lot of miles on them over the past 3 months. As I mentioned then, I challenged myself to walk 350 km between May 1 and October 31. At the halfway point, the end of July, I’d walked just over 200 km! 

Opposite views of aging

Logo by SamSince reading Breaking the Age Code and featuring it as my July Book of the Month, I’ve been doing what the author, Dr. Becca Levy, suggested and looking more closely at the messages that I see about aging in the media, in advertising, and on social media. While this topic is much broader than just fashion, I think it’s appropriate for a Friday post because so much of what we see about age is directed at women and their appearance. Take the article that I saw posted on Facebook recently for example. “40+ Short Haircut Tips and Styles That Make Us Look 20 Years Younger”  sounds innocent enough until you ask yourself, why should we want to look 20 years younger? What’s wrong with looking 40, 50, or even 80? The message is that young is good, young is beautiful, and old is not. 

Thankfully, there are positive messages to be found too. “72 is the new 30! Get fit at any age along with this 72 year old fitness star!” implores an ad for an online fitness program. Scientists claim that life expectancy has increased to such an extent that a 72-year-old person today has the same probability of dying as a 30-year-old primitive hunter-gatherer would have had. Hence the saying, 72 is the new 30. That’s good news, I think, but the real message of the ad is that at 72 we can still be active and physically fit.

In contrast, look at this meme taken from Facebook.

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What? We’re old and washed up at 50? Maybe this is supposed to be funny, but it’s exactly the kind of self-defeating, negative message about aging that Dr. Levy wrote about.

Instead, here’s the kind of message we should be seeing.

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This the the kind of age belief that can add years to your life and quality to your years. In the long run, you’ll probably look better than the gal who’s lying on the heating pad eating nachos too!

Book of the month – July 2023

Breaking The Age Code

Becca Levy, PhD

Screenshot 2023-07-14 at 10.05.53 PMHow would you like to extend your life by 7.5 years? According to Dr. Becca Levy, Yale professor and leading expert on the psychology of successful aging, you might be able to do just that!

Breaking the Age Code is a fascinating book that could literally revolutionize how you think about aging. Levy’s premise is that our age beliefs, what we think about older people and about getting older, influence how we age. She presents both factual evidence and interesting anecdotes showing that having positive age beliefs results in better physical and mental health in our senior years and actually extends life expectancy. This makes sense when you consider that having positive age beliefs promotes physical exercise as well as social and intellectual engagement and diminishes stress.

Unfortunately, we who live in North America and Europe are constantly bombarded with negative age beliefs. Even saying that someone is having a “senior moment” suggests that there is truth to the all too commonly accepted stereotype that our brains inevitably deteriorate as we get older. In reality, people of all ages experience these momentary memory lapses and there is tremendous variability in how our brains function as we age.

Breaking the Age Code presents us with easy-to-follow techniques for shifting our age beliefs from negative to positive. The first step involves becoming aware of our own age beliefs as well as recognizing the ageism that is so prevalent in our society. The book is also a call to stand up against ageism and its negative effects.

Not only is Becca Levy one of the world’s leading experts on aging and longevity, but she’s also a wonderful storyteller. Her book is both informative and inspiring and would be of benefit to readers of all ages, those who will be old someday and those who already are.